Paint Me A Blue Sky
by BikerChick101
Summary: She was only 15 when she left and now she was 28 returning home, what could possibly go wrong?
1. Chapter 1

Serena sighed as she looked at all the papers on her desk, her grandmother, Cece, had passed on after a long battle with cancer, leaving a big part of her possessions to Serena, most of it for safe keeping but all of it requiring her signature.

"It's just two more pages and we're done," her lawyer said when he noticed Serena's exhaustion. "Just sign there as well," he said pointing to the extra spot that needed her attention.

"Why couldn't she have had less things," Serena mumbled looking through the last two pages before scrawling her signature onto the bottom of them and then where he pointed. "That's it? Are you sure?"

"I'm sure," the lawyer said chuckling as he inspected the pages, he then gathered all the paper and stacked them before putting the stack into his briefcase.

"Finally," Serena said leaning back in her chair and pushing her hair back.

"About the letter Miss Rhodes left?" he probed lightly, placing his briefcase on the floor and leaning in slightly wanting to know if his client and friend's last wishes will be fulfilled. "She was very adamant about wanting you to do _everything_ that she asked."

"I'm flying out to New York tonight, my mother is sorting out the rest," Serena told him, trying not to look as against the thought of going back to her childhood home as she felt.

"Serena, I'm talking about the second half of that letter," he said breaking out of his professional persona for a moment to let Serena know that he is an old family friend and he knows what her grandmother wanted.

"Can't I just ignore that part and say my tears smudged her words?" she asked with a nervous chuckle and the man raised an eyebrow and stared at her.

"I wouldn't suggest that, your grandmother just wanted you to mend ties with everyone you left behind in New York," he told her and Serena nodded and sighed, she knew exactly what her grandmother wanted, how sad her grandmother knew she was without them. "She knows you didn't want contact with them before and she agreed but she realized that you need them, it's time to make amends."

"I know, she went on about it enough when she was supposed to be resting," Serena said rolling her eyes and the lawyer laughed, Cece was a persistent woman even in her final weeks. "Don't worry, my time in New York will be spent taking care of her last wishes ... my grandmother was right, I need to do this."

"I know how hard this might be and I know there might be repercussions," he told her, holding eye contact with her to make sure that she was paying full attention to him. "If at any time you need representation, give me a call, I won't let you lose."

"That won't be necessary," Serena said shaking her head and laughing, she wasn't that worried about any legal representation for the weekend ahead. "I assure you, it won't come down to that."

"Very good," he said picking up his briefcase and standing up to adjust his suit, back in full lawyer mode. "I'll be in touch Miss van der Woodsen."

"Thank you," she said shaking his hand and walking him out of her office, closing the door and then leaning back onto it and sighing tiredly, it had been almost a week since her grandmother had passed away and it had been filled with lawyers and plans and secrets that needed to come out and crying and she was exhausted.

Serena pushed herself away from the door and walked to her chair so she could sit herself down and close her eyes for a moment. Her grandmother insisted that when she died her funeral should be in New York, her body to be buried in the family plot at the cemetery close to her parents and as far away from her ex-husband as can be managed.

Serena laughed at that request and at the horrific luck this family had with men, she barely knew her grandfather only because her grandmother refused to let him see them, he passed away before Erik was born so all she had were stories from her mother.

Her grandmother dated a few younger men when Serena was little but by the time Serena's mother went through her second divorce Cece had decided that men were too much work and it was time to move on from finding love and just focus on the business her ex-husband trusted her with.

Her mother's track record with men was well known, after her father had left them, there were too many boyfriends and 4 new marriages, only three of which Serena attended, and since then she's only seen her mother a handful of times, enough to know that her latest husband was one of her high school friends fathers and he had died. Since then she's been carrying on a relationship with her high school lover and Serena stopped listening because it all just got much too complicated for her to keep up with.

It hadn't been much different for Serena, she met the love of her life when she was in diapers and he was taken by her best friend by the time they were in pre-school. She realized too late that loving him the way she did would destroy her friendship and she left them both when she was 15, without a goodbye or reason. How young and stupid they had been. She'd had a few relationships in the past 13 years, nothing too serious, nothing worth thinking about.

Her cell phones ring jolted her out of her thoughts and forced her to open her eyes, she glared at her phone for a few seconds when she saw that it was her mother calling and then sighed as she answered the call.

"Hey mom," she answered putting her head back on the desk.

"Serena darling what time are you leaving the office? Your flight leaves soon," she said and Serena could picture her staring at her watch.

"I'm at the airport, call you when I reach New York," she said acting as if she was in a hurry so that she could cut this call quicker.

"Serena, I spoke to Mr. Gibbens, he told me he just left your office," Lily laughed and Serena groaned.

"I'm leaving as soon as the car gets here," Serena said rubbing her temples. "Bags are packed and everything, I'm on schedule."

"Yes I'd expect you would be," Lily said distractedly and Serena rolled her eyes, just another thing her mother says that she would never truly understand.

"Is Erik there yet?" Serena asked, out of everyone she knew she was going to see when she went back she was most excited to see her brother. Sure she saw him as often as his studies allowed but he was going to be her safety blanket in New York and it had been over a week since she last saw him.

"He reached yesterday, went straight to bed," Lily said and Serena could picture her mother rolling her eyes at his lack of communication. "And he woke up so late, he better not be doing that in college."

"He's doing fine in college mom," Serena said shaking her head and sighing. "Just let him be."

"Well darling, he's much too young for me to 'just let him be'," she said and Serena bit down on her tongue to stop herself from asking where these thoughts where when Serena was a child and her mother just 'let her be'. "I guess I can't complain too much, he's been doing well."

Serena nodded on her side of the world with an expression on her face that said 'duh'. "When you see him, tell him thanks for letting me know he reached," she said sarcastically, her brother didn't even send her a text to let her know he was in New York.

"You'll probably be here by the time I see him," Lily said and Serena held her giggle in, her brother hated being in the presence of their mother and grandmother for too long, they always managed to say something to anger him, no matter how much he loved them, he just couldn't handle them. "Everyone is excited to see you."

"Really?" Serena asked sceptically, although she was curious about how everyone handled the news that she would be flying to New York to be with her mother and brother for her grandmother's funeral and wake. "Are you sure you told them that I was coming to visit?"

"Yes of course, Charles wanted to have a coming home party for you, you know how he is," Lily said and Serena winced at the way she said Charles, it was so loving and motherly, so different from the woman she and Erik were exposed to growing up. "I told him it would be rude to have a party so soon after the funeral but I'm sure they'll still do something."

"And um ... and Blair?" Serena asked tentatively, she knew everything that happened in New York through the papers and social media, she knew Blair and Chuck were married, she knew they had a beautiful little boy but she didn't know anything about her best friend anymore, she felt horrible for missing so much of their lives but she couldn't have any contact with New York if she wanted to start fresh the way she did when she left.

"I haven't spoken to Blair yet but I'm sure she's thrilled," Lily said faking excitement and Serena knew that when Blair was told she either had no reaction or she made her plans not to acknowledge Serena's existence known. "Darling the caterer is calling, don't miss you flight, love you."

"But," Serena said but the call was already cut, she didn't have time to ask about him. Nate Archibald, she wanted to know so much, what he said when they told him she was coming home, if he's single, if he'd still love her the way she still loved him, even after 13 years of no contact, she thought it would fade but it only burned stronger.

Serena sighed as she looked at her watch and then frowned she had more than enough time she didn't know what her mother was going on about. Serena straightened up her desk and grabbed her bag to make sure she had everything for her trip back home.

She checked off all the things she would need for this trip home in her mind, her heart beating rapidly every time she imagined seeing all the people she left behind. There were so many questions that they were going to ask and so many hard conversations she knew she had to get through and there was one secret that she was terrified of revealing, she knew it was time, it had been hidden much too long, but the fallout of her secret might destroy her.

She wasn't entirely sure how her grandmother knew the things that she did but Serena had learnt long ago to just accept that nothing she tried to keep from her grandmother ever stayed secret. The old woman knew everything. Serena wondered why she didn't say something before but with knowing all her secrets, her grandmother also knew that she never wanted to talk about it and Serena was ok with that.

The door flew open and Serena was ready to scream at the person who just barged into her office when the door was closed but she stopped short and smiled when she saw who it was.

"Come on mom, we gotta go," she said crossing her arms and staring her mother down, her blond hair hung in waves to her waist and her dark blue eyes challenging her mother. Serena could see that she wanted to stay as serious as possible but she was itching to jump in the spot because she was so excited. "The car's waiting and I want to go to New York, finally."

"I'm coming, I swear you and your grandmother could be the same person with the way you nag me," Serena said earning a glare from her daughter, she smiled zipping up her bag and locking her office. For the hundredth time since being handed that letter containing Cece's request that she tell everyone the truth and be in New York for her funeral, Serena cursed her grandmother, she hoped that this trip wasn't going to be a mistake, after all 13 was a bad-luck number.

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**A/N : Hey guys I'm back, its been a really long time since I've posted I know I know, I was supposed to be working on the sequel to 5 years later and state of grace and I pretty much got a paragraph and then got stuck so maybe soon when inspiration strikes I can get back to that **

**This story has been something I've wanted to do for a very very long time, I've had the idea almost from the moment I started writing GG fanfics but I was never really able to write it out until now, I have a basic plan for this story and I've written a few chapters ahead but I keep scraping and rewriting so hopefully by the time I get to those chapters I'm more sure of how it looks**

**Anyway for now I hope you guys really like the first chapter of this new story**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	2. Chapter 2

Serena smiled as she looked out the window to see New York below her, she was only 15 when she left and now she was 28 returning home, she glanced at her daughter who was asleep on her shoulder, headphones still plugged into her ears. Not for the first time since she was born Serena wondered if it would have been better had she come back home to raise her and then thought better of it.

Her grandmother lived in an up market area, it was quiet and people generally kept to themselves, the parties were sophisticated like Blair wished the ones at home where and not as wild as the ones she went to with Georgina. Serena lived her life differently there than she would have in New York where she knew she would have succumbed to the pressure of living up to expectations of that world and the tempting party scene that she was always drawn to.

She wondered if Gossip Girl was still a thing, she unsubscribed after she left, refusing to check in on what everyone was up to, she wondered if Blair and Chuck would have still gotten together had she stayed or if her mother would have married Bart or not. If she and Nate could have found their way to each other.

There were so many different possibilities and she was going to drive herself crazy thinking about them. The plane touched down and was moving toward their drop-off point when Serena woke her daughter up, first she tried flicking her nose to which the girl just batted her hand away and continued sleeping, Serena then tried calling her name to wake her up, all that got was a 'hmm' and another snore. Finally when the passengers stood to exit Serena did as well laughing when her daughters head fell from her shoulder and she jerked awake looking around wide eyed and shocked.

"Mom that was mean," she protested picking herself up and taking the bag Serena handed to her. "You could have just shook me awake."

"Where's the fun in that?" Serena asked laughing and the girl glared at her. "Oh don't give me that face."

"Do we really have to be here?" she asked looking up at Serena, she was excited to come to New York for such a long time but she had also picked up on Serena's hesitance, it was like she could sense a change coming and she wasn't sure that she wanted it.

"What happened to the girl who was pushing me out of my office because she wanted to come to New York?" Serena asked, laughing as her daughter scowled at her.

"I want to be here, I'm just not sure if you want to and that makes me nervous," she said looking up at Serena and shrugging.

"I want to be here," Serena said, not entirely sure how true that was. "Grams wanted us all here."

"Grams was also senile and she always had a drink in her hand," her daughter replied and Serena gasped and laughed, tapping the girl on her head lightly as they walked. "Ow."

"Watch it," she said still giggling as she threw her arm around the child. "She might just haunt you for saying that."

"I'm not five," she said rolling her eyes. "I don't believe in ghosts."

"Oh yeah?" Serena asked as they stopped by the carousel to wait for their bags. "So which 12 year old was it jumping into bed with me 2 weeks ago because, and I quote 'There's something under my bed'."

"12 and a half," she said crossing her arms and Serena laughed and shook her head. "And that was a bad dream, it could have happened to anyone."

"Sure it could have," she said and the little girl huffed. "Go get our bags before a ghost grabs it."

"That was just lame," she said squinting at Serena when she picked up the two bags and handed them to her mother. "Horribly lame."

"I'm a mother, I'm allowed some lameness," Serena said leading them out of the crowd toward the line of drivers with names on boards. "Arthur, I didn't expect you to be here."

"Mr Chuck insisted Miss van der Woodsen," he said with a smile when she recognised Chucks driver. "May I?"

"Oh of course," Serena said handing him the bags and grabbing her daughters hand to follow. "Where is Chuck?"

"He is at Miss Lily's," Arthur replied as curtly as ever, leading them out of the airport. "He said to take you straight there," he said it as a statement but there was a slight questioning tone to his voice as if he might have gotten the wrong instructions.

"That's fine, we'll be staying with my mother for the weekend," Serena replied as he opened the door and waited for them to enter. Serena pushed her daughter forward so she could get into the limo but she was amazed by the limo that she refused to budge. "Come on honey, we have to go."

"Oh yeah, sure," she said with wide eyes and Serena shook her head and laughed when she finally got in. "Mom we're going to Grandma Lily's in a limo."

"It's like you've never seen one before," Serena said as Arthur closed the door and got into the driver's seat, raising the partition before they left.

"Yeah for those big parties grams made us go to but never for coming home from the airport," she half whispered.

"He can't hear you," Serena whispered back.

"Fine, fine, but mom I'm used to town cars and juice boxes, this is a limo with scotch," she said opening the cabinet and pulling out a bottle.

"Scotch that you look at because the bottle is pretty not for opening and drinking," Serena told her putting the bottle back, she expected the eye roll to come but the little girl was much too excited to really care what her mother was saying. "This is how I used to go to school sometimes when Chuck was early enough."

"Seriously? And you left all this for public transport every morning," she asked looking at her mother like she was crazy.

"I had you to think about and I wouldn't change that decision, New York is where I grew up and I love it but there's so much more that I wanted for you than this fast paced, dramatic life," Serena said wrapping her arms around her daughter. "You'll see what I mean."

"Do you miss it?" she asked tilting her head to look back at Serena. "Did you ever want to move back?"

"I do miss it but I'll only ever move back if you want to," Serena said pressing a kiss to her daughters head.

"I don't know ..." she said trailing off and Serena shook her head.

"We're happy where we are, we don't need to move to New York," Serena told her. "Grams left that place to you, it's your home."

"But this is yours."

"Was," Serena said looking out the window at the buildings. "I don't live here anymore."

The little girl smiled up at her mother and nodded content to just gasp at all the sights that her mother saw all the time at her age. They travelled a lot, but New York was out of bounds mainly because Serena didn't want the temptation to uproot her new life and come back home but also because she was afraid of Blair and Nate and Chuck and their reactions to who she'd become and why she stayed away for so long.

When the limo finally stopped Serena took her daughters hands in hers, "I know that this weekend is going to be hard especially since these people are strangers to you, so if at any time you want to leave just say the word and we're gone, ok?" Serena asked cupping her daughter face. "Grams will understand."

"Ok, same to you," she said nodding and Serena smiled at her baby's thoughtfulness, turning around in time to find Arthur opening the door for them. "It's so pretty."

Serena took a deep breath as she looked up at the block of apartments her mother now lived in, smiling at the awe in her daughters eyes she grabbed her hand and they both entered the building.

"This way," the concierge said when Serena told him who they were here to see. He led them to the elevator and pressed the button to take them up to the floor.

"Are you excited?" Serena asked almost jumping in her heels, she didn't know what to expect.

In the past 13 years she saw Chuck once when her mother, Erik and Bart visited about a year into that marriage, they've spoken through the years but not enough to be considered close. She hasn't had contact with Blair or Nate, she knows they tried at first but she couldn't see them, she kept herself just out of their reach and finally they gave up. For the past 7 or 8 years she's seen her mother every few months, never less than once a year but never more than thrice either, the only person she can still say she knows and talks to regularly is Erik.

"Do you think they'll like me?" her daughter asked and Serena could hear the nerves in her girls voice. "Grandma Lily's boyfriend and your old friends."

"They will love you," Serena assured her kissing the top of her head. "Ready?"

"Serena darling you're here," Lily's voice floated to them as soon as the elevator doors opened. "I'm so glad you made it."

Serena hugged her mother and looked around her. "Hi mom, where is everyone?"

"They're in the next room waiting for you," Lily said holding Serena by her shoulders when someone else caught her attention behind Serena. "Oh, look at you, you've grown so much since I last saw you, I can't believe you're 12 now."

Serena pressed her lips together to hold back her laughter when her daughter rolled her eyes as her grandmother hugged her. She was 12 and a half and she wouldn't let Serena forget that, the half mattered because it was that much closer to 13 and anytime anyone tried to say otherwise she would get so annoyed.

"Hi Grandma Lily," she said hugging her back quickly and letting go even as Lily held on.

"I thought I heard my favourite girls," Erik said and Serena smiled, hugging her brother quickly before her daughter got to him.

"Uncle Erik," she screamed running full speed into his open arms. He grabbed her and spun her around before setting her on the ground, Serena loved that her baby was close to Erik, she knew her daughter needed a male figure in her life, and who better than the most perfect boy in her life, her brother. "I was hoping you'd be here."

"Someone had to come and keep an eye on you and make sure you don't get into any trouble," he said tapping her nose and she laughed at him.

"I never get into trouble," she said straightening herself up and making it seem as if she were the most proper lady.

"Sure you don't," Serena said and the little girl turned to stick her tongue out at her mom.

Serena didn't realise they had migrated to the other room until the other occupants stood up, she gasped when she saw Blair standing next to Chuck, looking like every bit of the confident woman and mother Serena always pictured her to be and Rufus, her mother's boyfriend smiling warmly at her from the side of the room. Blair and Chucks little boy, Henry was asleep in his father's arms.

"Hi," she said waving awkwardly.

"Serena," Chuck said smirking, he hadn't lost that confident look about him, it just looked strong now instead of creepy like it had in high school. Serena took a moment to look at the little boy in her step brothers arms, he was perfect, dark head of hair and pouty lips, he was so close to what she imagined Blair's child to one day be.

Rufus waved back at her and then moved toward Lily, Serena looked at Blair and Blair stared at her, both girls not really sure what to say to each other and neither wanting to make the first move.

"Are you both just going to stand there and look at each other or is someone going to say something?" Serena turned to glare at her daughter when she spoke, cursing her brother for being there because she knew that if he wasn't close to her, she wouldn't have had the courage speak so openly.

"Serena ..." Blair said a little confused as she took a step toward her former best friend, looking not at her but at the girl standing next to Erik. "Is that...?"

"Blair, meet my daughter," Serena said putting her arm around her daughters shoulders and pulling her closer so Blair could look at her better. "This is Summer Charlotte van der Woodsen."

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**A/N : I'm so thrilled with the response to this story! I honestly thought I'd just be writing this for myself and one or two other NS fans who still like to read GG fanfiction but you guys are all amazing, thank you so so much for the wonderful reviews**

**So I spent a long time with deciding on Summer's name but finally I recycled the name used in Misguided Ghosts and I'm pretty happy with it, I'm excited about this story :D**

**As always please let me know if there are any mistakes and if you'd like to see something happen in the story :P I'm sure you have some questions, all will be revealed shortly, for those who know my writing you know how impatient I am to get to the point lol thats why my longest story is 20 chapters and even then I rushed quite a bit lol **

**I might not update next week because I have to finish my assignments before I go to The Fray concert next Friday! So I'm super excited about that, you have no idea, I will try to edit the next chapter and update before I leave but if I don't get around to it, as soon as I get back home I will do so**

**I do not own any of the characters except Summer**

**Please review and I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter**

**Until next time (^^,)**


	3. Chapter 3

"Van der Woodsen?" Blair asked furrowing her eyebrows. "Where's her father?"

"Not in the picture," Serena said as Summer dropped her head to look to the floor, Serena bit her lip at the tone of Blair's voice and looked toward her brother. "Erik, why don't you show Summ her room."

"Yeah, come on kiddo," Erik said bending down to scoop his niece up and make her laugh as he took her away.

"That was tacky even for you Blair," Serena said crossing her arms over her chest and clenching her jaw. "Whatever problems you have are with me not her."

"You come back into our lives after more than 13 years, with a _daughter_ and you expect me not to ask?" Blair asked raising an eyebrow. "Besides I just wanted to know why she didn't take her father's surname."

"You have a beautiful son Blair," Serena said sighing as she changed the subject, she was not going to get into that tonight, not yet.

"Thank you," Blair said furrowing her eyebrows, the Serena she knew would have gone on the defensive, attacking her for saying what she did. But the girl in front of her, this Serena, she was a mother, she was different, mature, she looked exhausted but she still held the charm of the 15 year old that left them all those years ago. "How old is she?"

"She's 12 ... and a half," Serena said with a half smile as she thought of the trouble she'd get into if she didn't add that part in.

"Did you leave because you were pregnant?" Blair asked her, still trying to figure out who she was now. "Or did you fall pregnant after you left?"

"Can we not do this now Blair," Serena asked taking a deep breath. "It's been a long week and I'm exhausted and all I really want to do is get into bed after that flight."

Serena turned before Blair could say any more and walked away, she found Chuck in the hallway on his way back to Blair, Henry still asleep in his arms.

"You didn't tell her about Summer?" she asked him, Summer was about 4 when Chuck came to visit so it was hard to hide her from him, she asked him to keep it a secret but she never expected that he would.

"As far as everyone here knows, we haven't spoken in 13 years, I know how to keep a secret sis," Chuck said raising an eyebrow, he started calling her sis after their parents got married but they'd spoken so little over the years that she's still not used to it. "Isn't that what you wanted?"

"Yes it was, thanks," she said. "Blair might kill you for it though."

"Blair just needs to get used to having you back here, it took her a long time to get over the way you left and you know how long she can hold onto a grudge," he warned gently and Serena smiled in thanks.

"I know I hurt her, I thought I was protecting her," Serena said and Chuck looked at her skeptically but nodded. "How is ... he?"

"You'll see soon," Chuck said knowing exactly who she was talking about and Serena didn't think she had the mental capacity to think about any of that tonight. "Night sis."

Serena waited until Chuck was out of sight before going into the room and jumping onto the bed next to Erik and Summer.

"What are you guys up to?" she asked making herself comfortable.

"We're playing thumb wars," Summer said concentrating on what her thumb was doing. "Uncle Erik is cheating."

"Me? Cheat? Never," Erik said grinning. "Tell her S."

"Erik? Cheat? Never," Serena said playfully and Summer huffed as she narrowly missed her thumb being covered. "You're on your own kid, I'm going talk to mom for a bit."

Serena kissed her daughters head and poked Erik's side before leaving the room to find her mother. She found Lily and Rufus in the kitchen of all places cooking.

"Wow, who knew you'd be helping out in the kitchen?" Serena asked amused and Lily laughed and looked up at her.

"Well darling when you date someone who refuses to hire a chef, you just have to learn," she said finishing what she was doing and rinsing her hands before turning to Rufus. "We'll be at the table."

"This whole domestic thing seems to be working well for you," Serena said when they sat down and Lily smiled sadly. "He's nice."

"Oh he is, I think you'll like him," Lily said reaching out to take Serena's hands. "Erik loves him."

"Tell me about him," Serena said, she was curious to know what was going on in her mothers life, what this man was doing to keep her in one place that every other man she's ever been with couldn't do, her own children couldn't do.

"Well I met him after high school," Lily said folding her hands together and resting her chin on them. "I followed his band around the country."

"Mom," Serena exclaimed laughing. "I didn't know you were a groupie."

"I was not a groupie," Lily said almost repulsed. "I took pictures when they were on tour, it was for a magazine I free lanced for."

"So what happened," Serena asked, enjoying this carefree side of her mother that she never saw.

"There came a time where I had to choose whether to come back home and go to college like my family wanted or stay on the bus with him and enjoy the music," Lily said taking a breath as if she wishes she could change her decision. "As you know I chose to come home, it was one of the hardest decisions I had to make, then of course I met your father in college, he was so charming and I fell in love, well you know how that ended."

"I do," Serena said, the wonder and excitement of the story her mother was telling left her for that moment as she repressed the memories and pain of that time.

"Bart and I were happy for a while and then it just went downhill," Lily said drawing Serena out of her thoughts and back to the story. "I met Rufus, again, when I was thinking of getting a divorce and it was like we were never apart, he was going through his own divorce and he had his two kids to think about. Bart died before we could divorce and I'm sure he knew of my affair but I don't think he really cared."

"Chuck could not have been happy about it," Serena said, thinking of the boy she knew when she was growing up. He may be changed now but back then he was just a few years out of high school.

"Charles and I fought, oh he hated me, he refused to be in the same room as I was," Lily said shaking her head as she recalled that time. "He was always drunk, pushed everyone he knew as far away from him as possible, the things he would say, it was so evil."

"But you're so close now," Serena said almost confused, she envied the relationship Chuck had with her mother, she always thought that it was an instantaneous loving of each other, she didn't think there was such a back story.

"We are, I had to build that trust with him," Lily said smiling and Serena knew that smile, it was how she smiled when she spoke about her daughter. "He ended up needing me to help him overthrow Bart's brother and from then on I just kept proving to him that I wouldn't let him down until one day he started trusting me completely and I became the closest thing he had to a mother."

"The Chuck I see now and the one I knew back in high school, are two completely different people," Serena said with a small shrug. "I like the change."

"A lot of it was because of Blair, that girl just latched onto him and refused to let him out of her sight until she was positive he wasn't going to drown in the deep end he'd just gone off," Lily said laughing. "And somewhere in that struggle, they fell in love."

"What happened to her and Nate?" Serena asked a little timidly not that Lily would notice that, she desperately wanted to know about him but no-one wanted to hand her the information, she had to keep asking.

"Nathaniel and Blair broke up for reasons no-one actually knew," Lily said looking up as if the reason would come back to her. "One day they were fine and the next they refused to talk to each other and that was it, Chuck and I weren't close at this point and the only reason I ever knew about your friends is because I'd hear whispering's from school girls who couldn't really whisper."

"Mother, didn't anyone ever tell you not to eavesdrop," Serena asked and Lily rolled her eyes.

"I spoke to Blair a few times about it when she visited Chuck, since you were gone and she and Nate were over, he was the only one she could talk to," Lily said trying to remember. "I know she told me they just weren't going to work out and it had taken her too long to realize that and he was the one who really ended it but she didn't elaborate on that."

"I wonder what it was," Serena said wincing at the thought of Nate telling Blair what had happened between them and if maybe that added to the anger Blair threw her way earlier.

"It must have been something big," Lily told her smiling at Rufus when he set down a tray of tea and pouring two cups for them. "They were such a perfect couple, Anne and Eleanor had their lives planned too, but now she's with Chuck and we have Henry and oh Serena when you see him awake tomorrow, he's such a sweet child, you'll just adore him."

Serena smiled sadly and looked down at her tea, her heart clenched in her chest as she thought of how her mother spoke of Henry and how she barely bothered to get to know Summer, how she didn't want her. It was feelings that she had long ago dealt with but she couldn't help the jealousy that bubbled up.

"Serena darling, you always say that you don't know who Summers father is but you have to have some idea," Lily pressed and Serena pressed her lips together to hold in a snippy comment that she knew would not help anyone. "After all, you fought me to keep her."

"I don't want to talk about this now," Serena said taking a breath.

Her mother looked at her, ready to argue her case as Summers grandmother. "But-"

"Tea," Summer exclaimed moving to sit on her mother's lap, even though she was much too big, so she could help herself to what was on the table. Lily looked at Serena to let her know that she wasn't done with this conversation and Serena hid her face in Summers hair. "Ahh too hot."

"Thumb wars are only fun for a little while," Erik said coming to sit with them.

"You're just saying that because you lost," Summer said smiling wide and sticking her tongue out at him before ducking behind Serena's hair when Erik glared at her.

"Enough you two," Serena said when Erik stuck his tongue out as well. "Erik you're a grown man."

"She started it," he said huffing and Serena rolled her eyes wondering how her grown brother could be this childish, in a way she always thought of Erik as her kid even though he was her brother, her dad left when he was just a few months old, their mom shortly after and Serena had stepped up to take on the role of mom for him especially being 7 years older, she raised him as well as she could, ignoring whatever nannies her mother might have sent, until she had her own baby and he chose to go to boarding school but he spent every holiday with her, she was always the first person he went to if he needed to talk, Summer and Erik acted like brother and sister most times instead of Uncle and niece and it felt right to her. "What are you guys talking about?"

"Mom was taking me down memory lane," Serena said resting her chin on her daughters head. "Filling me in on what's been happening."

"We'll go onto Gossip Girl later," Erik said pouring himself a cup of tea and Serena looked up at him shocked. "Yeah I know, I didn't think it would last that long either."

"Who's Gossip Girl?" Summer asked raising an eyebrow.

"No-one knows, it was an anonymous blog someone created when I was in High School, nothing for you to worry about," Serena told her, she glanced up at Erik and he smiled, they knew what they were going to be doing tonight.

* * *

**A/N : Hey guys heres a new chapter yey, hope you're still enjoying the story :D I've been writing as far ahead as I can and I've changed it so many times that when I re-read this chapter I got a little lost lol but please let me know what you guys think of it, Nate will make his appearance in the next chapter I think, the timeline here is a bit different from the show but I'll keep it as close as possible, just changing the things I have to.**

**So I went to see The Fray live last Friday and it was amazing, my cousins and I were in the back of an open van and it was freezing to get to the place and my hair was an absolute disaster when we finally arrived but it was worth it haha, those guys are absolutely incredible, their songs and the atmosphere and ah everything was perfect, I love The Fray! Do you guys like them? What bands do you listen to?**

**Ok back to the story lol, let me know what you think and if you want to see something specific that I can add, I've been watching alot of NS scenes online and I miss them so so so much **

**Anyway please review**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	4. Chapter 4

"I thought you'd be sleeping," Erik said sitting next to his sister and looking at the screen she had open, he was supposed to stay up with her to go through the Gossip Girl posts but he fell off to sleep early. "How far back did you go?"

"I just wanted to see what I missed," Serena mumbled going to the next post. "I started from around the time I left, the posts start fading when they were in college and then just stops at the wedding."

"The posts started fading after Gossip Girl realized she wasn't going to find you," Erik told her, he was surprised to see the site still up when he googled it for fun, he remembered how his sister hated getting texts alerting her to a Gossip Girl post when she was in High School, he still didn't know why someone would target her but then again he didn't think he ever wanted to understand a teenage girls mind. "Well she knew where you were but no-one had any pictures or news, it was like you weren't getting into any trouble anymore and after a while everyone else's lives just got too boring for her."

"How do you know all this?" Serena asked and Erik shrugged.

"I talk to Chuck sometimes," he said like it explained everything.

"Well she documented Chuck, Blair and Nate's life enough for me to have an idea of what's been happening since I've been gone," she says closing the site and putting her laptop away.

"So what did you find out?" Erik asked leaning back on the couch and staring up at the ceiling.

"Most of the posts are about Chuck and Blair, their relationship seemed to shock Gossip Girl as well," Serena said giggling. "They were always on the same wavelength with the scheming and stuff, it's really not that big of a surprise if you think about it."

"I don't remember," Erik said shrugging and Serena nodded. "It was only after high school that I came back here."

"You were in boarding school since you were 8," Serena said almost gasping at the fact that she let that happen, Summer was 12 now and she couldn't imagine sending her away. "You should have stayed with me."

"And Grandma?" Erik asked raising an eyebrow at her. "No thanks, you had a good relationship with her, she just scared me."

"You would have gotten used to her," Serena said laughing as she thought of how her brother and grandmother refused to get along, she was obsessive when it came to cleanliness and proper behaviour and Erik was a little boy who wanted to dig around in the dirt and refused to sit still for any period of time.

"Maybe, but I don't regret going to boarding school," Erik told her. "Besides you had to deal with Summer, I didn't think protecting your little brother was something you should have had to deal with too."

"But I like protecting you," Serena said teasing and Erik laughed and nudged her. "Well at least I see you every weekend now."

"What did you find out about Nate," Erik asked, knowing that was what his sister was looking for.

"Not as much as I hoped for," Serena said sighing. "He kept the lowest profile, there were posts about him and Blair together and then little posts trying to figure out why they broke up, Gossip Girl said he cheated and then him with Chuck and Blair at their wedding in that final post, with another 'Where is she?' heading."

"I haven't seen much of him since I've been here," Erik says. "I know he's Henry's godfather."

"Chuck just said I'll see soon," Serena said sighing. "And mom didn't even speak about him, I don't know how to feel about this lack of information from the one person I actually want to know about."

"S, I know you really want to know about Nate," he says carefully. "Is there a reason why?"

"He's just the only person I don't know about," Serena said standing up. "I'm going to sleep, I'm going to show Summer New York and all our old hang outs tomorrow, you should come."

Serena kisses the top of his head and goes to her room and gets under the covers when she feels her bed dip and someone snuggle up behind her.

"You're supposed to be asleep," she said turning to let Summer rest her head on her shoulder.

"I was waiting for you," the little girl said. "Couldn't sleep alone."

"Scared of the ghosts," Serena asked teasing her and she could feel her girl frown.

"Moooooooom," she whined sleepily. "Who was the lady that asked about my dad?"

"Blair, she was my best friend," Serena said, wishing she hadn't hurt Blair as badly as she knew she had. "We were friends since we were babies."

"She's kinda mean," Summer said shrugging and Serena shook her head and smiled.

"She's just angry that I left without saying goodbye," Serena said rubbing Summers back lightly. "Once she gets over it, you will love her."

"Did you leave because of me?" Summer asked softly and Serena felt her daughter's body tense at the thought of being the reason for her mother uprooting her life.

"No, I made the decision to leave before I knew," Serena said honestly. "When I found out about you it made me sure about my decision."

Summer nodded against Serena and Serena could tell sleep was finally taking over. "Do you know who my dad is?" came the whispered question the little girl never asked before and Serena was naively hoping she never would.

"Yes," Serena said softly, she didn't want to keep this from her daughter any longer, she couldn't, when no response came, Serena looked down to see her fast asleep and she laughed, of course her daughter would ask such an important question and then fall asleep before she heard he answer.

She always maintained that she didn't know who Summers father was but she did, she knew from the moment they told her she was pregnant and she couldn't imagine not going through with that pregnancy. She didn't want anyone to tell him about Summer, she didn't want to risk losing her baby. As the years went by she found it easier to just say that she had no idea and people came up with their own theories, at first they made her angry but most the time they were so far away from the truth that Serena could live with it.

* * *

"Mom look," Summer squealed throwing more bread into the water where the ducks were fast approaching her. "There are so many of them."

"Blair's house keeper, Dorota, used to bring us here to feed the ducks when Blair was having a bad day," Serena said smiling as she handed her over excited 12 year old the rest of the bread in her hands. "It became a tradition even after we got old enough to bring ourselves here when she was upset."

"What did you do when you were having a bad day?" Summer asked smiling widely when the ducks started eating what she'd thrown to them. "You said this was Blair's thing, what was your thing?"

"Urm well, another friend of ours, Nate," Serena said smiling automatically when she said his name. "I'd usually call him and we'd go for ice-cream to this shop that was open 24 hours and we used to talk about silly things until I felt better."

"Am I going to meet him?" Summer asked and Serena nodded and looked back out at the water. "I feel like having ice-cream."

"We can take a walk to the shop when we find Uncle Erik," Serena said laughing at her scatter brained girl. "It's close by, I wonder if it's still open."

"Where did you live before you went to LA?" Summer asked curiously and Serena smiled, she was all questions today, every place they went to sparked alot of questions about her childhood and stories that she'd long forgotten. "Howcome I don't know this already?"

"Because it never came up, come on let's start walking, I'll tell Erik to meet us there," Serena said sending a quick message to Erik while Summer said her goodbyes to the ducks. "We can come back later."

"Can we get a duckling?" she asked and Serena shook her head no, there was no way she was getting a duck as a pet. "Please, please, please, please."

"You can't take care of a goldfish, what makes you think you can take care of a duck?" Serena asked throwing her arm around Summer and pulling her close as they walked.

"Goldfish are too needy," Summer said waving them off. "I just need to throw some food in for the ducks and they'll be fine."

"You couldn't do that for the fish," Serena said incredulously and Summer frowned. "You'll be bored with it within a week, no ducks, maybe a dog, I wouldn't mind a dog, I'll take care of it if you forget."

"Grams would scold us if she could hear us talking about taking a dog into her house, although she'd probably scream louder for the duck," Summer said giggling and Serena smiled, her grandmother was not an animal person, too messy and too needy, she always said. "I miss her."

"I know you do baby," Serena said pressing a kiss to the top of her daughters head. "I do too."

"Why are we stopping?" Summer asked clearing her throat when her mother pulled her to a stop.

"My old room used to be right up there," Serena said from the spot where she could clearly see the building where she used to live. "I had an amazing view of the park and if you just turn a little and look right up to the penthouse, that is where Blair used to live, those where the two places I spent most of my time at when I wasn't at school."

"Mom we need to go see your school," Summer exclaimed and Serena laughed and nodded.

"We need to?" Serena asked, and Summer nodded enthusiastically as they continued walking. She wanted to visit the school as well, just to see how much they'd changed over the last decade but she didn't need to.

"Yes, I want to see where you went," Summer said. "Is it like my school?"

"It's a school, they're all pretty similar," Serena said thinking about the school Summer went to. "Except our classes were split, the girls went to Constance Billard and the boys to St. Jude's but we shared the same courtyard and sports grounds."

"Do you think your old teachers will still be there?" Summer asked bouncing as she walked alongside Serena.

"Doubtful," Serena said thinking back to her old high school. "They were all old bats, probably all retired or dead by now."

"Mom," Summer exclaimed giggling. "You aren't allowed to scold me if I ever tease my teachers."

"Probably should have thought about that before I said it," Serena said slapping her forehead dramatically.

"There you guys are," Erik called and both girls spun around to find him coming toward them with three huge pretzels. "Best pretzels in New York, or so the board says."

"Food," Summer said like she hadn't eaten in such a long time and Serena shared a look with Erik before taking her pretzel from her brother.

"What did you feed her?" he asked looking from his niece to his sister.

"Nothing," Serena said and Summer glared at her uncle. "We were actually going to go for ice-cream at that place between our old apartment and the townhouse."

"She doesn't need any more sugar," Erik said throwing his arm around Summers neck and pulling her to him. "She's hyper enough."

"When in New York," Serena said rolling her eyes because as the parent, she was supposed to stop the sugar and Erik was supposed to sneak it to her.

"That's when in Rome S," Erik told her and Serena glared at him, she knew the phrase. "Why are we taking her all the way there?"

"Because that's where mom and her friend, Nate used to go when she was feeling sad," Summer informed him and Erik raised an eyebrow.

"Really?" Erik asked staring at Serena knowingly and she shook her head at him.

"Yep, let's go," Summer said enthusiastically grabbing Erik's hand and leading him in the direction they were going toward before like she knew exactly where she was going.

"Serena?" a confused voice called and Serena whipped her head around quickly, she squinted as the glare of the sun hit her and then gasped because the boy they were just talking about was making his way to them. "I can't believe it's really you."

Summer turned sharply when Serena grabbed her hand and she and Erik frowned at Serena for a moment before looking to where she was looking, some guy was coming toward them, Erik and her mom seemed to know who he was but she was confused.

"Nate," Serena breathed out, a smile gracing her face at seeing him and finally it felt like she was home.

* * *

**A/N : Yeah I know I know but there's more of Nate in the next chapter hehe I feel like I'm dragging this story a little or trying to anyway, I've added a few filler chapters that makes the story that much longer, if you guys find that too annoying let me know but I'm enjoying focusing on other things before getting to the main point of the story, if that makes any sense at all**

**The vampire diaries season 6 is coming out tonight and I don't really know how to feel about it, on the one hand I want to see Paul Wesley, on the other most of the last 2 seasons made want to just stop watching **

**Anyway enough of my ramblings, I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, please review and let me know what you think**

**Until Next Time(^^,)**


	5. Chapter 5

"You're back, in New York," Nate said taking her in. "When did you get here?"

"I landed yesterday," Serena said letting go of Summers hand and taking a small step closer, bringing her arms across her body so she could hold her elbows. "It's been a while."

"13 years, give or take a few months," Nate said smiling. "You look good."

"So do you," Serena said biting her lip, he was older, different, confidant, the past 13 years were good to him. Serena looked down to find his hands stuffed in his pocket and sighed because she couldn't see his left ring finger, while her bare finger was on display.

"You're Nate?" Summer asked piping up from behind her, Nate nodded glancing over to her and Serena froze forgetting that her daughter and brother were right there. "We're going to the ice-cream shop you used to take my mom to when she was sad, do you wanna come?"

"Mom?" Nate asked, his eyes snapping from Serena, back to the little girl that stepped up to stand next to her, looking at her properly. "You have a daughter?"

"Yeah," Summer said slowly like the fact that she called Serena mom should have been obvious. "Summer van der Woodsen, nice to meet you."

"van der Woodsen?" Nate repeated her surname wearily shaking the girls outstretched hand and giving Serena a bewildered look. "Nathaniel Archibald, nice to meet you too."

"I don't think I can say that name," Summer said thinking about it.

"It's ok, you can just call me Nate," he said smiling at the girl, who reminded him of Serena when she was younger. "Only my mother and Chuck call me Nathaniel anyway."

"So do you wanna come with us?" she asked grinning and Serena gently cupped her arm so Summers attention will go to her.

"Summ, I'm sure Nate has other things to do today than sight-see with us," Serena said nervously finding her voice again and Erik snorted. "Maybe next time."

Nate looked at her curiously but nodded his head. "I am meeting someone here now but that place is still open and still awesome, you should check it out, maybe next time I can come with," Nate said before turning toward Erik. "Little Erik van der Woodsen, last time I saw you, you were 8 years old and trying to get into the candy cupboard."

"Oh yeah I remember that," Erik said laughing at his need to have anything sweet when he was a child, it didn't matter where it was he would find it and get to it. "How've you been Nate?"

"Good, good, how long are you in town for?" Nate asked, his attention back on Serena, occasionally flickering to Summer.

"Just for the week and if Summer here decides she wants to stay for the rest of her vacation then we'll see," Serena said tugging on the girls hair and Summer squished her nose.

"Well I should leave you guys to carry on," Nate said stopping when someone came to stand next to him. "Hey," he said kissing the new woman and Serena swallowed and waited for the pain in her chest to pass. "Guys this is my girlfriend Lola, Lola this is Serena, Erik and Summer."

"Hi," Lola said smiling at them tightly and then looking to Nate before walking away.

"She's having a bit of a crises, we'll see you guys tomorrow," Nate told them before turning and sprinting off to where Lola was still walking away from them.

"Well she was rude," Summer said and both Serena and Erik turned to look at her. "What? You were both thinking it."

"Come on kid, let's go get you that ice-cream," Erik said touching his sisters shoulder as he walked with his niece.

Serena stood for another moment watching Nate and Lola's retreating backs and she sighed, it's not as if this weekend was going to be complicated enough, now there was a familiar looking girlfriend involved.

For a moment Serena was focused solely on trying to figure out where she knew Lola from and then it all stopped as her heart caught up with her brain and all those feelings for Nate she thought would fade once she saw him burned just as bright as they had when she was 15 and trying not to love her best friends boy. When she looked at him he was all she saw, no-one else existed, he looked happy to see her, she thought he might be like Blair but he was fine, probably because he had Lola and he'd moved on while she ran away, had a daughter and couldn't move on because she couldn't let him go.

When they were finally out of sight Serena turned and walked faster to catch up with her daughter and brother, wrapping an arm around Summer's arm and holding onto her for comfort like she'd done since the girl was born.

"Mom?" Summer asked looking down at the way her mom was holding her hand and then up at her frazzled mother. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah honey I'm fine," Serena said squeezing Summer's arm gently and looking away. Summer gave her a quizzical look before turning back to Erik and continued trying to tell him all the reasons her mom should get her a duck as a pet.

* * *

"What's the story with you and Nate," Summer asked once they were back at Lily's, relaxing in Serena's room, Serena shot Summer a surprised look and wondered how long she was itching to ask that question. "Well when you make it that obvious, you can't expect me not to notice."

"She does have a point," Erik commented and Serena glared at him but kept her mouth shut so Summer turned to Erik. "I was still a kid so I might have this all wrong but Nate was at the house all the time, not only when Blair was there and Blair was his girlfriend at the time."

"Really? Wasn't she your best friend?" Summer asked and Serena put her hand over her face. "Mom, no wonder she was so mean to you."

"Erik you are doing a horrible job of telling this story," Serena said tilting her head to the side and looking at Summer. "The three of us were best friends since we were in diapers, he and Blair started dating when we were young but they were both my best friends, I gossiped with Blair and goofed off with Nate."

"The sexual tension did not look like goofing off," Summer grumbled and Erik burst out laughing while his sister stared at her daughter. "What'd I say?"

"Where did you even learn that?" Serena asked having another moment where she realized her kid was not a baby anymore.

"Lauren says it all the time," Summer said waving it off.

"Remind me again, who is Lauren?" Erik asked, still laughing at his sisters expense.

"Red head, had a major crush on you," Serena replied and Erik winced. "Still does, I think."

"You should stay away from that girl," he said shivering. "She creeps me out."

"Seriously though mom, you and Nate," Summer asked staring at her mother and Serena sighed and looked away.

"Like you said he was my best friends boyfriend," Serena said shaking her head. "And I left before a possibility of something could happen."

"I don't believe you," Summer said squinting at her mother and pointing to her eyes. "It was all in the eyes, there was and still is something there."

"Yes and now that something is Lola," Serena said and Summer's shoulders dropped and she frowned at the mention of Lola. "She looks familiar."

"You know her?" Erik asked raising an eyebrow. "Coz I got that feeling too but we only saw her for a second so I couldn't be sure."

"Yeah maybe it's just my mind playing tricks on me," Serena said sighing. "We should probably get some sleep before tomorrow."

"Mom wants us up early," Erik said and Summer groaned. "Rufus' kids are gonna be here in the morning to meet us."

"Well as long as they aren't anything like Clause with a C's kid, I think we'll be fine," Serena grumbled, he was a teenager and she was about 10 and he tormented her and blamed everything on her and of course her mother took her boyfriend's word over her daughters.

"I don't remember him," Erik said, scratching his chin.

"You were like 2 or 3 and we only met him twice," Serena said shaking her head, it was about the same amount of times they'd met Claus.

"Who's Claus?" Summer asked, curiously when no-one actually mentioned who he was to them. "And why do you say with a C."

"Clause with a C, his name starts with a C, was grandma Lily's first long term boyfriend after she and my dad divorced," Serena said laughing. "Klaus with a K was her second or third husband, I forget the order."

"Wow she's been married alot," Summer said scrunching her nose.

"Yeah she has but don't let her hear you say that," Erik told them getting up to leave the room and switching the light off. "G'Night."

* * *

The next morning went fairly well, she met Dan and Jenny the next morning and Dan's fiancé, Vanessa and learned way more than she needed to about how they were in the same school from Dan's rambling, Vanessa eventually stopped him but Serena didn't mind, he wasn't that bad.

He was a writer, Vanessa was a film maker and Jenny was a fashion designer or just a seamstress now but she was working for it, it all seemed so exciting compared to Serena's office job that she took over a few years ago. She always wanted to get into modelling and photography like her mother, she even took a few courses in photography but she was never really sure so when Cece got sick she was more than happy to take over.

It was a short service, with the bare minimum people in attendance. Serena wasn't sure that was what her grandmother would have wanted but her mother assured her it was.

Chuck stayed close to Lily and Blair close to him, her mother's sister Carol was there as well which Serena thought was weird since she'd never seen the woman before aside from pictures, she didn't go to her mother's after so Serena didn't get the chance to talk to her. Nate was at the back, away from everyone with Lola. He caught her eye a few times and smiled comfortingly. Serena had Summer glued to her side for as long as she could, the only way she felt she was going to get through the day was if she was there, her comfort blanket.

Most people came straight to the house afterward, some gasping when they saw her, some whispering and pointing, some people looked at her like she was just a memory, all she was expecting, all the while hoping that Summer didn't notice.

"This dress itches," Summer said trying to adjust her dress as inconspicuously as possible coming to stand next to her mother when they were back at Lily's apartment. "Can't I go change?"

"Grandma Lily wants to show you off a little first," Serena told her, watching as her daughter tried to scratch her back but her hand wasn't reaching. "Would you stop that?"

"I don't know why she's showing me off now when she didn't the last 12 years," Summer mumbled as Serena discreetly found the pin that was giving Summer so many problems and pulled it out.

"I wouldn't take it personally, Summ," Serena said patting her daughters back when she was done. "But if you really want to complain to someone, Uncle Erik is standing right there."

"Hey look Nate's here," Summer piped up with a huge smile on her face and Serena's heart started working overtime and she looked up to find Nate and a very frustrated looking Lola walk in. "Oh and look, he brought her."

"You could try to sound a little more sincere," Serena said nudging her daughter and Summer just shrugged, and Serena beamed with pride, yeah that was her kid.

Blair caught Serena's eye a few seconds later and she smiled but not one of those genuine Blair smiles that she missed so much, this was a smile Blair had saved specifically for when she was up to something and she knew a secret that no-one wanted her to know. Serena took a deep breath and held it in for a moment as Blair's eyes flickered to Summer and her heart sank.

"Honey, I'm going outside, go stand by Erik or Jenny if you don't want to be alone," Serena said, Summer and Jenny became easy friends that morning and she always wanted to trouble Erik. Summer looked up at her mother curiously and Serena shook her head. "I'm fine, I just need some fresh air."

As soon as Summer left her side Serena fled the room, the look in Blair's eyes wasn't one she wanted to see until she spoke to her family but it told her everything. She knew.

* * *

**A/N : Hey guys heres the next update yey lol I know theres still not an over load of Nate but he's finally in the story now haha**

**Thank you for all the wonderful reviews, I love reading your comments of the way I'm writing this, I know there are a few people that aren't that happy about the speed of this but just bare with me, I'll get to the point eventually lol**

**Guys I have written a chapter or 2 ahead of this but now I'm stuck, so if the next few chapters come out a little slower I apologize, theres alot that I need to think about to make sure it gets to the end properly**

**Please review and let me know what you think**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	6. Chapter 6

Serena stepped out onto the balcony and dropped to the floor as soon as she got the sliding door closed, her heart was beating wildly and her legs were jelly and she was cursing her dead grandmother for wanting everything to be in New York. She shouldn't have come back here, she and Summer could have done something in LA, New York was filled with memories and heartbreak and an irrational need to be more.

She let out a fast breath of air as she thought about what she was going to do, she really wanted to just pull Summer out of New York as fast as possible and forget this weekend ever happened but she knew that wasn't possible. Her grandmother had a backup plan to reveal secrets Serena knew needed to be told if she herself chickened out. The fact that she knew Blair knew, meant that she was out of time to be the one to tell her loved ones what she needed to.

There was a noise from the side of her and she looked over to see little Henry peeking out of her mother's room entrance to the balcony to look at her, hiding his face when she looked at him. Serena smiled and looked away again, watching the little boy look at her again from the corner of her eye and giggle when he was caught. She played the game with him a few more times before scooting closer and waiting for him to come to her.

"Hi I'm Serena," she said smiling at him. "What's your name?"

"Henry," he said softly.

"That's a very nice name," Serena said and the little boy smiled. "How old are you Henry?"

He seemed to think about it for a moment before holding up his hand and spreading his fingers so she could see them.

"Five?" she asked and he nodded. "Really?"

"Mommy says I'm small for my age," he told her when she looked at him sceptically. "Who are you?"

"I am Grandma Lily's daughter," Serena told him, remembering her mother telling her what he called her and Henry looked up at her confused. "I was your mom and dad's friend when they were little."

"Really?" he asked sitting up straighter and gasping. "You knew them when they were my age?"

"Yep, we used to have a lot of fun," Serena told him.

"Do you know Uncle Nate too?" he asked and Serena smiled automatically.

"Yes, I did," she said clearing her throat. "The four of us were very good friends."

"I never saw you before," Henry said looking very confused.

"I've been away for a long time," Serena said smiling.

"Are you back now?" he asked and Serena let out a breath.

"No," she told him gently. "I'm just here for a little while and then I have to go back home."

"Oh ok," he said looking down at the floor and Serena wanted to tell him that she'd stay for him. This little boy had never met her before but he sounded so sad to know that she was going to leave.

"Henry, there you are," a voice came from behind them and Serena tensed, looking outward to the city. "Come on buddy, your moms looking everywhere for you."

"I found your friend Uncle Nate," Henry told him proudly getting up from his spot next to Serena and walking to his uncle. "And she said she was mommy and dad's friend too."

"Really?" Nate said feigning surprise and the little boy nodded yes. "Why don't you go find your mom and tell her all about it? She's in the lounge where you're supposed to be."

"Ok," he said as Nate dusted the dust from the little boys pants. "Bye Serena."

"Bye Henry," she said turning back to wave at him before he scampered off to find Blair. "He's adorable."

Yeah he is," Nate said coming to sit next to her. "Chuck and Blair's pride and joy."

"Chuck and Blair," Serena said laughing to herself and thinking about who they were now and who they used to be when she knew them. "How did that happen?"

"Well ... I really have no idea," Nate said chuckling and scratching his head. "It just happened and I think everyone was against it, even they were against it but they couldn't fight it and it was probably the best thing that could have happened."

"Don't get me wrong, I love what I've seen so far of Chuck and Blair but I guess I just always thought you and B would still be together," Serena mentioned because that formed such a big reason to why she stayed away all these years and Nate shrugged as if she was missing something. "You don't agree?"

"Henry seems pretty taken by you," Nate said changing the subject and Serena sighed and shook her head, both relieved and annoyed at not getting an answer. "He doesn't usually like new people."

"I'm pretty sure that if Blair had her way Henry would be throwing dirt at my face every time he saw me," Serena mumbled looking away from him and Nate laughed.

"She's just mad that you haven't spoken to her in years and hurt that you avoided her when she tried to reach out," Nate told her. "Blair Waldorf-Bass does not forgive easily."

"She never has," Serena said sighing.

"She forgave me for our break-up," Nate said scratching the back of his head. "Just give her some time and have one of those famous Blair and Serena fights and it'll be like no time has passed at all."

"I wish it were that easy," Serena said looking at Nate. "It's been over a decade, there is so much for us to fight about that I don't think it would be resolved until we're grandparents."

"There's that," Nate said. "You're also both mothers and 13 years more mature than the last time you had problems so maybe it will be resolved faster than that."

"You still have that undying optimism," Serena commented and Nate laughed and dropped his head slightly. "I thought after everything that happened to you, you might have lost it."

"How do you know what happened to me?" Nate asked.

"Gossip girl," Serena told him and he rolled his eyes and shook his head, that was one thing he was glad to be rid of. "And I might have googled you once or twice," she admitted sheepishly.

"That would have turned up some interesting stuff," Nate confirmed bobbing his head up and down as he nodded, his family was all over the news for what seemed like years at one point. "Since I couldn't google you, what have we missed, besides the fact that you have a daughter."

"Summer," Serena said with a smile. "She's basically been my life since I found out about her, there's really nothing else to tell."

"Really?" Nate asked tapping his chin like he was thinking of something. "Did you study after school?"

"I did a few photography courses nothing too long," Serena told him grinning. "You?"

"Grandfather decided on law," Nate said frowning at the choice. "I didn't actually have any other career paths in mind so I went with it."

"I took over from my grandmother in Rhodes Corp," Serena said and Nate looked at her impressed. "I don't do much, I just make sure no-one screws up."

"Still that's a pretty big position," Nate said nodding and Serena smiled and blushed. "What happened to photography?"

"I had to travel alot and I couldn't do that to Summer," Serena told him shrugging, she didn't regret it but sometimes she wondered if Summer would have been fine tagging along when her mother travelled. "What happened to sailing the world on 'The Charlotte'?" she countered.

"Have you met my grandfather?" Nate asked and they both laughed, Serena never knew how anyone said no to that man. "I still go sailing sometimes, clear my head."

"I remember planning the places we would visit on your world tour, because of course I would be there too, I remember we planned it for the year after high school, we were going to take a gap year," Serena said giggling and Nate nodded. "And then Blair would tell us that there was no way that would happen because if we took a year of we would never get back to studying."

"She was right," Nate said thinking about it, it was hard enough getting back into study mode after the holiday before school started, he didn't want to think how much harder it would have been if he took a year of studying. "As usual."

"It was nice to dream," Serena said taking a deep breath and sighing, she dreamt about that made up trip alot when she was younger.

"So, no husband?" Nate asked nudging her and Serena rolled her eyes, that was as subtle as Nate got. "Or bad boy boyfriend?"

"Bad boy boyfriend?" Serena repeated laughing. "I didn't only date bad boys."

"I distinctly remember the guy with the bike," Nate said and Serena shook her head, that guy was an artist and aside from the bike he was annoyingly good. "And that one with all the tattoos," he said and Serena made a face, she couldn't disagree with that one. "And of course, Carter Baizen."

"I think Chuck could have killed me for that one," Serena said and Nate agreed, Carter was not Chuck's favourite person in the world so when someone from his closest group of friends started dating him, Chuck was furious. "If I remember correctly, you were a fan of his."

"He was like this cool older guy who gave me weed," Nate said laughing, Carter and Serena's relationship, if you could call whatever they had one, definitely changed the way Nate looked at him. "I haven't heard from him since you left, did you run away with him?"

"He's not Summer's father if that's what you're hinting at," Serena said laughing at him, she would have loved for Carter to been her escape but when she cut ties with New York, he was cut too. "What about you? And Lola, when did that happen?"

"Lola?" Nate asked like he didn't remember who she was talking about and then cleared his throat because that was an awkward slip of memory. "Yeah, she was working as a cater waiter at one of Blair's parties, Blair almost had a fit when she saw me helping her."

"Yes Nate you were a guest," Serena said mockingly and Nate glared at her. "You're not supposed to get your hands dirty."

"_Anyway_ we found out she was working that job until she was done studying that year, she's pretty cool," Nate said thinking of things to say. "Not at all like what you saw the other day."

"You said it was a crises," Serena remembered, raising an eyebrow at him. "Everything sorted out?"

"I'm not entirely sure," Nate said looking at her as if to judge her reaction to what he was saying. "Her mother is back in town-"

"You don't have to say anymore," Serena said cutting him off, when her mother came to LA to see them she was also on edge and tight-lipped all the time. "I can relate."

"I still can't believe you're back after all these years," Nate told her. "You know at first when you left I was so angry, especially after the way we left it and what was said, then when I realized you weren't coming back I was sad and a little scared and when we tried looking for you and you avoided us I was angry again but that had a lot to do with Summer, didn't it?"

"It did," Serena said sucking in a sharp breath. "It's not that I didn't want to see you and Blair because I missed you so much, it's just that there was so much more at stake and I didn't know how to deal with it, I still don't."

"I'm just ... After all that wondering about where you were and what was going on with you, I'm just really glad you're ok," he told her and Serena blinked back tears because she was expecting all kinds of anger from him. "That wasn't supposed to make you cry."

"I know, I ... You're too good Nate," she said softly wiping her eyes and shivering as she thought about the news she was about to deliver. "I have to tell you something about the time I left and you can't hate me, ok?"

"Serena?" Nate said her name slowly and curiously, standing up because she did and waiting for her to speak.

"Just promise me you won't hate me," she said letting out another breath and Nate furrowed his eyebrows but nodded because t looked like that's what she needed to continue. "I was going to come back to New York, I was ready to face everything that happened but then I got sick and when my grandmother took me to the doctor I found out I was pregnant and I decided then that I was going to keep the baby and I couldn't come back home and no-one could know about her."

"I know this Serena," Nate said almost reaching out to her but she continued to pace, not even registering the worry on his face.

"Nate the baby I had, Summer," Serena said swallowing and telling herself again that this needed to happen. "She's your daughter."

"What?" Nate asked, but the voice that overlapped his was younger and much higher. Serena spun around to see Summer staring at them with wide eyes and her jaw hanging open.

* * *

**A/N : dun dun dun ... Hey guys here's chapter 6, a little later than I would have wanted it but I was studying and posting fanfiction just completely slipped my mind**

**This chapter was sort of a starting point when I started this story but it was completely different, for one thing Nate was a very angry person in the original draft and when I read through it again I just hated it so I rewrote everything, added them meeting him at Central Park in the last chapter and I found their almost light hearted NS interaction so much better, I hope you guys agree :)**

**I seem to have hit writers block and I'm still a little worried about the direction I'm taking this story but your reviews are so amazing and inspiring and I love reading every single one of them, thank you so much for your thoughts**

**Guys Blake Lively is pregnant! This baby is going to be so gorgeous and Blake has that pregnancy glow and ah I'm so happy for her**

**Anyway please review and let me know what you think**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	7. Chapter 7

"Mom?" Summer asked stepping further onto the balcony, searching her mother for an answer.

"What are you doing out here honey?" Serena asked pushing her hair back. "I thought you were going to stay inside with Erik or Jenny."

"You didn't come back inside for a really long time," Summer said before tilting her head so she could look around Serena to Nate. "And then that lady, Blair, she told me something and I had to ask you about it."

Nate had his jaw clenched, his entire body was completely tense, his eyes kept fluttering from Serena to this little girl standing next to her, the one who was a replica of Serena but if you looked for it looked so much like him too.

"What did she tell you?" Serena said, getting a little angry about what Blair could have told Summer and wondering what Summer had heard when she came onto the balcony and if she should just tell her now or speak to Nate first and then talk to Summer when she has it all figured out herself.

"She said you knew who my dad was," Summer said, her voice breaking and Serena tensed as her daughter looked up at Nate. "Mom?"

Serena heard the desperation in her daughters voice for her to say that she has no idea what Blair was talking about but she couldn't lie to her straight out, she could feel Nate staring at her as well. "Honey, come here," Serena said holding her hands out to the girl and she stared down at them with tears in her eyes.

"You knew who my dad was this whole time?" she asked incredulously and Serena nodded and reached out to wipe the tears that slipped down Summers face only to have her hand batted away. "And you didn't tell me?"

"Summer," Serena started but the 12 year old cut her off.

"No mom," she said taking a step away from her mother and backing up against the wall. "Ever since I knew I was supposed to have a dad I wanted to know who he was and you always stood by the fact that you didn't know and I believed you because you would've told me the truth, I knew you would have, so I didn't ask because it made you sad when other people asked and you're my mom so of course you knew that I wanted to know."

"Baby-"

"But you knew who he was all along and you didn't tell me," Summer said wiping the tears rolling down her red cheeks. "We tell each other everything, how could you not tell me this? Didn't you think it was important enough? Didn't you think I could handle it? I'm 12 years old, I'm not a child anymore."

Serena let her head drop for a moment, she was supposed to tell Summer in her own time, she was supposed to talk to Nate first, to judge where he stood. She knew none of this was going to be easy but she was a fool to think she could control the circumstances regarding it.

"Is what you said just now true?" Summer asked staring at Nate, who just stood there, watching her. "About him?"

"I am ... I'm your ... your dad," he said as if still testing out the term and Summer stared at him shocked for a moment, watching him the way he was watching her before she turned to stare at her mother.

"Let's go inside and I will explain," Serena said reaching out to her daughter again.

"No, I don't want to go inside," Summer screamed turning to Nate and glaring at him. "Did you know? Did you not want me? Is that why she didn't tell me?"

Serena's heart sank as she listened to her daughter try to make sense of this by protecting her and blaming Nate for her secrecy.

"I had no idea," Nate told her quietly and Serena could hear the shock in his voice, how he stared at Summer in awe because she was his daughter.

Serena swallowed when Nate turned back to her and pressed her lips together for a moment as she gathered herself. "I can't do this," Summer said before Serena could speak, turning and running past Erik who had come to see what was going on. Erik shot his sister a worried look and ran after his niece.

Serena blew out a breath and wished she never returned to New York for the millionth time since she walked of that plane. "You had a life ahead of you, you had dreams and you had such high expectations from your family and if I told you I was pregnant you would have given it all up for me and the baby in a heartbeat and I couldn't let you do that."

"So you just decided to hide her from me?" Nate asked glancing back to the door where she just disappeared. "She's ... she's ... Serena she looks-"

"I know," Serena said nodding. "I think we need to get inside and explain to the rest of the family and I need to find my girl and, and ..."

"She's my girl too," Nate said and Serena bit her lip to stop the tears. "There's no way you're keeping her from me again."

"Ok," Serena said nodding, there was so much that still needed to be said and done but she could agree to this without putting up a fight. "Ok."

"God Serena what were you thinking?" Nate asked looking just about ready to scream.

"I had to keep her," she said and Nate rubbed his face. "And I couldn't mess up your life for us."

"Just stop," he said holding up a hand. "No more excuses, I don't think I can listen to them right now."

"Nate-"

"Tell Summer I'll be in touch if she decides to speak to you again," he said walking past her. "We'll talk if _I_ decide to ever speak to you again."

* * *

Serena stormed back inside once she had composed herself and walked straight to Blair, hooking their arms together and smiling tightly at everyone watching as she pulled Blair away from Isobel.

"What the hell is your problem?" Serena asked, her voice dangerously low once they were alone.

"What the hell is yours?" Blair asked. "You pulled me away from a very important conversation."

"Oh I'm sure talking to Isobel about her handbag was riveting," Serena spat out. "You had no right to tell Summer what you did."

"You're right Serena, you were supposed to," Blair said tilting her head. "She has every right to know, I was being a good aunt and telling her the truth."

"That was not your decision to make," Serena said, tears springing to her eyes. "Did it ever occur to you that I was going to tell her on my own time? When things were calmer?"

"Did it ever occur to you that you were taking too long?" Blair retorted, frustrated with Serena. "There was no better time and I was not about to let Nate miss out on knowing who his daughter was."

"The better time would have been anytime after today when she attended the funeral of her great grandmother," Serena said and Blair's smile dropped, she wasn't thinking of that. "I know how long I took and I need to explain that to her but I needed to tell Nate and judge if he wanted her before I let her down."

"You actually had a doubt in your mind that Nate would turn her away?" Blair asked, twisting her mouth. "Who are you?"

"I didn't doubt it but I had to be sure, she's my daughter, I had to be sure," Serena said desperately and Blair clenched her jaw at the look on Serena's face, the need to protect her child. "Now she's gone and she's probably never going to talk to me again because she didn't find out from me."

"You should have thought about that Serena," Blair said shaking her head. "You were coming back to New York, where secrets spill out before you can blink and friends betray each other without warning, or don't you remember?"

"How did you even find out?" Serena asked rubbing her forehead.

"Look at her," Blair said. "Sure she looks like you at first glance but if you really look at her, all she is, is Nate, I know what happened before you left, I just had to put it together."

"You still shouldn't have said anything to her," Serena said. "She shouldn't be in the middle of whatever war we have here."

"She deserved to know, you can't blame me for telling her a truth that you hid from her," Blair said crossing her arms. "I don't know what you expected when you pulled me in here Serena, but if I were you I'd be more focused on what you're going to say to her to make her forgive you."

* * *

"Erik, I need to know that she's ok, just call me when you get this, please," she begged as she left her brother yet another message. She paced her room nervously as she waited for any news at all, she would have gone searching for Summer herself but she knew that Erik would be right behind her and the 12 year old would need as much space from her mother as possible right now.

"Sit down let's talk," Lily said barging into her room and shutting the door, Serena raised her eyebrows at her mother but continued to pace, even as Lily sat and watched her. "Do you want to tell me what happened this afternoon?"

"Not particularly no," Serena mumbled looking at her phone again.

"Well you're going to tell me anyway," Lily said crossing her legs. "I want to know why my granddaughter ran out of here in tears and why Nate stormed out not too much longer than that."

"I wouldn't know," Serena said shaking her head.

"Considering it's your daughter darling, I expect you to know," Lily said harshly and Serena turned to glare at her mother.

"Yeah like you knew what I was thinking when I was 12?" Serena asked raising an eyebrow, she didn't speak to her mother about those forgotten years, she didn't think she wanted an answer but right now all it sounded like was her mother judging her about how she was raising her own daughter and she couldn't stop herself.

"Serena," Lily sighed and Serena shook her head she didn't want to talk about it, she didn't want explanations from her mother, she just needed to know that Erik was with Summer and that they were safe.

"I don't even care mom," Serena said throwing her hands up and letting out an exhausted breath. "All you need to know right now is that she's angry with me and I just want to pack her up and leave."

"You can't leave yet, you've only been back 2 days," Lily told her, Serena's original plan was just to stay the weekend and just decide with Summer if she wanted to extend that after she met Nate but now she just wanted to leave. Even though she knew that there was no way that was going to happen.

"And look at how well that has gone mom," Serena said checking her phone again. "Everyone is either annoyed that I'm back or pissed at me for leaving and now my daughter is angry at me and going back home is not going to fix that."

"Serena _this_ is your home," Lily tried and Serena shook her head.

"It was my home, I left and now it's just a place I grew up too fast in," Serena told her jumping when her phone buzzed. "They're coming back up."

"She's confused and scared and not really sure what's going on right now," Erik said smiling softly at his sister when Summer raced past them and slammed her door. "She didn't tell me anything, I think she wants to talk to you first, so do you wanna fill me in on why I spent my afternoon running after a 12 year old."

"I told her who her dad was," Serena mumbled and Erik looked at Serena with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh," he said nodding and scratching his chin.

"Oh? That's all you're going to say?" Serena asked giving him a shocked laugh. "You knew?"

"Well I figured it out when I saw Nate standing there looking like he was going to faint," Erik said and Serena cringed. "I just thought you would have told Summer before that, you knew this was going to happen."

"Yeah, that seems like the theme of the day," Serena said pinching the bridge of her nose. "I just thought I could come here and see everyone and show Summer where I grew up and then tell then when the time felt right and run as far away as I could."

"You knew you were coming to New York right?" Erik asked nudging her and Serena groaned. "There's no way anything you wanted to keep secret was going to stay secret."

"I hate it when you're right," Serena mumbled and Erik grinned, he loved it.

"I usually am," Erik told her.

Serena nudged her brother and then looked back at the closed door. "Time to face the music."

"She'll understand your reasons," Erik said and Serena smiled at his encouragement. "She's forgiving like that."

"Hopefully she takes after Nate like that," Serena said smiling and opening the door carefully. Summer was lying on the bed, her back to Serena but Serena could see she was awake.

"I know you're angry with me," Serena said taking a breath. "There are things that you need to understand, when you decide you're talking to me again, I will tell you but just know that I love you so much."

* * *

**A/N : I'm so late with this update I know, I'm sorry, especially after the way I left it, but guys look, new chapter lol**

**If you've been reading these authors notes you'd know that I've been very unsure about the direction that I was taking this story in, so I've scraped that idea and deleted everything, because I was getting nowhere, I have a better idea of what I'm doing now but the time between chapters might just be this long every update until I find the time to write ahead**

**Ok I hope that Nate and Summer and Serena's reactions were believable and that Blair's involvement was also in character**

**Please review and let me know what you think, and thank you so much for those wonderful reviews in the previous chapter**

**musicalblairs - ah i knew I was missing something when I wrote the Serena and Henry interaction! Him introducing himself in the Chuck Bass way would have been perfect **

**Anyway Until Next Time (^^,)**


	8. Chapter 8

"She's still not talking to me," Serena told Erik the next day as she stared at her daughters closed door. "Maybe I should go in there and make her talk to me."

"What happened to the 'I'll let her come to me' attitude?" Erik asked his sister. "It's only been a few hours."

"I know but I had too much time to think about it," Serena told him. "That was a terrible idea."

"She's not in there anyway," Erik mentioned taking a long sip of his coffee and looking at his sister out of the corner of his eye.

"What?" Serena squeaked, speed walking to the door and throwing it open to find the room empty."Where is she?"

"Well Nate called this morning," Erik said carefully, watching his sister start to freak out internally. "He spoke to her and they decided that they wanted to get out of the house," Erik said, Serena bit her lip and smiled sadly because she and Erik both knew they wanted to get away from her. "I think he just took her for breakfast."

"And you couldn't have told me this?" Serena asked throwing her arms up. "I need to know where she is Erik, she doesn't know New York, what if she needs me?"

"Relax, she has her phone and she has me on speed dial," Erik said holding up his phone and giving his sister a sympathetic smile. "S, you told her something really huge yesterday, both of them, and it's going to- no, it has already changed everything, so you need to realize that and find a way to explain and get them to forgive you."

"I didn't do it to hurt them," Serena said sitting on the bed and pressing her fingers to her head. "Why did Blair have to tell her?"

"You can't blame Blair either," Erik said and Serena glared at her little brother but she knew he was right. "I'm just saying, I admit it was a sneaky move but you know as well as I do that no matter how she found out this would have been the result."

"But then I would have been the one to talk to her," Serena said groaning. "Now it's just going to be so much harder, I should have told her before we came here."

"Then why didn't you?" Erik asked, he always had Nate in his mind when he thought about Summer's father but he figured his sister really wasn't sure who Summer's father was and that's why she didn't tell the girl.

"I wanted to, every time I looked at her I wanted to, but then I thought of Nate and how he shouldn't have to give up his life because of what we did," Serena said and Erik frowned at her.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," Erik said rolling his eyes. "Nate wouldn't have thought that way."

"I was 15 Erik, I didn't know how else to think," she said feeling as if something was caught in her throat and Erik walked over to sit next to her. "Then it just got harder to explain why I didn't say anything and she didn't even ask but grandma decided that it had to be done instead of her finding out a few years down the line and having our relationship become like ours with mom and I don't want that."

"Grandma was a smart woman," Erik said nodding. "I don't think Summer is at the age where you have infinite chances but she's not at the unforgiving years yet either, tread carefully."

"Thank you," Serena mouthed. "She's safe with Nate, so I think I'm going to go for a walk, and re-evaluate every life decision I've ever made."

"Don't get lost," Erik called as his sister stood up and walked out of the room, leaving him to sigh and shake his head after her wondering how someone so smart could get herself into such a big mess.

* * *

Summer sat awkwardly at the table looking down at her hands on the table and fiddling with her thumbs. She always just wished that maybe one day she'd meet her dad and when she did, she always thought it would be perfect and they'd hug and talk and laugh and be thick as thieves and play little pranks on her mom.

She didn't expect them to just sit in silence, commenting on the weather or the food. Where were all the questions he should have for her, didn't he want to know who she is? Was he as nervous as she was? There were so many things she wanted to ask him as well but she had no idea where to start, how would she even phrase the questions to ask her newly found father?

She looked up at Nate who seemed to be studying her and looked back down again, she didn't know how to hold eye contact with him, without feeling like she had to say something. Her eyes were always darker than her mother's and now she finally knew why, she could pick out other little things about the way he was and looked, she got excited every time she did because even though she'd never met him, she was still a part of him.

"I always thought you'd be a drug addict or a really bad guy," Summer said softly, biting her lip as she looked up at Nate and looked down again, picking at the last bits of her pancakes. "I thought if mom was really lying about not knowing you, at least she'd have a good reason for lying to me."

"I'm sure she had her reasons," Nate said, a little smile making its way onto his face as the little girl, no, _his_ little girl made conversation with him, even if it was to tell him she didn't have very high hopes for him.

"Why are you protecting her?" Summer asked almost whining as she huffed and crossed her arms letting go of her fork and letting it clutter onto the table. Of all people who would try to convince her that her mother had her reasons for keeping this secret she never thought the man in front of her would be one of them.

"Your mom is alot of things but vindictive is not one of them, at least not from when I used to know her," Nate explained hoping that the 12 year old will understand. "I don't want to protect her but I believe her when she said she thought she was protecting us by doing this."

"How?" Summer asked exasperated, her parents were driving her mad, she didn't even have the time to get excited that she now thought of both parents not just her mom.

"I don't know," Nate said heavily amused by the child who was growing more and more frustrated with every answer, the smile on his face didn't help either. "But when you go back to Lily's I think you should talk to her, just trust me on this."

"Not even my dad for one day and you expect me to trust you that much," Summer said huffing and crossing her arms, the comedic effect of how light hearted that moment was considering the topic of conversation hit them both at the same time and Nate reached over to make a shushing motion to stop their loud laughs when people started looking their way.

"Now that we've broken the ice, I think we should leave before we get kicked out," Nate said grinning as he motioned to the waited and Summer nodded in agreement. "I have a feeling we might have a few more laughs like that."

"So you really think I should talk to mom?" Summer asked standing up and stretching, she wasn't used to waking up this early and she felt stiff. "I don't want her to think I'm ok with her keeping this from me for so long."

"I don't think you will be for a while but it won't hurt," Nate said guiding her out when he was done paying. "Plus I think that you miss her already, you two don't fight very often, do you?"

"Little things, we get on each other's nerves sometimes," Summer said crossing her arms to hold her elbows in front of her body as they walked. "This is the longest we've gone without speaking after a fight."

"Your mom loves you," Nate said, there were moments since he found out where he thought Serena was the most heartless person he'd ever known but there was no doubt that she loved Summer with everything she had. "Not everyone has that relationship, just look at her and your grandmother."

"Are you like that with your mom?" Summer asked, suddenly curious about this other grandmother that could exist.

"I have a ... different kind of relationship with my parents," Nate said thinking of a way to explain it without making his daughter run the other way. "We speak often enough, I wonder how she'll react to the fact that she's a grandmother."

Summer looked at Nate's amused face and wondered who his mother was and if she'd like being a grandmother to a 12 and a half year old, its questions like this that had been going through her head the whole night that she wished she could let go of her anger toward her mother and just go ask her for answers. "Can I call you dad?" Summer asked, till this moment she hadn't needed to call Nate a specific term, not even to get his attention, but that was the main question running through her mind.

Nate stopped dead in his tracks and stared at her, Summer swallowed nervously, tensing up slightly as she waited for his answer.

Nate was overjoyed, he was trying to find a way to ask her to call him 'dad' since that morning when he saw her, she was just like Serena, asking questions he hadn't fully formed in his mind or gathered enough courage to ask. "I'd like that a lot," he said smiling, his heart warming as she relaxed and smiled wide as well.

* * *

"Summer is back," Lily said when Serena walked through the door, she looked up startled at her mother, not expecting her to speak until Serena was well into the room.

"Yeah, Erik texted me when she got back," Serena said walking further into the room toward her mother.

"So Nate is her father," Lily said, looking at Serena like this is something that she should have been informed about. "I would say I'm surprised but it always confused me that he chose Blair over you."

"How'd you find out?" Serena asked dropping her bag onto the counter.

"When Nate brought Summer back about half an hour ago and she introduced him as her dad," Lily said shrugging slightly. "Imagine my surprise."

"Mom I would have told you sooner," Serena started but Lily held a hand up and shook her head.

"Erik explained that you wanted to speak to the main ones involved first," Lily told her. "Did your grandmother know?"

"Not because I told her," Serena said shaking her head, her mother only asked that so she could judge how much Serena told her Cece. "I don't know how she found out."

"Well your grandmother always knew things as soon as it happened," Lily said sighing. "It's one of those things I learned to live with as a teenager."

"Nothing got past her," Serena said smiling as she remembered her grandmother.

"Serena, darling," Lily said looking down at the ground and biting her lip as her expression became serious. "I want to talk to you about the circumstances around Summers birth and our relationship at the time."

"Can we talk about it some other time?" Serena asked shaking her head because she felt drained. "I just ... I think the next emotional talk I have needs to be with Summer or Nate or I'm going to lose it."

"Serena," Lily started but stopped at the look on Serena's face, choosing instead to nod and let it go for the moment, she's put of this conversation for such a long time, what's another 13 years.

"So, Summer called him dad?" Serena asked choosing to focus on that little bit of information.

"She did," Lily said grinning because her granddaughter was so excited at using the term to introduce him. "She gave him a hug and made him promise to take her out on the boat soon, I don't think I've ever seen her smile so much."

Serena looked down and smiled to herself, there was so much she could have done differently, that she should have done differently, telling Nate about Summer was definitely the first thing on that list. "I'm glad."

"Darling," Lily said gently reaching out to take Serena's hand in her own. "She'll come around, she loves you."

Serena smiled and squeezed her mothers hand, for all the times that she wasn't around and she wasn't a mother, Serena was so happy that she was trying now. "So I saw Aunt Carol at the cemetery," Serena said changing the subject. "She left quickly though."

"How did you even recognize her?" Lily asked with a laugh and Serena shrugged, she'd seen enough pictures to know who the woman was. "I was surprised she showed up, she cried, sat close to me and then decided she had a family emergency and rushed off, I'm not really sure what to make of it."

"How long has it been since you've seen her?" Serena asked smiling at her mother's annoyance.

"It was about the time that Erik was born," Lily said frowning deeply. "She just sent emails, didn't visit your grandmother once and all off a sudden she's acting like she was here all a long."

"You think she's up to something?" Serena asks watching the way her mother spoke.

"Oh I know she's up to something," Lily said sighing. "I just need to figure out what it is."

Summer clears her throat when she appears at the end of the hall and looks at Serena just as she's about to reply to Lily. She's standing awkwardly looking from her mother to her grandmother and shuffling her feet as she finally settled her gaze to Serena, before turning and walking back to her room.

"I think that means she's ready to talk," Serena said staring at the spot her daughter was just at.

"Well you said the next emotional talk you have will be with her," Lily reminded her and Serena smiled tiredly and nodded. "Good luck darling."

* * *

**A/N : So this is possibly a very disappointing chapter or just a starting point to recovery, I've written and rewritten this chapter quite a few times and in the first few drafts Nate and Summer were not involved in anyway but after a while I sort of figured that I needed them to have a conversation as awkward as the one they had was lol and I actually liked how that turned out**

**I wanted Summer and Serena to have a full chapter for the talk they needed to have but I didn't want it directly after the last chapter so this is a filler just to cushion against all the angst if that makes sense, I'm really glad you guys are enjoying it**

**Thank you guys for all the reviews, I love reading your thoughts on evil Blair and where I'm taking this story **

**nite255 - I've been thinking of ways to bring Nates family into this since it started haha but I do want to, so maybe in the next few chapters I can fit them in :P**

**Please review and let me know what you think **

**Until next time (^^,)**


	9. Chapter 9

Serena walked into Summers room to find her curled up against her headboard, picking at the side of her comforter.

"Hey," Serena said gently, shutting the door and walking further into the room. Summer looked up at Serena but didn't make any other move to acknowledge her presence. "Grandma Lily tells me you had fun with Nate today."

Summer nodded and bit her lip, Serena sighed and took a seat in front of her daughter and waited for another response, sighing when she didn't get one.

"You're really not going to talk to me at all?" Serena asked and Summer looked up at her and shrugged and Serena figured that's about as good as it was going to get for the moment.

Serena didn't know what exactly Nate told her but she knew Summer was waiting for her side of the story so she had to start talking.

"Ok, so Nate, Blair and I were best friends since we were born," Serena started, she might as well tell this story from the beginning. "We met Chuck when we were four and Blair decided she was going to marry Nate when we were five."

Summer raised an eyebrow at the age but she didn't say anymore, so Serena took that as her cue to continue.

"Erik was born when I was 7 and my dad, your grandfather, left us maybe 3 or 4 months after that," Serena said clenching her jaw and closing her eyes for a beat before continuing. "Grandma Lily didn't stay around for much longer after that, I saw my mother maybe once or twice a year and as you know I haven't seen my father since, I hated nannies, which is why you never had one, I used to pack Erik up in his stroller with whatever we needed and go to Nate or Blair's houses, they were the only people I trusted then."

Blue eyes shifted up to look at her curiously and Serena smiled sadly, she hated talking about her father or the time he left, it was easier to be angry at her mother for everything because she was there, she came back, with her father it was just a memory that she was upset with, a ghost that she couldn't touch.

"Erik and I told you how many times Grandma Lily got married after that," Serena said and Summer nodded wearily, looking like she needed to talk to her grandmother to verify that. "Well she brought home her first husband when I was about 9 and I threw the biggest fit, I refused to accept it but they didn't stay around long enough to really matter and they divorced a little while after that."

"Was that Claus with a C?" Summer asked and Serena almost smiled as her daughter spoke to her, letting her know that all hope wasn't completely lost if she was paying attention.

"No, she didn't marry Claus with a C, he was just her boyfriend before this guy," Serena said and Summer nodded slowly and looked at Serena to carry on. "Klaus with a K, was marriage number 2, I was about your age and didn't like that one anymore than the first but I only met him once at their wedding and then never saw him again."

Summer pulled her knees closer to her body and bit her lip as she stared at her mother.

"By the time my mother married for the third time, I was almost 14 and just realizing that I was in love with my best friend's boyfriend," Serena explained and Summer sucked in a breath, Erik joked about it when they were telling her about Nate but it was another thing hearing her mother say it. "I also realized that doing certain things got my mother's attention enough that she'd have to stay in town with us longer than 5 minutes."

"What things?" Summer asked curiously and Serena frowned as she thought of a way to explain this to the 12 year old.

"By doing things my mother didn't want the public to know," Serena said and Summer frowned at her, Serena could almost see the argument that she was supposed to lay everything on the table during this talk. "Ok you have to know that I was 14 and looking for attention, my friend Georgina and I got fake ID's and we started drinking and clubbing, when he was in the mood, Chuck joined us a well, it was reckless and stupid and thankfully we came out of that period relatively unscathed."

Summers frown got deeper and Serena almost had the urge to reach over and smooth her forehead and tease her about getting wrinkles but thought better off it, all that would get her was a glare and her hand slapped away.

"Blair and Nate were my 'protectors' you could say, they took care of Erik and I after my ... wild nights," Serena told her, wincing as she thought back to how she did the same thing to Erik that their mother did when she left him with her friends. "A lot of times Blair didn't know what to do with me, so I spent much more time with Nate then I did with Blair and after a while I thought that maybe he felt the same way about me that I felt about him."

Summer nodded like she understood and Serena took a breath and hoped that the girl she raised was ready to handle her past and the things that Serena wished she could change.

"The summer I left, Nate and I spent most of our holiday together since we were the only ones of our group in New York, Chuck's dad had him helping out in the business and Blair's parents took her to Paris," Serena said noting how Summer's eyes lit up at the mention of Paris, some of her classmates had been the year before and she was dying to go soon as well. "We went to a wedding a few weeks in and I convinced him to get drunk with me."

Summer bit her lip and took a deep breath, mimicking her mother. She knew that it had gotten to the point in the story where her mother told her about when she found out she was pregnant.

"I realized who I betrayed by the time I was sober, I left town as soon as I could, I didn't say goodbye to anyone, Grams wasn't a big part of our lives but she was the only person I could think to go to," Serena said looking down and pushing back the emotion she still felt when thinking about that time. "I started getting sick about a month after and that's when I found out about you."

Summer smiled slightly at the smile on her mother's face when she spoke about finding out about her. "Why didn't you tell him?" Summer asked softly, asking what she really wanted to get to and Serena didn't need to ask who he was to know Summer was asking about Nate.

"We were both 15 years old, we were still children ourselves, lost, confused children, that day we spent together was perfect and I could have pretended that we were a couple forever but it was just a dream, as far as I was concerned he loved me but he was in love with Blair and he had obligations to his family and dreams to travel the world," Serena said thinking of ways to explain it so that it made sense. "I didn't want him to give them up for us like I knew he would have, I didn't want to hurt Blair anymore than I knew I had, I didn't want him to wake up one day and resent us for ruining his life."

"If Blair didn't tell me that you knew, would you have ever told me?" Summer asked and Serena nodded. "Because she seemed more than happy to fill me in if you didn't tell me."

"And Blair and I are probably going to fight about that a few more times," Serena said and Summer raised an eyebrow. "The reason I agreed to bring you to New York _was_ to tell you about Nate and who he was and tell him who you were, that day at Central Park he caught me off guard and that didn't seem like the place to tell either of you so I waited and yesterday when I spoke to him I told him, I wanted to get his reaction before I brought you into it but you came in as I said it and I had no control over it."

"You know some warning would have been nice," Summer said crossing her arms. "Like in the plane on the way here or maybe when we were talking about him after we met him, mom."

"Summer I know that you're angry at me for keeping this from you but I need you to know that I thought I was doing the right thing," Serena begged.

"How?" she asked with tears in her eyes. "He's my dad and he would have been happy to be my dad but he doesn't know me."

"Ok, look at me," Serena said gently, pushing herself closer to Summer and take her hands. "When Grams told me I could live with her I jumped at the chance, I didn't want to face Blair after what I had done and I didn't want to see Nate after I just left, I was a coward and after you were born I was terrified that if Nate found out then he or his family would try and take you away from me and I couldn't handle the thought of that because I love you more than anything in this world and as more time passed, I just kept delaying this moment because I was terrified of what you and Nate would think of me for keeping this secret."

"Mom," Summer started and Serena nodded and ran her fingers through her daughters hair, relieved when her hand wasn't batted away.

"For the longest time, I convinced myself that I was doing the right thing," Serena said tilting her head. "I know that it was wrong of me to keep you away from each other no matter the reasons and I know that I can't give you back the years that you lost with him and I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am for that but I was blindly protecting both of you the only way I knew how and I will always protect you, no matter what."

Summer leaned forward so she could hug her mother, burying her face in her hair. "I want to hate you for this."

"I know baby," Serena said holding the girl as tight as she could to herself. "I'm so sorry."

"I'm still mad with you," she mumbled and Serena almost laughed but hid it as best she could.

"I wouldn't expect any less," Serena told her, pressing a kiss to her head.

"This was really selfish of you, mom," Summer said gripping the sides of her mother's shirt. "You should have told us, we could have met years ago."

"I know," Serena said as Summer let go of her and pushed herself back away from Serena, wiping her eyes and uncurling her legs. "I know," Serena whispered to herself again watching Summer adjust herself.

"He told me he wants to introduce me to his family," Summer said looking up at her mother nervously, meeting new people always made her nervous, especially if she felt that these people were expecting something of her. "I don't think I'm ready."

"I'm sure even he wants some time to get used to this before introducing you to everyone," Serena said with a smile as she realized that the reason for this quick truce was that Summer was confused about what to do and just needed her mom, it made her happy that even after her betrayal, her daughter still thought like that.

"What are they like?" Summer asked biting down on her lip. "The Archibalds?"

"I don't really know," Serena said and Summer looked up at her even more nervous than she was before. "I doubt you'll meet any of them, I never did, you'll meet Anne, Nate's mother, her side of the family, the van der Bilts ... she's a little like grams was."

"You're making me really look forward to meeting this lady," Summer told her dryly and Serena rolled her eyes, there's the sarcastic little girl she left LA with. "Maybe I should just get to know him before I think about another crazy grandmother."

"Good idea," Serena said smiling, it wasn't over yet, this little talk she had with Summer was just the beginning, there were more talks to get through, with Summer and everyone else she left behind, but this was the start.

* * *

**A/N : I have gone over this chapter so many times, its not even funny, it is at this point that I am stuck lol but I have some time now after my week of big exams so I think I can write now and hopefully the inspiration hasn't completely abandoned me **

**I am so so so sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out, its just been a little stressful with exams but they are almost over so yey **

**Serena and Summers talk was very important to me and I am really happy with the way this chapter came out, I hope you guys like it as well and I promise to try and get Nate and Serena in the same scene again soon lol but this story is very much about Serena and Summer, so I hope you guys aren't getting too frustrated with me for focusing so much on them**

**Thank you so so much for the reviews on the previous chapter**

**I really hoped you liked this chapter, please review and let me know what you think**

**Until next time(^^,)**


	10. Chapter 10

"Nathaniel," Chuck said when he saw Nate. "How lovely of you to grace us with your presence."

"What are you talking about," Nate asked laughing. "I graced you with my presence yesterday."

"You mean that 2 minute 'hi and bye'?" Blair asked smirking at him and Nate rolled his eyes. "Even Henry was confused with that."

"Where is he?" Nate asked hoping to just play with his godson and avoid his best friends.

"He's already asleep," Chuck said nodding his head toward the stairs.

"I've been trying to split my time between Summer and Lola," Nate said taking a breath as he offered up an explanation for his absentness. "I guess I forgot to give you guys equal time."

"I forgive you," Blair said like it was such an effort to and then gestured to the chair next to him. "Come, sit, tell us all about your love child."

Nate rolled his eyes at the amused looks on Chuck and Blair's faces but sat down anyway. "What do you want to know?"

"Seeing as you haven't told us anything at all," Blair said pointedly. "Everything."

"Have you spoken to Serena yet?" Chuck asked surprising Nate, he was expecting that question from Blair, asked a little more snidely. "Since she told you."

"Who cares about her?" Blair mumbled crossing her arms. "Rumour has it that you introduced the girl to _Lola_ but you haven't introduced her to us yet, I'm hurt Nate."

"Who's rumour?" Nate asked and Blair raised an eyebrow because he was focusing on the wrong thing. "You've already been introduced to her."

"That was barely an introduction," Blair said waving him off. "God knows what horrible things Serena must have told her about me, at least I know if you introduce me to her, she'll have a positive view of me."

"Well sweetheart you were the one who spilled the big news to the child," Chuck said mocking her when he called her 'sweetheart' and Blair frowned.

"That was not my fault," Blair said shaking her head. "It's Serena's fault for not just being honest."

Nate and Chuck looked at each other over Blair's head and Chuck shrugged. "I have breakfast with her every morning, maybe you can come with us tomorrow," Nate offered.

"That was a horrible invitation," Blair scolded and Chuck bit his lip to hold in his laugh as his best friend cringed. "But I'll take it seeing as it's the best one I'm going to get."

"Just go with it," Chuck said smirking when Nate looked like he was about to protest.

"Tell us about her," Blair encouraged after glaring at Chuck for his comment. "I want to know what she's like, how do you feel now that you're a dad and to Serena's kid."

"Her name is Summer and it's pretty awesome," Nate said smiling and looking down at the ground, choosing to ignore Blair's comment and focus on his daughter. "She's like ... she's so much like me and then sometimes I look at her and it's like I'm talking to Serena, I can't really explain it."

"I thought you might want to wait a while before talking to her," Chuck said, he knew Nate called Erik the next morning to talk to Summer and ask her to go for breakfast with him, he spent half the night on the phone with Nate as he tried to figure out what just happened and when would be the best time to approach Summer.

"I know but then I figured, we lost so much time already," Nate said shrugging and Chuck nodded. "Why wait?"

"Maybe because she's 12 years old," Blair said, staring at Nate like he should know this. "And 12 year old girls need time when they find out who their long lost father is."

"Well she was angry at Serena and I guess she just really needed to get out of Lily's so it was a win-win for the both of us," Nate said wincing because he didn't actually think about the time she might need, he just assumed she'd be ok with it but it's not like he forced her, he asked Erik. "I'm glad I did, it was really awkward at first but she's such an easy person to talk to."

"Is she still angry with Serena?" Blair asked raising an eyebrow and hiding her smile at Nate's happiness.

"I don't know," he said and both Chuck and Blair sent him a pointed look. "We don't talk about Serena, she knows that I'm still pretty pissed at her and I think she wanted to stay angry at Serena for as long as I was but I told her not to be, I could see how much she needed to talk to her mother."

"Urg Nate, why are you so good," Blair said and Nate laughed.

"How did it go with her and Lola?" Chuck asked because he knew Blair wouldn't even though she wanted to know.

"I'm not sure," he said slowly. "She met Lola before at central park, remember?" he asked and they nodded, how could they forget, he was so excited to see Serena again he couldn't stop talking about it the whole night when he saw them. "Lola didn't exactly give off the best impression then but she was nice enough at breakfast this morning, Summer didn't seem to like her very much."

"She's got good instincts," Blair said nodding and Nate looked at her confused.

"Lola?" he asked.

"No, Summer," Blair said shaking her head. "Why would I say anything good about that emotional wreck of a girl that you're dating?"

Nate took a deep breath and blew it out very slowly, they've known Lola for 4 years and Nate had been dating her for about half that time by then but Blair still could not get used to her and spent every chance she could undermining her.

"Have you met her parents yet, Nathaniel?" Chuck asked, unlike Blair he listened to Nate when he spoke about his girlfriend and while he didn't think that relationship would last, he made an effort for Nate's sake.

"No, it's the first time they've come to New York," Nate says biting on his lip and furrowing his brows. "The only time she'll speak about them is to say that her mother is driving her crazy and she can't wait for her dad to get to town which was supposed to be today and then she'll change the subject when I bring up meeting them."

"There's something about her," Blair said softly, shaking her head again. "I think Summer gives you the perfect excuse to break up with Lola, she's your daughter and you have to focus on her and once she's completely comfortable with you then you can think about Lola."

Chuck laughed and Nate sighed, why did he talk to Blair about his troubles again?

"There is something that Lola said," Nate said uncomfortably and both Blair and Chuck looked over at him curiously as they waited for him to continue.

"What did she say?" Chuck prodded when Nate didn't continue right away.

"She said she thinks that I should have done a DNA test," Nate said and Blair looked even more repulsed by Lola than before and even Chuck shook his head. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Do you think that too?" Blair asked, the other thing about Lola that she hated was that she always tried to control Nate and plant silly thoughts like this one in his head.

"No, I had no doubt that Summer was mine and from the way Serena told me I don't think she has any doubt either," Nate said taking a breath. "But that was before Lola told me what she thought."

"Nate," Blair screamed reaching over to slap the back of his head. "If you're going to doubt that, doubt it yourself not because that _woman_ doubts it, honestly if it wasn't your kid Serena would have gotten rid of it the moment she found out."

"Did you know?" Nate asked Blair before sliding his eyes over to Chuck.

"I suspected that she was yours but I couldn't be certain," Chuck said knowing that he put the pieces together when he saw the child the first time, he didn't say anything to Nate back then because he was an ass and he was excited to see how it was going to play out, after his father died and he got together with Blair, Summer became a distant memory until they showed up in New York.

"I knew when I met her, her age and her face gave it away but I couldn't just tell you and then be wrong," Blair said shrugging. "So I just gave Summer a little push to get Serena to tell you the truth."

"Why did she feel the need to hide this from me?" Nate asked burying his face in his hands only lifting it when he felt Blair rub his back as she came to sit next to him. "I wasn't completely hopeless back then."

"I think it had more to do with the fact that you were 15 years old than it had to do with you being a terrible father," Blair comforted and Nate smiled slightly.

"Don't tell me you're defending her," he said dramatically as he teased her, Blair rolled her eyes and Chuck smirked.

"I'm not defending her but she did try to make amends the other day," Blair said and Nate tilted his head curiously too look at her. "I bumped into her while she was shopping alone."

"What did you say?" Nate asked as Chuck looked on amused, both knowing that this was a big thing for Blair, her feelings for Serena changed every time she was brought up, sometimes it was hate sometimes it was sadness but they knew that as angry as Blair claimed to be, she just wanted her best friend back home.

"I told her I'll think of forgiving her when you do," Blair said lifting her chin up. "I think that's fair."

"Aw Blair," Nate said reaching over to hug her and Blair squeaked at the sudden contact. "I love you for that but I think you need your best friend."

"I do not need her, I haven't for years now," Blair said pushing out of his arms and both Chuck and Nate looked at her like they didn't believe her. "Don't look at me like that, I don't."

"Back to Summer," Chuck said when he noticed Blair's face change. "Do you think she would mind having us around imposing on your morning ritual?"

"I don't think she'll mind, I mean you guys are more important to me than my actual family," Nate said with a small shrug, he was trying to make them feel better, it was the truth. "As my daughter she's going to have to get used to you sometime."

"Trust Serena to name her daughter after a season," Blair said shaking her head and smiling at them and Nate chuckled.

"It _was_ always our season," he reminded Blair, thinking about how much he loved those hot summer days with Serena on the beach or in the pool, while Chuck and Blair watched from the shade or their air conditioned room, they preferred the cooler weather.

"And Charlotte after 'The Charlotte', I assume?" Chuck asked with a smile as Nate nodded a little unsurely.

"Well you can't say she didn't include you at all, those names are all you, I don't even want to think about the disastrous names she might have picked if she had a boy," Blair said cringing at the thought.

"Nathaniel, did you tell your mother yet?" Chuck asked the thought just occurring to him and then laughed at the horrified look on Nate's face. "I'm going to take that as a no."

"Anne would be thrilled, she's been wanting a grandchild since you left school," Blair said smirking because as much as Anne wanted a grandchild, an almost teenage girl born out of wedlock when her son was 15 might kill her.

"I think I'm going to be disowned," Nate said paling and swallowing hard, if not by his mother than definitely his grandfather.

"Just think of it this way," Blair said as she sat back down next to him. "We've always been more important to you than your actual family."

"I hate it when you use my words against me," Nate said glaring at her and Blair laughed and looked up at Chuck who was smiling at them. "Do you think I'm going to be any good at this? Being a father, to a teenager?"

"I think you're going to be amazing," Blair said in a rare moment of absolute sincerity toward him and Nate nodded and looked up.

"And if you ever need help," Chuck said standing up straighter. "We have Dorota on speed-dial."

"Thanks bro," Nate said laughing at Chucks words but knowing full well what he meant underneath them. "I've got to run, I promised Lola I'd stop by on my way home and it's getting late."

"Remember we have a breakfast date tomorrow," Blair reminded him as he pulled his coat on and sprinted for the door with a quick 'Not tomorrow, I'll call you' as he left.

"What do you think?" Chuck said coming up behind Blair and resting his hands on her hips, drawing circles with his thumbs.

"I think they have a lot to work out," Blair said leaning back so she can nestle her head in the crook of his shoulder. "But ever since Serena left, I don't think I've ever seen Nate so happy, so complete, it's like he's been waiting for them and he didn't even know it."

* * *

**A/N : I'm so sorry, I completely lost track of time and this story and writing it, I won't leave it unfinished I promise, I just have absolutely no idea how to get where I'm going and I don't want to post anything I don't like **

**In the past month I got distracted by reading, like I read the Divergent series and I think I was out off commission for a week after because if you are a fan of that series WTF! I both loved and hated it how it ended lol  
I have also been reading the Throne of Glass series and if you haven't read those books and you like high fantasy and magic and stuff I recommend them  
Anyway enough of my recommendations ...**

**This chapter is sort of just a look into Nate's thoughts and a little more of his relationship with the Chuck and Blair, just bits and pieces of all their thoughts on everything going on**

**I promise I will sort my life out as soon as I can lol and I will try and post more than once a month, if I don't manage to post before this year ends, Merry Christmas to all of you and Happy New Year and I hope that you guys have a fabulous festive season**

**Please let me know what you think, thank you for all your reviews and support**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	11. Chapter 11

Serena glanced up from the book she was reading and raised her eyebrow at Summer stomping through the apartment, throwing her bag down onto the floor and crossing her arms as he sat down heavily next to her mother.

"Hello terrible teens," Serena mumbled under her breath closing her book and placing it down on the table in front of her before turning to look at her daughter.

"What?" Summer growled out and Serena had to bite back a smile as she watched the girl try to keep the exasperated expression on her face as Serena kept staring at her. "Mom, stop staring."

"Do you want to tell me what's bothering you?" Serena asked gently and Summer shook her head and sighed. "Did something happen with Nate?" she asked, it had been a week since Summer and Nate found out and they had spent every morning together before he had to go to work, Serena was surprised the girl woke up every morning.

"No," Summer said shaking her head and Serena let out a sigh of relief, it's not that she didn't trust Nate impeccably, it was that Summer was basically a teenager and his newfound daughter and she worried sometimes that one of them would say or do the wrong thing and she wouldn't be able to help seeing as she was still on shaky ground with Summer and no ground with Nate.

"Ok, did you eat something bad? Fight with Uncle Erik? See Blair again?" Serena listed and each time all she got was a shake of Summers head to say no. "Did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed?" she asked jokingly and for that she got a glare.

"No, mom, none of that," Summer said letting her head fall back onto the couch and she sighed dramatically.

"Ok, then do you want to tell me what happened before I start guessing again?" Serena said. "And you know how bad my guesses can get."

"It's _Lola_," Summer said, twisting the way she said 'Lola', her frown getting deeper and Serena frowned as well, raising her eyebrow and waiting for an explanation as to why Nate's girlfriend was a problem. "I don't like her."

"Honey, what did she do?" Serena prodded when Summer didn't speak.

"She tried to talk to me," Summer said rolling her eyes and Serena scratched her head as she waited for the rest of that explanation because that really couldn't be all to set off her mood.

"About?" Serena asked slowly, getting information out of this child today was like pulling teeth, usually she didn't even have to push very hard before everything came pouring out.

"About dad and how I feel now that I know who he is," Summer huffed and Serena furrowed her brows and clenched her jaw, who exactly did this lady think she was. "Just because something like this happened to her when she was like 5 years old doesn't mean that she knows what I'm thinking, it's not even the same thing, I doubt she can even remember that far back."

"What did Nate have to say about that?" Serena asked, a little angry at him for allowing his girlfriend to talk to their daughter about things that don't affect her.

"He wasn't there," Summer said deflating a little and kicking off her shoes so she could pull her legs up onto the couch. "There was an emergency at work so he had to rush, we were done anyway so all she had to do was make sure I got into a cab safely."

"Does she come out with you every day?" Serena asked curiously.

"No," Summer mumbled. "It was just today and yesterday but she's weird, like she was trying to talk to me about things and smiling at me strangely and being all motherly and I don't like it, I have a mom, you're my mom, I don't want her to be my mom."

Serena didn't think she could really say anything that would be sufficient enough to follow that sentence, she pressed her lips down in an attempt to hide the smile that had formed.

"Plus she was like overly sweet when dad was around and then when he left she was pushy about getting to know me better and I really don't want to talk to her about it mom," Summer said and Serena nodded sympathetically all the while just wanting to kill Nate's girlfriend. "I mean I've barely spoken to you or dad about it."

Serena shivered every time Summer called Nate dad and smiled internally, thankful that everything she did and all the damage she caused was not going to stop them from being as close as they should have been.

"Summ, you haven't liked her since we met her last week," Serena said gently and Summer shot her a look as if to say 'you too' and Serena rolled her eyes because yes she didn't like Lola either but that was for a different reason than her daughters immediate dislike of a random person. "Do you think maybe it's possible that you're just getting irritated at everything she says _because_ you don't like her?"

"Urg, no, mom," Summer said exasperatedly and Serena sighed, maybe she shouldn't have said that when Summer was in this mood. "Me not liking her has nothing to do with her being the most annoying looking person ever."

"Ok, ok, it was just a thought," Serena said shaking her head and Summer sighed and leaned forward so she could rest her chin on the palms of her hands. "Their relationship must be pretty serious if he told her about you so soon and if she's coming out of breakfasts with the two of you, he probably wants you two to get to know each other."

"I guess," Summer said picking her head up again to look at her mother and try and decipher what she was getting at. "They've been dating a while and she doesn't have a ring on her finger, it really can't be that serious."

Serena lost her train of thought for a moment as she laughed at Summer's words and the seriousness of her tone as she said it. "Well honey I think you should maybe try and get used to her if they are serious."

"I have a better idea, how about I just ignore her until she and dad break up," Summer said with a smile, expecting her mom to indulge her and smile as well but she frowned when Serena shook her head. "What?"

"I think if they've been together so long then there's a big possibility that a ring could pop up on her finger soon," Serena said carefully, she didn't want that to happen anymore than Summer did but it was a huge possibility, one she's surprised hadn't happened as yet.

"No," Summer squeaked standing up and glaring at Serena and Serena gulped, she felt a little as if history was repeating itself, she remembers being in Summer's position refusing to accept the remarriage of her one of her parents. "You know if you just told dad the truth you would have been married to him and I would have known him forever and there would be no Lola."

Serena sighed and buried her face in her hands as Summer stormed off, wincing as the door slammed and taking a moment to compose herself before she could go after her daughter. She was expecting moments like this where Summer would blame her for being kept from Nate's life and since their talk about it after Summer found out she kept waiting, she just didn't expect each time to hurt this much.

"Well Grandma, you told me this was going to happen," Serena said looking up. Her grandmother only let Serena know that she knew about Nate in her final weeks but since Summer was born she kept pushing Serena to find the father and tell the girl the truth or find another man and fabricate a believable truth to avoid exactly this kind of accusation and heartbreak. She also told her that Summer was going to drive Serena crazy in her teen years. "Please don't let this be like her terrible two's."

Serena waited a few silent moments before going into Summers room to find the girl sitting on the floor at the foot of her bed throwing a bouncy ball at the wall and catching it when it bounced back to her.

Serena took a moment to remember how she almost cried the first time she saw Summer do this, she was maybe 4 years old and she was upset at Serena for not allowing her to have more sweets so she went to her room and started bouncing that ball and she caught every single rebound, exactly the way Nate used to when they were children and he was upset about something.

"I didn't mean it," Summer said with watery eyes and Serena smiled sadly, of course she meant it. "I just really wish you and dad made it work so we could be a family and I could have known him when I was little."

"I know," Serena whispered, feeling the overwhelming want to transport herself back to when she was 15 so that she would book that flight back home to tell Nate the extraordinarily scary news instead of just staring at the computer screen.

"Maybe then I could have stopped it," Summer said frowning as Serena sat down next to her.

"You really don't like her that much?" Serena asked, knowing that Summer probably really didn't like Lola only because she was dating Nate and for no other reason but that.

"I don't know," Summer said sighing, catching the ball and holding it in her hands, twirling it between her fingers. "I just ... It's too much."

"Come here," Serena said pulling Summer into her arms, stroking the girls back. "I know you want things to be like that fantasy you have in your mind but what if I had told Nate and after a few years it didn't work out and he still ended up with Lola? Maybe Nate and I weren't meant for anything more than to have you, maybe he's meant to be with Lola and you're pushing her away because you want us to be the family I denied you instead of seeing that and being happy for him."

"Mom, you know I love you right," Summer said and Serena raised an eyebrow and waited for the next part of that sentence. "But what if it worked out? Do you really believe that you and dad weren't meant for an epic love, without Lola standing in the way? I saw the way you looked at him, remember, and the way he looked at you, after 13 years of being separated, I'm pretty sure if you wanted him all you'd have to do is tell him."

"Honey he kinda hates me," Serena said pushing Summer's hair back and shaking her head, of course she believed she and Nate were fated to be together, of course she loved him, but she didn't want to give her daughter any false hope. "I kept you from him and I don't think he's going to forgive me for that."

"I forgave you," Summer said shrugging as she slumped a little against the bed. "Dad's just a little mad but if we could get rid of Lola, he'll come right around."

"I feel like this is about to hit dangerous territory," Serena said wearily as she looked at her daughter with narrowed eyes.

"I'm not saying we kill her," Summer said obviously joking and Serena raised her eyebrows. "I'm just saying we break them up."

"If they break up it will have nothing to do with you," Serena said grasping Summers arms gently but staring at her intently. "Nate is happy with her, you will let him be happy with her until he decides he isn't, I don't want you playing the manipulative daughter, that's not how I raised you."

"Fine," Summer said taking a deep breath. "I just want you to be happy, all those relationships that didn't work out finally makes sense now, you were waiting for dad, it's like a movie."

"What kind of movies are you watching?" Serena asked jokingly taking the ball from her and Summer grinned. "Lola isn't your cup of tea but you will deal with her, got it?"

"Got it," Summer said after a moment. "So do you still love him? 13 years is a long time to love someone, especially someone you haven't seen in that long."

Serena took a breath as she threw the ball, her daughter was too inquisitive for her own good and too observant, when did that happen? She was about to say something when she realized the ball was coming back to her, she shrieked and ducked before the ball hit her face, Summer was laughing too hard to glare at Serena for not answering her question.

"Still can't catch it?" Erik asked as he picked the ball of the floor and grinning, Serena rolled her eyes and Erik threw the ball to Summer. Serena could never catch the ball when they played this game, she just threw it and ducked.

"Oh look Erik is back," Serena said dryly, sticking her tongue out at him. "One day I will be just as good as the two of you."

"We've been waiting 12 years," Erik said and Summer giggled.

"You guys are mean," Serena said playfully squinting her eyes at her brother and standing up. "I'm going to go get some work done, try not to cause too much trouble."

"Well what do you want to do kiddo?" Erik said raising an eyebrow as Summer watched Serena walk away from them. "I don't like that look."

"Come on Uncle Erik we have to plan," she said giggling as she ran to the other room excitedly.

"Plan for what?" he asked looking nervously in the direction she just went. "Why do I feel like this isn't going to end well?"

* * *

**A/N : Hey guys I'm soooooo so sorry about the wait, real life was crazy this past month with the festive season and work that writing has been the last thing on my mind and when I finally got back to it it was ridiculously hard to get back into it**

**So I really hope you guys liked this chapter, it is a little random but its more insight into Serena and Summer and their relationship and I'm currently writing Nate into the next update so yey for that, I know this story is progressing slowly but hopefully, if my muse allows it, it will pick up in the next few chapters and lead to an awesome end**

**Please review and let me know what you think , Thank you so so much for the reviews on the previous chapter**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	12. Chapter 12

"Mom what do you think about this one?" Summer asked putting a hat on her head and pouting dramatically as she struck a pose.

"Very cute," Serena said laughing at her daughter's antics and turning to see Lily shake her head. "You don't like it?"

"I don't think that's how you're supposed to do it," Lily said getting up and taking the floppy hat from Summer, striking an equally dramatic pose and both Summer and Serena could have been on the floor they were laughing so hard.

It had been like this all morning, Summer and Serena decided they needed a girls day out and Lily tagged along, bonding with her daughter and granddaughter after years of being distant. Summer had thought that it would have been disastrous, usually when her grandmother was around, her mother was irritable and on edge and she waited for the old lady to leave but today they were laughing and talking and throwing clothes at her to try on, it was like a movie sequence and she loved it.

Summer came out of the dressing room in a dress and twirled for them, her mom gasped and then grinned.

"What? No crazy pose?" she asked because Summer had some new pose for every outfit she tried on.

"I think I like this one too much," Summer said biting her lip and looking at herself in the mirror when he caught her eye. "Dad!"

She turned and sprinted toward him jumping straight into his open arms, Serena's heart stopped as she looked at Nate, their eyes locking for a second before he turned them back to their daughter. "I think I like this one too," he said holding her in front of him so he could see what she was wearing.

"What are you doing here?" she asked raising an eyebrow at him.

"I went looking for you at Lily's but Rufus said you were shopping," Nate said. "We didn't have our morning date so I thought I'd see what you were up to between meetings."

"Mom and grandma are taking me to all their favourite places to shop on the Upper East Side," Summer said smiling and looking at her mother who was watching them closely, with shining eyes and a straight face. "Can I get it mom?"

"Of course you can," Serena told her smiling gently, her eyes darting to Nate and then back to her daughter. "Just tell me what else you want and I'll get it for you while you're out with Nate."

"Actually," Nate said staring at Serena. "Since you're here, I think we should talk," he said watching her as she nodded slightly. "If you don't mind of course," he said to Summer who shrugged and grinned.

"It's cool with me, grandma and I can manage," Summer said looking to Lily who smiled in agreement.

"Great," Nate said digging in his pocket and pulling out his card. "Here, get whatever you want on me."

"Nate," Serena started, trying to stop him but Nate just looked at her, a silent plea to let him do this because he could and he never was able to before.

"Really?" Summer asked, looking between parents as she took the card. When her mom nodded she squealed and hugged her dad. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

"We'll meet up with you guys in about an hour," Nate told Lily and Summer and then looked toward Serena. "Shall we?"

"We shall," Serena said trying to muster up a smile as the nerves took over and her heart beat out of her chest. "Be good for Grandma," she told Summer and then looked to her mother for confirmation that she could handle the 12 year old, to which Lily rolled her eyes and glared at Serena for having such little faith in her.

"Take your time," Summer called smiling to herself as her parents walked out of the store together. _Her parents_, that was such a weird concept for her, it was always her mom, _just_ her mom, it made her giddy. "What?" she asked when she turned to see her grandmother watching her.

"Oh nothing," Lily said smiling. "Come on, these clothes aren't going to try themselves on."

* * *

Serena wrapped her arms around her body and held on tight as she walked down the street with Nate, it had been at least 10 minutes since they left her mother and Summer and he still hadn't said anything to her. She kept chewing on her bottom lip as she waited for him to speak remembering their last conversation when he was so angry with her, she thought he'd never speak to her again.

She kept her eyes straight ahead of her easily keeping up with his pace, having to make an effort to slow herself down when her nervousness caused her to speed up. 'This is ridiculous,' she thought to herself as she took a breath to calm herself down. 'It's Nate and no matter how much he hates you, you didn't do this to hurt him, he just needs to understand that.'

"I think we should be able to be civil with each other for Summers sake," Nate said finally, breaking the silence, Serena furrowed her eyebrows she didn't know that she was being anything but civil. "I know she doesn't want all this fighting and the two of us ignoring each other, and I don't want it to affect her, so, truce?"

Serena looked from his face down to his outstretched hand and blinked, she was frozen for a moment as she remembered his voice when he said '_if I decide to ever speak to you again_'_._

"Is something wrong?" Nate asked raising an eyebrow and Serena furrowed hers. The edge in his voice gave away the anger he was trying to hide away under his calm expression, even his eyes, usually the only thing she needed to look at to know exactly what he was thinking, was controlled. "This doesn't mean that we're going to be best friends or anything like what you remember from 13 years ago, it just means that we have a daughter and we are adults, for her sake we need to start acting like it."

"Ok," she said only trusting herself to utter that one word without her voice breaking and shook his hand. She kept her arms wrapped around her as they walked, Nate wasn't even looking her way, it was like she wasn't even there. "Nate I'm sorry."

"I don't want to hear it Serena," he said without missing a beat and Serena flinched. "It's done, whatever happened in the past is over, whatever lie you had to tell yourself to make this seem like it was the right decision is over, all I want now is to have a relationship with my daughter and for her to know that even though I really don't want to talk to you anymore, I will because its what she wants."

Serena clenched her jaw and shook her head, he was making her angry in a way that he was never able to do and she thought maybe it would take some time but eventually that boy she left behind would forgive her but he isn't that boy anymore and this man in front of her was pretending like she was just a surrogate to his child.

"I was 15 Nate," she exploded and stopped moving, surprising herself and a few people walking past them as well. Nate glared at whoever stopped to watch them before looking back at her. "I was 15," she repeated softer. "I was just 3 years older than Summer is right now, I was scared, you were with Blair, your family was already expecting you to give her the vander Bilt ring, my parents were so far out of my reach that I didn't know who else to run to but my grams, everything felt like it was going to fall completely apart at any given moment and the only thing I wanted was to keep you out of that firing line, to give you the best chance at a normal life."

"A normal life?" Nate said with a dark chuckle and Serena bit her lip. "As decided by you, Serena, I should have had the choice to decide whether I wanted to be a part of her life or not, I should have been the one to decide what a normal life was for me."

"I know what you would have done Nate," Serena said trying to keep her voice controlled. "All I'm saying is that you were 15, you would have grown to resent me for keeping you away from doing the things that you've done without knowing about us, it was too much."

"Again, Serena you should have let me decide this," Nate gritted out. "I would have given up _everything_ for you and I wouldn't have looked back, I wouldn't have resented you and you know that's the truth, so what was it that kept you from New York all these years."

"I didn't know that ok," Serena said the tears threatening to fall down her face as she stared up at him. "I loved you but you were _Blair's_, I knew you loved me but if there was a choice I knew that you would choose her, I didn't want you to be with me for the baby and then 10 years later wonder what it would have been like to have a baby with her."

Nate's hard expression softened just a little bit but he didn't make a move to comfort her or say anything to interrupt her.

"It was selfish of me to keep her instead of giving her to that family but I couldn't give you up, especially not in that way," Serena said, the tears falling freely now. "I feel the guilt and the pain and the longing for what could have been every single time I look into those big blue eyes of hers, _your eyes,_ and sometimes I wish I did things differently."

"That doesn't help me get back the years I lost with her," Nate said in a low voice, the bitterness in his voice not as strong as he thought it would be because seeing her in tears was tearing him apart.

"I know it doesn't Nate and I know you don't want to hear this but I did the right thing back then, I have to believe that," she said taking a shaky breath and waiting a moment before continuing. "I just ... I watched my parents fall apart, they had me when they were so young and all that love they thought they had, the family obligation, the good intentions, wasn't enough to keep them from abandoning their children so they could get back the years they lost when they had to take care of me."

"I am not your father Serena," Nate said and Serena could see the anger at the implied comparison but there was also some spark of understanding beneath that. "I would never have done what he did."

"I couldn't take that risk with her Nate," she said shaking her head and Nate threw his head back and laughed humourlessly before looking back to her.

"When we spoke I told Summer that I believe you when you said you were trying to protect us by keeping this secret," he said and she looked up in shock. "And I do Serena, I knew who you were then but that doesn't mean I understand why you felt like you had to."

"I don't know how else to explain it Nate," she said shaking her head. "There's nothing else that I can say about my decisions to make you understand."

"I don't even think I want to understand," Nate said throwing his arms out and then rubbing his face. "I just want to be able to talk to you without getting angry."

"What do you need me to do?" Serena asked softly wiping her wet cheeks.

"I don't know S," Nate said shaking his head and looking past her to the cluster of shops they were heading to when she stopped him and Serena's mouth twitched into a smile, no one beside Erik had called her S in 13 years.

"I think we just have to give it time Nate," Serena said looking down and wrapping her arms back around herself.

"Are you taking her back to LA?" Nate asked and Serena nodded slowly.

"School starts up again in a month, I'm going to make it her decision on whether she wants to stay here or return to LA," Serena said and Nate furrowed his eyebrow as he stared at her. "I've spoken to the head master at Constance Billard, she's agreed to accept my late application."

"Does she know?" Nate asked, referring to Summer.

"Not yet, I didn't get a chance to tell her," Serena said with a smile as she looked up at Nate.

"I'm taking her for breakfast tomorrow," Nate said and Serena raised an eyebrow because that's what he did every morning. "Chuck and Blair will be there," he continued and Serena's eyebrow went up even higher if that was possible. "I think you should come too." Serena was pretty sure if she could raise her eyebrows any higher they'd fly off her face.

"You what?" she asked confused and Nate chuckled, one of those amused Nate-like chuckles he used to give her before he found out what she did.

"I think you should join us," he repeated and Serena grimaced at the thought of her and Blair at the same table after their last few run-ins. "Look Summer wants her parents to have a friendly relationship and this will show her that we're making an effort, Blair needs to see that as well for her to give up this hatred of you because of me and I it would make Chuck and my lives much easier if she had someone else to talk to."

Serena pressed her lips together as hard as she could to suppress her grin, Blair could be a handful when she wanted to be and there was no telling how much torture she'd put the boys through after Serena left especially since she felt that she only had the two of them to confide in. "Ok," Serena said. "I'll come with Summer in the morning."

"Great see you two tomorrow," he said starting to walk away from her.

"Wait, aren't you going to come back with me to see her," Serena asked, not willing to let go of the more light-hearted Nate that has finally graced her presence again, even if just for another moment. "She still has your card."

"She can give it to me tomorrow," Nate said shrugging when he turned back to her and Serena bit her lip. "How much damage can a 12 year old do, really?"

"Oh Nate the things you still need to learn", she mumbled to herself.

* * *

**A/N : Hey guys, I know I'm like super late with posting this but I was terrified of posting this chapter and it being disappointing, but today I read over it a few times, fixed the little mistakes and I was happy with it so I hope you guys are as well**

**For this story to continue, I needed Nate and Serena to have some sort of interaction, I thought maybe they stopped being angry too quickly but when I re-read it today, their conversation made sense with the way it went, after he heard her reasons he lost that burning anger and hopefully she explained her reasons better**

**I needed some kind of humor in there and Summer is my favorite person for that :D I am going to add the OC character tag into this description for her because she is basically one of my main characters**

**The next chapter brings our NJBC and kids together for a little awkwardness and breakfast lol so lets hope I can write that and post it soon**

**Side Note; Blake had a baby girl! Old news now I know coz the baby is like 2 months old already lol but I recently realized that she should have had her baby and googled it haha my fangirling has really slipped away from me**

**Anyway, Sorry for this massive AN please review and let me know your thoughts**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	13. Chapter 13

"Guys you all remember Serena," Nate said when Serena and Sumer showed up to the cafe that he and Summer went to every morning. "And this is Summer," he said pulling her in for a hug before introducing her to his other three favourite people in the world, even if she'd already met them before.

"But Summer is a season," Henry informed them frowning at her and Summer laughed at the little boys confusion, she got that alot, it was all kinds of confusing when they were learning about the seasons in school.

"It's my name too," Summer told him watching as he raised an eyebrow obviously not believing her. "You can call me Charlotte if you want, that's my middle name."

"My middle name is Bart -o- o- mew," Henry said trying to pronounce the middle name he inherited from his grandfather.

"Bartholomew," Chuck offered watching the boy with an amused expression and Henry nodded.

"Yeah, but no-one calls me that coz it's weird," Henry said scrunching up his nose a little and Blair rolled her eyes, no matter how many times she explained that it was a perfectly normal name passed down through the generations in the Bass family, Henry always just told everyone how 'weird' it was.

"That's a long name," Summer said, glad that her names were easy.

"It's my dad's dad's name," Henry said grinning at the way he said 'dad's dad's'.

"No way," Summer said gasping for effect and keeping up conversation with the little boy while their parents struggled to find things to talk about.

"So Nate where's Lola today?" Blair asked after she decided that the children were occupied enough and Nate raised an eyebrow at her because he was pretty sure she didn't care, Serena cleared her throat and adjusted herself in her seat next to him and it dawned on Nate that Blair was using Lola as a way to make Serena uncomfortable.

"She's spending the day with her parents," Nate said shooting Blair a look. "They're leaving New York tomorrow."

"Doesn't she work," Blair asked, her annoyance at anything Lola-related winning out over trying to make Serena feel bad about Nate moving on.

"She took the week of," Nate said, looking to Chuck for help but his best friend was helping Henry explain something to Summer.

"You don't sound like you like her very much," Serena commented and then wished she didn't as Blair turned her glare toward her.

"I like her more than I like you," Blair snapped. "Although at this point that really isn't that much."

Nate sighed and Chuck winced but continued to keep Summer and Henry talking to him. "Blair not now," he said pressing his fingers to his temples.

"Why not Nate?" she asked. "You know how I feel about her, how you feel about her, so why is she here?"

"Maybe I should go," Serena said softly making a move to stand and Nate grabbed her hand and held her in place before she moved.

"It's ok Serena," Chuck said but she barely registered it because her world was in slow motion and all she could feel was Nate's had on hers and his semi acceptance of her by not letting her leave. "Blair needs to realize this isn't all about her."

Blair turned to glare at her husband and Serena looked to Summer who had her eyebrows furrowed as she watched Chuck and Blair before moving her eyes toward her parents and gasping in delight when she saw their clasped hands. Nate let go of her hand as soon as he realized what Summer did and Serena held her breath for a moment longer as everything around her sped up again.

"Nathaniel, Henry wants to go onto 'The Charlotte' again soon and I'm sure you want to take Summer as well," Chuck said clearing his throat and taking the attention away from Blair. "We should try taking them this weekend."

"Charlotte's your middle name," Henry said beaming as he made the connection. "Like the boat."

"Yeah, I'm named after a season and a boat," Summer said dryly turning to look at her mother who shrugged. "I'm all kinds of weird too."

"I like it," Henry declared after thinking about it for a little while.

"I'm glad you approve," Summer said giggling.

"What do you think Summ?" Nate asked, glancing at his daughter. "You can finally see the boat you got your name from," he said dragging out the joke about her names.

"Sure," Summer said smiling wide and Serena bit her lip, this was the biggest and most she thinks she'd ever seen her daughter smile. Summer's smile dropped a little when she thought of something and she looked at her parents with questioning eyes. "Wait ... I wasn't conceived on that boat, was I?"

Nate choked on his coffee and Serena's eyes went wide, she needed to start listening to this kid's conversations with her friends. Chuck and Blair hid their laughs until Henry turned to them as asked what that meant.

* * *

Serena walked down the streets of Manhatten with a smile on her face, breakfast that morning had gone much better that she thought it would. After Summer's more than awkward question, they settled into a strange groove where Blair only hmph'ed and rolled her eyes on occasion and Chuck and Nate carried the conversation to the point where she could feel the familiarity of their friendship 13 years ago. It was only Henry and Summers welcome interruptions brought her back to the present and how it could possibly be in the future when they might be ok with each other.

As they were leaving Summer said goodbye to Chuck and Blair, calling them by their names only for Chuck to turn around and say 'that's Uncle Chuck to you' and then calling her 'sis' when he hugged her good bye. Never before had Serena been so grateful to have Chuck in her life, she thinks the 13 years she was gone had changed him the most and she wished she could have watched him grow into the amazing man he was today.

Serena took a breath as she opened the door of the cool office, checking her phone one last time to see if Summer had tried to get ahold of her before dropping it into her bag and zipping it shut. She left Summer with Jenny, Rufus' daughter had promised a day of fun, showing Summer what she did and the 12 year old was all for hanging out with someone other than her mother or uncle cooped up in her grandmothers apartment, which left Serena with nothing else to do but keep trying to rebuild all those burnt bridges.

"So it has occurred to me that I have been blaming you for something that has been my fault," Serena said leaning on the door to Blair's office, the brunette snapped her head up and stared at Serena suspiciously for a minute.

"How did you get in here?" she asked glaring down the hall to find her assistant flirting with the delivery guy. "I should really fire her."

"She's sweet," Serena said with a smile. "Got excited when I said I was Mr Bass' sister."

"You can't throw that title around if it isn't true," Blair said and Serena smirked and shrugged, her mother adopted Chuck, in the eyes of the law it was true enough. "Since you're here, you might as well shut the door, hopefully then she'll understand that it means 'do not disturb'."

"Are you busy?" Serena asked as she closed the door and walked toward Blair's desk. "I can come back later."

"I would say I'm always busy and that you should never come back but I'm curious because you are going to apologize," Blair said with a fake smile.

"You've taken over from your mother," Serena said looking around and smiling. "Just like you always wanted."

"You wanted to speak about something that's your fault," Blair prompted irritated and Serena took a breath. "Not rehash my past dreams."

"Yes, you shouldn't have told Summer who Nate was to her," Serena said and Blair looked like she was about to protest when Serena held up a hand. "But I was avoiding telling her the truth and she needed to know, so I'm sorry for ... attacking you after that."

"Not exactly the apology I was hoping for," Blair said tilting her head to the side and studying Serena. "Where is your teenage doppelganger?"

"With Jenny," Serena said laughing at the description and Blair's eyebrows shot to the top of her head. "She's being taught the art of ... whatever Jenny does."

"Rufus' daughter?" Blair asked and Serena nodded. "She had the biggest crush on Nate in high school."

"I'm sure," Serena said chuckling, she didn't know a girl in school that didn't have a crush on Nate.

"Nate and Chuck seem to think that I need to give you the benefit of the doubt," Blair said grudgingly, pushing her hair back. "Stop being so angry with you, they had enough to say about it this morning after we left."

"What do you think?" Serena asked, biting her lip as she waited for the answer.

"I think that you left me," Blair said and Serena winced. "Everyone just thinks that Nate was affected because he loved you and you left and you had his child but you also left me, I had no one to talk to when things with Chuck and Nate blew up in my face, my dad left, I got married, I had a _baby_ and I missed you."

"I know B," Serena said with tears in her eyes. "I missed you too."

"So yes Serena of course I'm angry with you," she said as if she didn't even hear Serena speak. "I got married and all I got from you was a card saying 'Congratulations – xoxo S', what was I supposed to feel, you're my best friend and you didn't even bother showing up for my wedding."

"Blair-" Serena started, wincing as she thought about how badly she wanted to be at Blair's wedding like they'd planned but she couldn't face Nate with Summer.

"At least no one really noticed, since you'd been MIA for such a long time before that, you know what the worst part was?" she asked and Serena shook her head. "Not that you weren't around every single time I needed you because the boys picked up your slack there but I had to make _Penelope_ my maid of honour."

Serena pressed her lips together and took a few quick breathes to stop the laughter from slipping through her lips, "I bet she was thrilled," Serena said and Blair shot her a look before both girls burst out laughing.

"She got to walk down the aisle, arm in arm with Nate, of course she was thrilled," Blair said laughing and shaking her head at the memory. "You just ... you missed so much."

"I didn't want to," Serena said looking down. "I have so much to make up for, I missed you the most when Summer was a baby, she had the cutest clothes and every time I went shopping for her I thought about what you'd say about the outfits I bought, which headband you'd choose to go with the stockings she was wearing that day, and then over the years I just ... stopped, I pushed New York out of my mind."

"Until you came back," Blair finished and Serena nodded. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Do you remember what you were like back then with Nate?" Serena asked and Blair winced. "You would have probably ignored me for 13 years anyway, a few years ago I was really dead set on coming home and telling Nate and then I went to tell Summer and she must have been about 6 and I froze and I just sat there for an hour watching her play and hoping she would forgive me one day."

"And she has?" Blair asks and Serena nodded. "I wouldn't have forgiven my mother."

"Summer is different from us, she's forgiving," Serena said biting her lip. "I don't think I would be able to forgive my mother either."

"There's also the fact that this is the only time you've ever actually let her down," Blair said. "Unlike our mothers and their multiple disappointments."

"I can't believe that it's been so long and bitching about our mothers is still the thing that we bond over," Serena said and Blair grinned.

"Are we bonding?" Blair asked raising her eyebrow and Serena shrugged, they kinda were. "When I stopped hoping that you would come back home, I decided that if you ever did come home I would not acknowledge you, I wouldn't care and then you dropped Summer on us and there was no way I could let it go, you had to suffer for it."

"Have I suffered enough?" Serena asked.

"You'll never have suffered enough for all those years," Blair said shaking her head. "But I think I've missed you too much and making you suffer is making me suffer and I don't want my niece to think of me as that awful lady married to her Uncle Chuck."

"I wouldn't have let her think that," Serena said smiling softly at Blair. "She's a good judge of people and I've told her not to judge the situation with us just yet."

"Nate said she immediately didn't like Lola," Blair said with a laugh. "She's the best judge of character in my book."

"Lola seems ... nice," Serena said and Blair rolled her eyes.

"Oh please Serena, that fake nice would have never fooled you if you hadn't stayed away from New York for so long," Blair said and Serena laughed, it wasn't a jab at her, it was just a Blair-fact. "Besides she's horrible for Nate."

"Oh?" Serena asked, not wanting to ask too much and give away her longing for Nate, when did she turn back into a teenager.

"Of course not and Nate's just too dumb to realize he's been using her as a substitute you," Blair said causing Serena to raise her eyebrows. "Don't look at me like that, I know you've thought about it too."

Serena laughed and shook her head, watching as Blair switched off her computer and grabbed her handbag. "What are you doing?"

"I'm taking the day of," she said standing up and walking around the desk to pull Serena with her. "There's no way I'm getting any work done when we have some catching up to do."

* * *

**A/N : I cant even begin to tell you how sorry I am for leaving this story for a whole month but real life can really suck sometimes and I have work and assignments piling up, I feel so over worked, I have written as much as I possibly could of this story which was this chapter lol which I loved coz it made me laugh so I hope it makes you laugh too **

**I have 2 weeks of assignment hell to get through so I cannot promise you guys an update for at least 2 weeks but I will try my hardest**

**I love the reviews and that you guys love this story too, keep it up hehe**

**Ok let me know what you think of Summer and gang and if you think I resolved everything with Blair too soon coz i resolved quote a bit with Nate last chapter, personally I feel that it could work like this**

**Please review and let me know all your thoughts**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	14. Chapter 14

"Ok grandma, not that I don't love big ballrooms and pretty decorations," Summer said as she surveyed the room. "But what exactly am I doing here?"

"Cotillion?" Serena asked from behind her and Summer raised looked at them confused. "I completely forgot about it."

"Yes, well darling, you missed yours," Lily said and Serena thought back to where she was when her cotillion was happening.

"Summer would have been about 4 months old," Serena said scratching her chin in thought and then she looked at her daughter. "When were you born again?"

Summer glared at her mother for a few moments before turning to her grandmother again, "What is it?"

"It's a debutant ball, girls and boys are taught to dance in the correct way, there are many other etiquette classes they have to take as well before the ball and their introduction to society," Lily said smiling as a group of teenagers walked into the hall.

"Grams used to make me go for those," Summer said watching the group of teenagers and hiding herself further behind her mother.

"She isn't anything like you at all," Lily commented with a laugh, noting how at Summer's age, Serena was all about hanging out with the older kids, while Nate would shy away from them unless Chuck was with him.

"What are you talking about?" Serena asked and her mother just shook her head.

"Ah look my helpers are here," Lily said waving over Chuck, Blair and Nate. "I wonder where Henry is?"

"He has a play date that he couldn't get out of," Chuck said kissing his stepmothers cheek.

"We have work but I guess cotillion is more important," Nate complained looking over at Blair who glared at him.

"Of course it's important, these children need our guidance," she told him clapping her hands together and grinning. "Besides it's only a few hours, I checked your schedule, you were free this afternoon."

"Of course you did," Nate said chuckling and going to stand next to Serena. "I think she has a new favourite."

Serena grinned amusedly as Summer ignored everyone but Chuck after a quick greeting. "Well the Bass boys have worked their magic on her," Serena said. "She adores Henry."

"I think I'm glad there's such a big age gap between them," Nate said paling and Serena laughed.

"Age is just a number Natie," Serena said and both of them froze at the long forgotten nickname before Nate cleared his throat.

Before either could say another word her mother was calling her and Nate forward to join the group of teenagers in front of her.

"I have a treat for you today," she told the kids. "My daughter Serena and Nathaniel here, were partners in most of their dances since they were about 4 was it darling?"

"I think so," Serena said slowly, trying to jump onto her mothers train of thought. "Chuck and Blair were dance partners as well."

"Yes but the two of you had such grace, no-one could ever replicate in all my years of being part of this committee," Lily said placing her palms on her chest and looking away as if lost in a memory and Serena frowned. "Do you remember the dances?"

"A few," Serena said looking at Nate who shrugged, obviously not getting what her mother was getting at or just not paying enough attention. Blair on the other hand was biting her lip to hide her smirk while Summer was smiling so wide Serena could count all her teeth. "I'm not dancing."

"Just one dance," Lily encouraged. "Just to show the kids what they need to aim for."

"Cotillion is in 2 weeks, I don't think watching us dance is going to change much," Serena said trying her hardest not to glare at her mother and completely avoiding looking at Nate.

"But we want to see what we're supposed to look like," one of the kids said and Serena looked over to find a bunch of bobbing heads agreeing with the speaker.

"Yeah S, they all want to see," Blair said reaching forward to push Serena toward Nate. "Show them."

"It's been years since I've danced, I'll probably end up stepping on Nate's toes," Serena said with a nervous laugh looking at Nate who had an almost horrified look on his face.

"Come on mom, dad," Summer said in her pleading voice and giving them her best puppy eyes. "Please, I've never seen you dance together before and I'd really like it."

Serena raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms, she knew that look and she wasn't going to fall for it. She and Nate had just started talking again, he finally stopped looking at her with all the hate he could muster up and while she definitely didn't mind dancing with Nate, she wasn't going to be forced to dance with a man who was not ready to dance with her. But before she could pull Summer away and tell her this, Nate's hand appeared next to her and he nodded his head to the dance floor.

"We can't let her down," Nate said and Summer smiled triumphantly. Blair looked down at Summer impressed and Serena cringed, she always wondered when her grandmothers meddling was going to show up in her daughter. "We did this dance so many times as children I don't think you could ever forget it, no matter how many years you've been lost."

Serena swallowed hard and glanced at Nate's outstretched hand, it had amazed her at how easily their friendship was coming back, it was still fragile but it wasn't like he needed to force himself to be calm around her anymore, she was afraid of pushing his limits too much but here he was offering to test those limits.

How could she refuse?

Serena placed her hand in his and let him lead her out to the middle of the room, she could see her mother making dramatic hand gestures to the teenager by the sound system and Summer beaming at them from the sidelines and discretely bumping fists with Chuck. Of course.

"Are you ok?" Nate asked and Serena snapped her focus back to him and it was like the world around them disappeared and they were teens again, making fun of the dances and how serious their friends took it and how difficult it was for them to get through an entire song without messing up, while Serena and Nate flowed with the music, never missing a step.

"Just thinking back to practices," Serena said trying her hardest not to gasp and keep her face neutral as he placed his hand on her hip. "Do you remember when Blair almost made Robert Taylor quit when he dropped her?"

"She was so happy to be done with that partnership ... until your mother made Chuck take his place," Nate said chuckling, stepping back as the music started.

"She didn't talk to me for a week after that because I had you as my partner and she had the Basshole," Serena said and Nate snorted.

"Blair has always had a way with words," he said loosening his grip of her waist and then spinning her. Serena smiled wide as she twirled, she loved doing this dance and watching the skirt of her dress when she moved.

"You know that Summer tricked you with her puppy dog eyes and sweet voice to get you to dance right?" Serena asked and to her surprise, Nate grinned, the laugh lines around his eyes deepening.

"She got that from you," he said softly looking down at their feet for a moment before catching himself and straightening his back again. "I could never resist that face."

Serena cleared her throat but before she could say anything Nate had both hands on her waist and she remembered just in time that she needed to help him out, placing both her hands on his shoulders and jumping up so he could hold her above the ground because he couldn't carry her just like that. Nate held her eyes as he brought her back down, the moment seeming to last forever when in fact it was barely 5 seconds.

"Blair seems to have gotten over things," Nate commented clearing his throat and Serena laughed, no longer needing to focus on her steps and just letting Nate lead her. "When did that happen?"

"After breakfast the other day, I apologized," she said and Nate raised an eyebrow. "And then we went shopping."

"Of course, everything can be solved when the two of you are shopping," Nate said rolling his eyes and Serena grinned, it always confused Chuck and Nate when they were younger how they could get over these huge problems after a shopping trip.

"It's the best form of therapy," she reminded him.

"I'm going to spin you twice and then let go," he said, warning her, no matter how many times they practised it, he never forgot to remind her. Serena bit her lip as she spun, she wondered if this looked as graceful as she knew it did back when they were teens. He let go of her hand and she twirled to face him, both bowing as the last notes of the song played out.

Nate stood up straight and reached out to take her hand, when she straightened, walking back to the group of cheering teenagers and her family, Summer already pushing her way between them and babbling excitedly about how amazing they were.

"That, children, is how you dance at cotillion," Blair said, clapping twice and then shooing them all onto the dance floor to practise. She turned to them with a smile on her face that immediately dropped into a scowl when she caught a glimpse of something behind Serena. "Oh joy."

"What?" Serena asked laughing at Blair's expression.

"Oh nothing interesting," she said sighing and Serena turned and winced. "Nathaniel, your cater waiter is here."

Nate looked at her confused for a moment before catching sight of Lola and rushing to her. "She doesn't look very happy," Serena commented, wrapping her arms around Summer, who had her eyes on her father and his girlfriend.

"She never looks happy," Blair grumbled, watching the mass of teenagers try to keep up with the music and then gasped when one of the boys dropped his partner after lifting her too high. "Stop the music."

Summer put her hands over her mouth and tried to hide her giggles but Serena could feel her body shaking. "Was he trying to throw her?" she asked and Serena shook her head.

"I saw your little fist bump with Chuck," Serena said pulling away and holding the girls hands out in front of her. "What was that about?"

"It's a secret," Summer said grinning.

"I thought we didn't keep secrets from each other," Serena said frowning.

"Well you should have known better," Summer said shrugging her shoulders and giving her mother a playful look. "I mean you were bringing me to New York, the heart of all secrets and lies."

"I'm keeping you far away from Chuck," Serena grumbled and Summer laughed and looked back around her mother to Nate and Lola. "Stop looking at her like you can make her disappear."

"Uncle Chuck said it wouldn't be very hard to do," Summer said and Serena sighed, reaching out to grab her child's shoulders and turn her around to face the dance floor.

"_Uncle_ Chuck and I are going to have a talk about these idea's he's giving you," Serena told her. "Where is he anyway?"

"Grandma Lily has him controlling the music," Summer said pointing to where Chuck stood looking like he could kill his step-mother and wife for dragging him out here instead of just letting him stay at work.

"That would have been Erik's job if he were here," Serena said, thinking her brother was lucky he had an excuse to miss this, he had decided that she and Summer didn't need him to be there as backup or a safety net so he called up his friends and they were leaving that afternoon for a holiday before college started up again. "So tell me, child of mine, what did you think this dance would accomplish?"

"Exactly what it accomplished," Summer said and Serena frowned. "Don't worry about it too much mom, it'll give you more wrinkles."

Serena's mouth fell open as Summer patted her hand and ran out to stand by her grandmother and critique the teenagers.

"What's up with you?" Blair asked coming back to Serena after making sure there were no sprained ankles or broken bones from the fall.

"I think my daughter just said I look old," Serena said reaching up to touch her face. "Do I have wrinkles?"

"If you keep your face scrunched up like that you will," Blair said and Serena immediately relaxed her face, moving her jaw around a little.

"Is it just me or is she trying to get Nate and I to do things together and Chuck is helping," Serena said turning to Blair who shrugged lightly.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said and Serena rolled her eyes, Blair knew exactly what she was talking about. "Trust the kid, she's got good instincts."

"You are no help," Serena mumbled and Blair smiled.

"I'm all the help you need S," she said cryptically.

* * *

**A/N : Hey guys here's chapter 14! Assignment week turned into assignment month and I'm so stressed its not even funny but I took a break and wrote and i got fluff lol its about time I start moving this story along but I'm enjoying the fluffy cute stuff**

**Anyway hope you guys enjoy this, I need to get back to my next assignment**

**Please review and let me know what you think, thank you so much for the reviews, you guys are awesome**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	15. Chapter 15

"Do you have to go?" Summer asked through her yawn as they sat on a couch in the lobby in her mother's building. Since she was still supposed to be running her grandmothers business (technically now hers), Serena had meetings that could not be postponed just because she was in New York for an extended time.

"I do, but it's only a 2 hour flight away, I will be back before you know it, hopefully in time to tuck you in," she said brushing back her daughters hair with her fingers as the girl leaned sleepily against her mother's side. "You could always come with me," Serena offered.

Summer opened one eye to look up at her mother as she seriously considered it. "But you'd be in meetings all day and I'd be bored."

"That's true and Nate's pretty excited to have you all to himself the whole day, without me being too close by," Serena said and Summer nodded yawning again, it was still much too early for her to be awake. "If there are any problems, I'm just a phone call away, I kinda wish Erik was still in the city."

"It's ok, I can call grandma Lily if I need to but I'll be with dad so I'll be fine," Summer said and Serena smiled and rubbed her arm. "It's so weird, last month I didn't even want to be in the same room as Grandma Lily and now I'm calling her if I have problems."

Serena chuckled as Summer made her observations, "I was like that with Grams, you'll get used to liking her soon enough," Serena told her and Summer 'hmph-ed' in response. Serena couldn't believe that it had been such a short time since her return to New York, it felt like it had been so much longer.

"Come on baby, time for me to leave," Serena said nudging Summer to wake up and handing her bags to Vanya to put into the town car that finally pulled up in front of the building to take her to the airport. Summer stood with her mother wrapping her arms around Serena's waist and holding her. "Summ, I need to go."

"But dads not here yet," Summer complained and Serena frowned, Nate as supposed to meet them in the lobby of her mothers building and get Summer from her before she left but he wasn't there yet. "I don't want to wait here alone and I don't wanna go _all_ the way back up to grandmas."

"You can wait here with Vanya," Serena said glancing at her watch, if she didn't leave soon she was going to miss her flight. "Let me call him, he's probably still asleep."

Serena was about to call Nate to get him up when he came barreling in through the door, looking like he just ran from his house to get there. "Sorry, I overslept," he said apologizing and then he looked from Serena down to their daughter still wrapped around Serena's waist. "She doesn't want you to go?"

"She's fast asleep," Serena said shaking her head and nudging the child. "Nate's here, honey."

Summer made a grunting noise and turned her face in Nate's general direction but her eyes were firmly shut. Nate chuckled and gently pried Summer away from Serena and into his arms, bending slightly so he could heave her into his arms. "It's been a while since I've carried anyone heavier than Henry but I'm sure I can manage carrying a 12 year old to the car," he said adjusting her so her head was on his shoulder and Serena handed him Summers bag.

"Twelve and a half," she mumbled and Serena let out a startled laugh.

"She's heavy, you could just turn her in the direction you need her to go and she'll walk," Serena told him because while Summer was still tiny enough to be carried by Nate without it being too awkward or even looking awkward, she was much too old to be carried around.

"It's fine," Nate said, rocking slightly on his heels and Serena knew that he was just happy to be able to carry her while he still could, after missing out on all those times when she was younger.

"I need to go, have fun," she said kissing Summer's head and thanking Nate again before rushing to the taxi. It was only when she waved to Nate as the taxi pulled away did she realize how domestic that scene was, trading Summer between them. She smiled to herself and leaned her head back onto the headrest, it was more than she expected from him and she was so thankful he was who he was.

* * *

Summer frowned as she watched her dad and Lola being cute in the kitchen when she woke up later that morning, they hadn't seen her yet but she stood in the passage where she had a full view of the common rooms in the house.

When she woke up, it took her a few minutes to realize that she wasn't at her grandmothers or at her house but at her dads house, she assumed it was a spare room because it wasn't very personal, it took her a few excited moments to calm down and look around before getting up to go find him and that's when she stumbled upon ... that.

Lola was dangling a piece of what she could only assume was bacon over her father's mouth and he was trying to catch it, when he finally did they shared a kiss and Summer made a disgusted face and shivered uncomfortably before making herself known.

"G'morning," she said walking toward them, Lola said hello and then went back to the frying pan and Nate ran to her.

"Good morning sunshine," he said gathering her up in a tight hug and Summer laughed.

"Morning daddy," she said sweetly, noticing Lola roll her eyes out of the corner of her eye. "You're in a good mood."

"I have my two favorite girls with me today," he said ruffling her already messy hair and pulling her to the one of the chairs at the table. "Don't tell Blair I said that though, I'd like to keep my head."

"What are we doing today babe," Lola said setting the bacon on the table and sitting next to Nate, her arm draped possessively over his shoulders and Summer raised her eyebrows, this lady had deeper issues than she thought, her aunt Blair wasn't kidding.

"I thought we'd let Summer decide," Nate said watching his daughter. "But if you didn't have any plans already, I'd like to introduce you to my parents and a little more of my side of the family."

Summer paled at the mention of her grandparents, she'd never met them, her dad barely spoke about them but every time she brought them up in conversation people always had a grim expression on their faces and that made her very nervous. "Yeah sure I'd love to," Summer said swallowing hard, she was terrified but the smile on her dads face was worth it.

* * *

"Am I supposed to be a normal 12 year old? Am I supposed to look like I was already 16 like those pictures of you when you were 12 or should I be dressed like Aunt Blair at 12, because I do not think I could wear stockings without ripping them," Summer asked her mother as she stared at the mess of clothes now piled up on her bed. "I didn't pack for this, maybe I should go back to grandma's and-"

"Honey, Summer, stop," Serena said putting a hold on whatever rant her daughter was getting into. "First you need to take a breath and then you need to explain to me exactly why I was pulled out of my meeting to consult you on clothes."

"I'm sorry," Summer said deflating as she collapsed onto her bed and all the clothes. "Was it important?"

"It was," Serena said. "But you did me a huge favor, I think I might have strangled one of those old men if I didn't leave, so I owe you one."

Summer giggled and Serena smiled on her side. "Mom, I'm really nervous, dad's taking me to meet his parents," Summer whispered. "What if they hate me? I mean you would have told dad if you thought they'd approve."

"You're a really hard person to hate Summer," Serena said, trying to ease the girls worries while having the same thoughts running through her head because Anne Archibald and William van der Bilt were not the most welcoming and accepting people. "They have no reason to disapprove of you."

"Lola hates me," Summer mumbled and Serena sighed, choosing not to say anything this time. "I really don't like her."

"I know honey, I've heard you say it at least once a day since you met her," Serena said rolled her eyes and Summer grunted. "But this isn't about Lola, Nate's family will accept you because you are their blood and if anything they are fiercely protective over their blood."

"You make it sound like they're vampires," Summer mumbled and Serena shook her head, laughing.

"You will be fine," Serena assured her, hoping that Nate knew what he was doing. "Go, have fun, try not to scare them," she said and Summer giggled. "I love you."

"Love you more," Summer said softly as the call cut, she bit her lip and sunk down to the floor. Why did she agree to do this without her mother at her side? As much as it was exciting to know her father and do things with him, her mom was all she's ever known and that's who she needs when she's afraid and nervous.

Summer dressed quickly into jeans and a pretty blouse and ballet pumps, it wasn't that casual and it wasn't formal, she felt as if maybe she could fit into the upper east side dressed like this, it wasn't too different from her normal. She wanted her dads family to like her, she didn't want to come across as trying too hard and she wanted him to be happy, more importantly she wanted him to be happy with her in his life and this was step one.

"Is that what you're going to wear?" Lola asked from the door and Summers head snapped up to look at her in the mirror. "It's a little casual."

"I'm twelve, I'm allowed," Summer snarled, glaring at the woman leaning smugly against her doorway, dressed in a tight knee length green dress and heels. "Why are you so dressed up?"

"I'm visiting my future in-laws," Lola said grinning at her. "I can't go looking like a heathen."

'A what?' Summer mouthed to herself, stiffing the urge to scream. "Is this the first time you're meeting them or something?" Summer asked raising an eyebrow and turning to face Lola instead of scrutinizing her 'casual' look any longer.

"I've met them before, they love me but I have a feeling something special is going to happen," she said looking very pleased with herself as she clasped her hands together and sighed dreamily. "I think I might be able to officially call them my in-laws after today."

Before Lola could look back Summer made a gagging face and shivered, why was this lady talking to her about this right now. "There's no ring on your finger just yet," Summer said and Lola gave her a knowing look. "And if it were up to me there never would be, at least not from my dad."

"Oh sweetie, the things you think you can control," she said and Summer ground her teeth together, today was not the day for this crazy lady to be pushing her. "He isn't even your dad, not really, you may share blood but he's only been in your life a couple of weeks, you don't have a strong enough bond to stop this."

Summer took two deep breaths and thought about her mothers pep talks about dealing with Lola, to control herself before the smug look on Lola's face became too much for her temper to handle. She was about to scream when Nate walked into the room and flashed them both a megawatt smile.

"Nice to see you two talking," he said smiling at the both of them and the fight left Summer just like that. Lola was right, he still didn't know her well enough to believe her if she had to tell him that Lola was a bitch and she didn't want them together but he was her dad and she was determined not to let him make a mistake.

"I was just telling Summer that she should dress up a little more for our trip today, darling," Lola said and Nate looked at her weirdly before walking up to Summer and holding her out in front of him to see what she was wearing.

"I think what she's wearing is perfect," he said and Summer smiled relieved and tucked herself against her fathers side, grinning up at Lola who looked like she would have stuck her tongue out at the girl if Nate wasn't there. "Come on, let's go if we want to spend some time there before we have to leave again."

Summer tensed as she was lead out of the room toward the door and Nate slowed his pace to match hers, stopping completely when she slowed down enough and gently cupped her elbows.

"I know you're nervous," he told her as reassuringly as possible. "But they know about you and they are excited to meet you, you have nothing to worry about."

Summer took a deep breath and smiled, that made her feel better. Not alot better but a little better coming from him. Nate threw his arm around her shoulder and pulled her with him to where Lola was waiting with an annoyed look on her face and Summer wiggled her eyebrows, whatever 'bond' Lola thought was missing was being formed faster than she anticipated and Summer was planning on rubbing that in her face as much as possible.

* * *

**A/N : So I wanted to have the next chapter done before I posted this but that chapter is going nowhere so I thought I'd rather post this now before I forget and it goes over a month that I haven't posted!**

**I really hope you guys like this chapter, I think I said a while back that I wanted to bring Nates family in for their bit of drama lol but I don't know yet how I want them to receive Summer, what do you guys think? Will they accept her and love her or will they just be cold to her and only tolerate her for Nate? If you have any other reactions, that would be a huge help**

**I've been feeling like Nate and Summer took to each other too easily and they have that father daughter relationship just like that, so in this chapter I sort of had Summer be a little uncomfortable with him, not in any huge way but just so that we see how close she and Serena actually are**

**ok this has gone on forever, please review and let me know your thoughts**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	16. Chapter 16

Summer put her elbow on the table and propped her chin on her hand as she watched all the people around the table, she was feeling a little overwhelmed, this was her family now, she didn't know what it was like to have a huge family. It had always been her mom, Uncle Erik and Grams, grandma Lily would stop by every couple of months but that was it, it was just them. Now she had her dad and both his parents, and his grandfather and his cousins, there was only one cousin here now but according to her new grandmother there were a lot of them left for her to meet.

They got through quite a few questions after she got there, asking her about her interests and school and all her friends, she answered with the simplest answers she could, not elaborating unless they asked her to and trying to sink into the couch so that the attention would divert from her. They didn't ask any questions about her mother and she was pretty happy with that because she didn't know what she would say, her mom was sure they didn't like her so she really didn't want to make their impression of her worse by saying the wrong thing.

After her interrogation her grandmother moved them all to the dining room table for lunch, she was so nervous she barely ate. They were still seated at the table even after everything had been cleared, she didn't know if they could sense her unease by the attention or if they'd gotten bored of her but they all left her alone and went on with their own conversations, leaving her to watch them.

Her dad was next to her in conversation with his grandfather, who she was also supposed to call Grandfather, he was old and stern and intimidating, he kept looking at her like he was trying to figure her out and it was nerve wrecking. She wondered if he ever smiled, her dad was really excited to introduce her to him but she wasn't sure that the feeling was reciprocated.

On Grandfather's other side was his cousin Tripp, he was nice enough, he looked stressed all the time, as if he were just waiting for something to blow up. Although that could also just be because of his wife Maureen, Summer thought smiling to herself, she had him on a tight leash. Maureen was a hard woman to read, she kept this permanent fake smile on her face, she and Lola seemed to be the best of friends which immediately gave Summer a bad impression of her.

Finally sitting across from her were the people she was most excited to meet, Anne and Howard Archibald, who she now called Grandma Anne and Grandpa or gramps or even Captain because he didn't really care about all those other terms. Her grandfather was loud and energetic, he made her feel completely at ease when everyone was watching her and always gave her an out when they asked her questions she couldn't answer, even though her dad seemed oddly weary of him.

Her grandmother was the complete opposite she was quiet and regal, Summer could watch her the whole day, she never let her posture drop and she did everything in the most ladylike way possible. Even though she looked unsure of Summer at first, she now looked like she was excited with the prospect of being a grandmother, even if she missed out on the exciting baby years.

"Summer, how do you feel about horse riding?" Howard booming voice asked, breaking her concentration and disrupting everyone's conversations so all the attention was on the two of them. "We could take the horses for a spin if you'd like, leave all these oldies to their conversations."

"Howard, you don't take horses for a spin," Anne told him and then looked to Summer. "But we could go down to the stables and if you want to ride one then you can."

"I'd like that," Summer said laughing at the incredulous look her grandmother was shooting her grandfather.

"It sounds fun, lets go," Nate said standing up so he could stretch.

"Nathaniel, I think your father meant for just Summer to come with us," Anne said and Nate frowned at his mother.

"Yeah Nate, how are we going to get to know the girl with you hovering," Howard said with a teasing look on his face and Nate rolled his eyes.

"Oh I see how it is," Nate said shaking his head. "You find out you have a granddaughter and forget about your son."

"That is exactly how it is," Howard said jumping up and extending his hand to Anne so he could help her up. Summer knew her grandparents got divorced when her dad was still in high school and only recently got back together and remarried but the way they acted now made her question how they could have possible gotten divorced in the first place, they were adorable for old people, they kinda reminded her of grandma Lily and Rufus.

"Too bad, you'll have to save your bonding session for another day," Nate said hooking his arms under Summer's arms and pulling Summer to stand up, making her laugh. "It's been a while since I've been out here."

"Very well then," Anne said faking her exasperation, Summer could see the smile playing on her lips and Howard was practically bouncing on the spot. "Father..."

"Another day," he said holding up a hand when Anne turned to him. She nodded and looked up at Tripp and the other two women at the time.

"I'm not dressed for the occasion," Lola said a little disappointedly and Summer smirked remembering their conversation about clothes before they left the city. Anne looked like she was going to say something but thought better of it and just nodded.

Tripp just shook his head and Maureen said something that sounded like she would prefer to gossip, but Summer barely heard that because her dad was dragging her out of the house already.

"Ah, I miss this place," he said when they stepped outside. "Fresh air, no noise, just nature."

"It's pretty," Summer said looking around. "It's so huge, I think I'd get lost here."

"I have, a few times," Nate said laughing. "Once it took me a few hours to find my way back, I don't think my mother let me out of her sight after that."

"Your nanny was fired after that," Anne said from behind them. "She should have known better than to let a 5 year old out of her sight."

"Oh look," Summer exclaimed when she saw the stables after walking for a little bit and the horses grazing, Anne had gotten the sable boy to get their horses ready for them in case they want to ride and Summer was just amazed that they had their own stables on the grounds and a full time stable boy. This place was basically a fully functional resort especially after her dad told her about the massive amount of staff Grandfather had working for him.

"What do you think?" Howard asked picking up the pace and dragging his wife behind him so she wouldn't slow them down with her slow steps. "Aren't they beauties?"

"Do you know how to ride by yourself Summ?" Nate asked, thinking that he really didn't know if she could or what kind of lessons she'd been to. Summer nodded at him as she reached out to stroke the horse that Anne was showing her. "Do you want to?"

"Yes please," she said with such a bright smile that no-one could deny her even if they tried.

Since the horses were already saddled up, Howard got them helmets and Anne quickly braided and pinned Summer's long hair up into a bun, to avoid getting it too tangled. Nate winked at her when he saw how excited she was with her grandparents fawning over her and Summer sent him a thumbs up.

They rode slowly, along the path that would take them around the grounds, Howard was riding in front with Summer, making her laugh and talking her ear off about boats and how he built 'The Charlotte' with Nate way back when, but Summer's attention was on her father and grandmother riding just behind them, talking quietly.

"Grandfather is just concerned that Serena was lying about the paternity and to be honest until I saw her I didn't believe it either," Anne was telling Nate, she didn't hear her dad's reply but it sounded like he was asking her what she thought now. "She's your daughter, I don't doubt it, she's absolutely gorgeous, I just wish Serena would have brought her to us sooner, we missed so much."

Summer blushed and nodded her head at her grandfather who didn't need her to comment on what he was saying but just give him cues to say that she was paying attention.

She was concentrating on too many things at once so she couldn't really catch everything her grandmother and father were talking about but she did get that her mother was not well liked right now and the family was a little worried about what a child might do to to Nate's life, she also found out that her grandmother didn't like Lola which gave her a smug feeling.

"I thought that Nate was calling us to say that he proposed to Lola when he said he has something life-changing to tell us," Howard said pulling Summer's attention to him and she raised her eyebrows. "He was planning on proposing to her soon but I think you just threw a wrench in that plan."

"I can have that effect," Summer said giggling and Howard laughed and nodded at her.

"Don't get me wrong, I think Lola is a doll but you are a much better surprise," Howard said and Summer beamed. "I can't believe your mother kept you away for so long."

"I don't think anyone can really believe that," Summer said softly, if her grandfather heard her he didn't let her know because he continued to talk.

"If she really wanted to keep you away I think we never would have known about you, she always was my favourite of Nate's friends," Howard said looking off into the distance and Summer raised her eyebrows. "If he had to have a child with someone, I'm glad it was her."

"Not Lola?" Summer asked because he did call her a doll and they were expecting her dad to propose to her

"As much as I like Lola, I don't think they're going to work," he said with a chuckle and Summer could have laughed. "It's been a few years and they still don't feel like a proper couple, look at me, I'm talking to my granddaughter about her father's relationships, you know one day we're going to look back on this and you're going to get me into trouble with your dad by telling him all this ..."

The sights around her made her lose concentration on both her grandparents conversations but she realized with a warm feeling in her stomach that they were both incredibly happy to have her as a granddaughter and even after only a few hours she was theirs and no-one would be able to take that away.

* * *

Nate was watching highlights from an earlier football game, it had been a long day at his grandfathers place, but it was a successful day so he couldn't complain, his family finally met his daughter and they loved her, as far as he could tell she was pretty happy with all of them, even Grandfather, he didn't get to ask her because Lola monopolized his attention on the ride back and Summer fell off to sleep before Lola was dropped off at her apartment for them to talk.

After horse riding, Nate let Summer 'bond' with his parents, he watched them show her things and play silly games that only a twelve year old child could come up with. He realized that Summer was more childish than Serena and Blair were at her age, she was happier and he was very thankful that Serena gave her the childhood that they never had.

They left just after dinner, even though his mother got as close to begging as she ever would for them to stay over but Nate knew that if Serena got back to New York that night Summer would be waiting to see her, he was already pushing it by taking the little girl so far away from everyone she knows, to meet family she didn't know existed. He was quite sure Blair would have screamed at him if he even considered putting her through that emotional distress.

There was a soft knock on the door as he was drifting off to sleep, frowning at the time, he got up and opened the door, not bothering to check who was knocking and fully intending to tell them off for knocking on his door at midnight.

Nate gasped when he saw Serena, who looked started that he opened the door so soon, her hand was up ready to knock again.

"Hi," she said lowering her hand and nervously pushing her hair back from her face. "I wasn't sure if you'd still be awake."

"It's past midnight Serena," Nate said trying not to sound annoyed by her. "What are you doing here?"

"I just got back to New York and I promised Summer I'd tuck her in when I got back, my mother said she decided to stay with you tonight," she said trailing off as if she were just realizing now exactly how late it was. "I should go, I'll see her in the morning."

"Serena wait," Nate said before she turned. "She's asleep right now but you can see her before you leave."

"Thanks," Serena said smiling at him and Nate got the impression that she barely spent a night away from Summer. He let her in and pointed her in the direction of the spare room in his apartment where their daughter was asleep. Serena smiled when she saw Summer sleeping, sprawled across the bed, her long hair was half in and half out of the messy braid she had most probably tied earlier that day, Serena shook her head knowing how tangled it was going to be when she woke up.

Serena pushed the little girls hair away from her face and pressed a kiss to her forehead, pulling the covers that had fallen away back up around her. Serena smiled at her sleeping girl who didn't even flinch when Serena touched her and turned around gasping when she saw Nate watching her from the doorway.

"She sleeps like you used to," Nate commented and Serena wished she could read his face, she had no idea what he was thinking. "Takes up the double bed even though she so tiny."

"Sleeping next to her is impossible," Serena said trying not to laugh, looking back at the 12 year old. "How did it go with your parents today?"

Nate tipped his head to the side to let her know that they should talk out of the room. "It went well, I don't think they believed I was telling the truth until they saw her," he said shaking his head. "Hot Chocolate?"

"Sure," Serena said trying not to show her surprise that he didn't just want her to leave already.

"Grandfather looks like he might require a DNA test or something but my mother might kill him if he asked," Nate said scratching his head. "She's more excited than I thought she would be especially with Summer's age and of course, our age when she was born."

"She can't be too happy with me," Serena mumbled sitting down on the couch, not realizing Nate heard her until he laughed to himself and shook his head no.

"I think if she never see's you again she'd be happy," Nate told her and Serena chuckled through a yawn. "My dad's so excited, he might kiss you for giving him a granddaughter."

"Really?" Serena asked, from what she could remember he was a very distant man, his work meant more to him than his wife or son.

"Yeah, he's ... changed, when they got remarried he made an effort to change," Nate said noticing the look on Serena's face. "Urm ... You can change the channel if you want."

"Thanks," Serena said, sport was not her thing, it never would be, she flipped to an old comedy show and left it there, she could deal with comedy as background noise.

Nate finished in the kitchen and handed her a mug, sitting down on another couch and watching the screen as they settled into a comfortable silence. As the show ended, Nate felt his eyelids start to droop, he was about to ask Serena if she'd like to stay over since it was so late but when he looked at her she was already fast asleep.

Nate smiled to himself as he watched her, her face was free of worry and pain and stress, she looked peaceful, like the girl he loved back when he was a teen. Nate got a blanket and covered her with it, touching her face and wondering what it would have been like if she had stayed, and for the first time since she returned he let himself really dream about the three of them being a family and what that really might mean.

* * *

**A/N : This chapter man, this chapter**

**I have written and rewritten this chapter so many times that I completely lost what I wanted out of it  
****I was so close to taking out Nate's family and just writing the after effects, but I really really wanted to include them, they're different from the little we got to see on the show, which was almost nothing**

**Thank you guys so much for the incredible reviews, every time I got a review that said update I felt so bad that I didn't have anything to give you guys but I did see your reviews and I was working on it, I promise I didn't forget**

**Guys I have a few exams left for this semester so the wait for the next chapter shouldn't be too long, but until maybe the 20th I won't be writing at all, please understand**

**Bassward - Thank you so much for your long reviews on every single one of my chapters, now that you're caught up I'm going to miss the reviews for my older chapters haha **

**Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, thank you for staying with me even after the long wait, you guys are amazing, please leave a review and let me know what you think**

**Until next time (^^,)**


	17. Chapter 17

Serena wrinkled her nose when something touched it and squeezed her eyes shut tighter, she was exhausted, she didn't want to open her eyes.

A feather or something like that brushed against her nose and she shook her head and covered her face with her arm. Her body was heavy with sleep and she could feel an uncomfortable stabbing pain on her left shoulder because she slept in such an uncomfortable position.

Serena frowned as she opened her eyes, expecting the decor at her room at her mothers apartment, she jolted up with a start to look at the lounge and open plan kitchen of an unfamiliar apartment. She heard giggling from her side and found Summer grinning at her, holding her hair up like she was getting ready to use it again.

"What are you doing here?" Summer asked leaning against her mother's stomach and raising an eyebrow.

"Where is here?" Serena asked looking around as her sleepy mind tried to remember where she ended up after her flight. "Nate."

"Well you're in his apartment," Summer said looking suspiciously at her mother. "What are you doing here?"

"I um ... I came here to see you when I landed in New York last night," Serena said, pulling up the blanket and holding her arms out for Summer to cuddle with her. "I must've fallen asleep, where's Nate?"

"I don't know, his room was empty when I woke up," Summer said settling into her mothers arms. "He left his phone in his room, _Lola_ texted him."

"What'd you do?" Serena asked, because there was no way her kid saw something from Lola and didn't do anything about it.

"Nothing," Summer buried her face against Serena's chest and mumbled something into her shirt, Serena poked her side and Summer lifted her head enough to be audible when she spoke. "I just deleted the text and cleared her name from dads call logs."

"You don't think he's going to find that suspicious?" Serena asked shaking her head, she'd told Summer to stay out of it too many times, she wasn't about to sound like a broken record. She was kinda hoping her daughter might cause some drama between them but she wasn't going to admit that to anyone.

"No," Summer set her mouth in a straight line and glared at Serena, frustrated at her for poking holes in the plan. She was going to do whatever she could to make life difficult for Lola to be with her dad, Lola was going to leave and her dad would realized how ridiculous she was and how much he loved her mom, and then they would get back together and they'd be a family and Lola would be so far out of the picture that they wouldn't even remember her name.

"Ok, no Lola talk, tell me all about yesterday and your grandparents and Grandfather," Serena said trying to get Summer back her pre-Lola mood. "I spoke to your dad a little last night and he said you guys had fun, what did you do?"

"It was so cool..." Summer began as she recounted every detail about the day before. The anger that started to build up earlier completely disappeared.

"How far away from Anne do you think I need to stay when they come visit you?" Serena asked with a grin.

"Not that far actually," Summer said and Serena raised an eyebrow. "They're not really happy with you but from what I heard, they kinda dislike Lola more."

"How did you hear this?" Serena asked, quite sure that Anne would never discuss her dislike of anyone, even a caiter-waiter, in front of a child.

"I might have eavesdropped," Summer said giving her mother an 'I'm not sorry' face. "What? I was curious about what they were saying when they thought I wasn't listening and what they really thought of me," Summer said at Serena's disappointed face. "Grams always said that people spoke about what they really felt when they thought no-one was listening."

"12 years of trying to teach you the right and wrong way, all for nothing," Serena said throwing up her hands and Summer bit her lip to hold back a laugh. "If Grams were here, she'd be in huge trouble."

"Mom," Summer said thoughtfully after a moment, and Serena's heart leapt to her throat at the seriousness on her daughters face. "I want to stay in New York, you asked me before and I made my decision, I want to stay here."

"If we go back home, your dad and his family can always come visit us in LA," Serena told her, it was a big decision, they would be moving half way across the country and Serena would have to fly over every other week or so because that's where her business was based.

"I know all that," Summer said shrugging looking down at the blanket. "I just don't want to see them once a year like we did with grandma Lily, especially now that I know dad."

"Your father would never let that happen," Serena told her and Summer nodded, still looking down and tracing the patterns with her finger. "What about your friends?"

"I'm gonna tell them later, I'm going to miss Lauren and Hannah the most but we can keep in touch," Summer said and Serena smiled sadly as she touched her grown up baby girls hair, she was maturing faster than Serena was ready for her to. "Besides, I want to see dad every day and Grandma Lily and Rufus and his kids are kinda fun to be around now and Uncle Erik is close by and I want to know dad's family more and I'll make new friends eventually."

"Are you kidding? You'll make friends on the first day of school, they'll love you," Serena said tugging on the end of Summers hair. "If you're sure, I'll make the arrangements."

"I'm sure," Summer said smiling shyly as she finally looked up to meet her mothers eyes and Serena pulled her in for a hug.

"Looks like we're moving to New York," she said, blowing out a nervous breath as soon as her daughter was looking away from her, there was so much to plan and think about and do, and even though Summer wanted to live here and she, herself missed New York, she couldn't help but feel like she wasn't ready.

"Woah what's happening here?" a voice came from behind them and Serena jumped but Summer giggled and jumped up from her place to greet her father.

"Hi dad, what did you get for me?" she asked digging into the bag of goodies he handed to her. Blair was right next to them with Henry on her hip trying to see what Summer was so excited about. Blair shot her a confused look and raised an eyebrow and Serena shook her head.

"I bumped into Blair while I was getting coffee," Nate said taking one of the cups and handing it to Serena who inhaled gratefully. "And she insisted on invading my private space."

"I did no such thing, did I Henry?" Blair said smirking and Nate rolled his eyes when Henry agreed with his mother. "What was happening just now, it looked like we walked in on a pretty emotional moment."

"we oving ack ew owk," Summer said trying to talk with her mouthful.

"Chew, swallow, now talk," Serena said, cringing at her daughters lack of manners.

"We're moving to New York," she said brightly after she had swallowed the pastry she was eating.

"Really?" Nate asked, half way between being really excited and trying to figure out if they were messing with him.

"Really, I spoke to the school when I thought she might want to move back and ... oof," Serena had her breath knocked out of her when Nate hugged her quickly before moving on to spin Summer.

Blair watched in amusement at the scene in front of her, it was like she walked into a blond family moment. "Since I assume she's going to be going to Constance, she's going to need accessories to go with that uniform and I'll have to teach her the proper ways to use those accessories, you can't be a slob like your mother, or even your father come to think of it."

"Hey," both Serena and Nate protested, but Blair just shrugged.

"I'm taking you shopping so you need to change, go on," Blair said and Summer giggled but obeyed and ran to the room she was staying in to change, waving Serena off when she told her to brush her hair. "You guys can sort out her uniform, but I have 12 years of gifts to catch up on as Godmother."

"What makes you think you'd be her Godmother?" Nate asked and Blair shot him a look that said 'Please, who else would it be'.

"Momma I don't wanna shop," Henry said leaning down so he can be put down. "I wanna stay with Uncle Nate."

"I know baby but he and Aunty Serena need to talk," Blair said and Serena and Nate avoided each others eyes. "You can show Summer all your favourite places to hide in the shops and we can go to the park after, you like Summer?"

"Yeah I do," Henry said, still not convinced about leaving his fun Uncle for a morning of shopping with his mother but he also really liked Summer and she was a kid like him so maybe she'd be more fun.

"I'm ready lets go," Summer said flying out of her room like a tornado and screaming a quick, "Bye parents, love you," as she and Henry raced down the hall to the elevator. Blair frowned and called out to them as she tried to run in her heels.

"She's going to regret that," Serena said watching them slip into the elevator. Nate nodded as he closed the door and came to sit down on the couch next to hers. "Thank you for letting me stay last night, and for the blanket."

"Well I couldn't wake you up and tell you to leave," Nate said as Serena folded the blanket and nodded. "I was going to ask you to stay anyway but you were snoring by the time I looked over at you."

"I was not snoring," Serena said horrified and Nate burst out laughing. "You are not funny, Nate Archibald."

"You guys are really staying in New York," he asked after a moment and Serena nodded.

"I spoke to Summer some time ago, told her to think about it, and this morning she decided that she wanted to stay here," Serena said picking at the end of the blanket. "I think maybe she feels that if she strays too far away from you, she's going to lose you and I don't think she can handle even the thought of that."

"You didn't want to move back?" Nate asked, getting the feeling that she didn't.

"I don't know," Serena whispered and Nate's face turned hard, Serena held up her hand and tried to explain herself before he got angry with her, or started hating her again. "It's alot to think about and do, I just need some time to decide what to do about the business and everything else."

"Ah yes, you've taken over the business," Nate said, remembering that she told him that in one of the first conversations they had.

"Luckily I don't need to be there every day but I will need to be there often enough," Serena said sighing. "I'll speak to Chuck later, he'll help me with my business woes."

"If you ever need a lawyer..." Nate threw out there and Serena smiled gratefully and nodded.

That sat for a minute in silence and Serena was beginning to feel like she had overstayed her welcome, she cleared her throat and made to stand up but Nate's voice stopped her.

"It still doesn't feel real," he said and Serena tuned to look at him, he was looking at the wall ahead of him blankly and she sat back down and watched him think. "Having her as my daughter I mean, it feels like this is all a dream and I'm going to wake up in the morning and you won't be here anymore and she'd be gone and my life would be empty again."

Serena swallowed nervously as she watched Nate struggle to find the words that would properly explain what he was feeling to her.

"Don't get me wrong, I loved my life before, being with Lola, spending time with Chuck and Blair and being Henry's Godfather, watching him grow," Nate said wistfully, smiling in a way that let her know how much seeing Henry grow up and having a hand in that meant to him, how much he wished he could have done the same for Summer. "But since that morning that I woke up and they told me you were gone, something was missing, it's like you took a part of me with you, I just didn't know how literal that part was until this year."

Serena bit her lip and smiled slightly, she knew how he felt, even though she left and she had their baby with her, she left her heart in New York with him and that was a part of her that she could never get over missing.

"When we met at central part it was like my world snapped back into focus, New York felt like home again," he said and Serena felt her heart twist because that's exactly what she felt when she saw him that day. "And then you introduced me to your daughter and it almost fell apart again until I realized her surname was van der Woodsen, I still can't believe I didn't put it all together the moment I saw her, I mean the timing and her age and you can tell by looking at her who's daughter she is."

"I think the shock of meeting my 12 year old daughter stopped you from really thinking about it," Serena told him and Nate huffed out a laugh and shook his head a little before looking at her.

"I don't even know why I'm telling you this," he said softly looking into her eyes and Serena felt her breath catch in her throat. "I've been telling everyone I could never forgive you but I think I was just trying to make myself believe that, I can't hate you Serena, no matter what you've done I can never hate you."

Serena pressed her trembling lips together and closed her eyes, only then did she realize she was crying. Nate looked close to tears as well but he was controlling his emotions much better than she was.

"Can you tell me about her?" he finally asked. "About what she was like when she was she was a baby, things that only you would know, things I should know."

Serena wiped her cheeks and nodded heartily. "Where do I begin?"

* * *

**A/N : So again I apologize for the long wait, I am really bad at updating with this story, real life is hard guys**

**I do hope you enjoyed this chapter and everything that happened in it, this story is just such fun to write and I really don't want it to end but I feel like its coming to a close, I'm enjoying dragging it out and I hope you guys enjoy reading it at this slow pace**

**I felt that it was time for Serena and Nate to talk about Summers past, originally I wanted to write out that conversation but after a month of trying, I think I'm going to post this and move on with this story without that chapter, but I do want to add a scene or memory of Summer as a baby or her pre-Nate years, so look out for that**

**Please review and let me know what you think, I love reading your reviews and thoughts**

**Until next time (^^,)**


	18. Chapter 18

Chuck raised his eyebrow as he sat down, today had been an interesting day and looking over at Nate he felt like it was going to get that much more interesting.

"Nathaniel, what brings you to my office in the middle of the day," Chuck asked with a smirk as he looked over at his distracted friend. "And looking like that?"

"Like what?" Nate asked defensively and Chuck tilted his head. "It's been a weird day."

"Blair mentioned something about weird," Chuck said.

"Is that all you and Blair do?" Nate asked irritably and Chuck narrowed his eyes at Nate. "Gossip about me?"

"It's not always about you," Chuck said with a smirk at Nate's frustrated face. "Sometimes we change it up and gossip about our parents."

"Why do I even bother with you?" Nate growled and Chuck laughed.

"What happened?" Chuck asked because it was obvious his friend was troubled about something.

Nate stood up and ran his hand through his hair, turning and looking at Chuck with an exhausted expression on his face. "I just spent the past few hours listening to Serena tell me stories about our daughter and convincing myself that I don't still love her like I did when we were stupid teenagers."

"Why do you have to convince yourself of these things Nathaniel?" Chuck asked. "If you're putting that much effort into convincing yourself that it isn't true, then it probably is."

"Do you listen to the nonsense that comes out of your mouth?"

"Do you? Nathaniel, if you have been paying half as much attention to the 'nonsense' that comes out of your mouth as I have, you would realize that you are just making life difficult for yourself," Chuck said leaning back in his chair. "Break up with Lola, stop trying to convince yourself that you shouldn't feel anything for Serena and make that daughter of yours happy."

"You make it sound so easy," Nate said chuckling and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"You are complicating this for yourself," Chuck said waiting for his friend to slump back into the chair in front of him. "It's time to do what you want."

"And what is it that I want Charles," Nate asked sounding so defeated in that moment that Chuck wanted to hug his friend. "Please tell me because I am losing my mind."

"What you want hasn't changed that much from when we were 'stupid teenagers'," Chuck said. "You still want Serena, you've always wanted only her, why do you think it was easy for me to lure Blair away from you," Chuck smirked and Nate laughed and shook his head. "You wanted the whole happily ever after thing with her, kids, marriage, townhouse."

"I gave up on that dream when she walked away," Nate said bitterly.

"And now she's back, with the kid, now all that's left is for you to stop complaining to me and marry her, and then come to me when you want to buy the townhouse," Chuck said and Nate narrowed his eyes. "Get rid of Lola, everyone will be happier."

"I still don't get why you don't like her," Nate said and Chuck shrugged.

"Maybe it's because we always knew who it was that you should really be with, or maybe it was because she's such a bitch, and you won't see it coz you're sleeping with her," Chuck said matter-of-factly and Nate rolled his eyes. "Trust me Nathaniel, I know these things."

Nate got up off the chair again and paced the room turning to say something to Chuck but thinking better of it at the last minute.

"You're making me dizzy," Chuck said after a full 3 minutes of Nate's pacing.

"Do you know that Lily convinced her to give Summer away to this couple she met on one of her exotic trips, and Serena would have but they made the mistake of letting her hold the baby," Nate said rubbing his face. "I don't think Serena has forgiven her mother for that, I think if Lily knew she was pregnant before it was too late, she would have convinced her to get an ... to get rid of Summer."

Chuck waited a moment, letting Nate get it all out of his system. "It's in the past now Nathaniel, hopefully them being here will repair that relationship and we can all be one big happy family."

"And when she was little Summer used to ask about me and I wasn't there because Serena didn't allow me to be and then after a few years she just decided that her father was some dead beat, living on the streets somewhere and Serena didn't even bother to correct her."

"Nathaniel..."

"Do I just ..." Nate started looking up to look at his best friend and Chuck smiled and got up, walking around the table to put his arm around Nate's shoulders. "How do I let that go?"

"That is up to you," Chuck said after a few moments. "I know it seems too soon for you to have 'gotten over it' but you've both been suffering for the better part of the last 13 years, sometimes you just got to let go of that anger you think you should have and be happy."

"Do you think Serena even wants that?" Nate asked and Chuck raised an eyebrow. "It's been so long, she's changed so much and so have I, do you think she even wants a life with me, I mean of course I'll be there because of I'm the father of her child but maybe that's all I'll ever be."

"What makes you think that Nathaniel?" Chuck asked because it was kinda obvious for everyone to see that Serena was in love with Nate.

"She came back here and she told me that she loved me back when we were kids and how she's back in New York for Summer and I to build our relationship," Nate said furrowing his brows. "She never once said that _she _came back for me."

"You're dating someone else, do you really think she would just come out and say that she came back for you?"

"The old Serena would have," Nate finally said. "As long as I wasn't with Blair, she would have."

"Like you said, you've both changed," Chuck said and Nate sighed. "Maybe you need to push her a little bit more to reveal her feelings, or maybe you just need to show her that it will be ok before she does."

* * *

Serena gasped and bit down on her lip to stop herself from laughing as Lola fell into the pond at Central Park where they had all gathered to have a picnic.

Her mother and Rufus, Rufus' kids, Blair, Chuck and Henry, herself, Summer and Nate ... and Lola, it was supposed to be a relaxing day for the family to get to know each other again, everyone was getting along well, even Summer and Lola, although that might be because they avoided each other at all costs.

Dan and Rufus got up from their seats and ran to help Nate pull her out and Serena's eyes widened when she saw the remote control car speeding away from the scene. She realised that she was the only one that noticed the car and looked around to find Summer knowing that her kid either had a hand in this or she was laughing uncontrollably somewhere... or both.

It had been a week since Summer's trip to the Van der Bilts and her talk with Nate and since then every time Summer and Lola were in the same room something had to happen. It wasn't anything too drastic but Lola had baking powder 'mistakenly' thrown in her face, bubblegum 'dropped' in her hair and Summer might have pulled the strings on Lola's bathing suit when they went to the beach the day before which did not end well for her or her bathing suit. Serena doesn't even want to think about what else Summer had done that she hadn't told her mother or Serena wasn't there to witness.

Summer had volunteered to take Henry to the play area they had close by and Blair agreed since she could see them perfectly from where they were seated, but Summer wasn't there when Serena looked, even though Henry was on the swings. Serena panicked a little before the caught sight of a familiar head of blond hair jumping out from a tree and grinning as she handed the remote control to the little boy sitting next to Henry on the swings.

"Oh no," Serena said to herself holding her cheeks and looking back to where Lola was no out of the water and had Nate's coat around her.

"You know, if she was with us for longer than 3 months I could have really taught her how to use that devious mind of hers," Blair whispered to Serena with a smirk and Serena shook her head and covered her eyes. "She's everything I wanted in a Goddaughter."

"You're not helping," Serena mumbled and Blair rubbed Serena's back in what was supposed to be a comforting manner but it just stressed Serena out a little more.

"Where is she?" Lola raged storming up to where they were seated.

"Who?" Jenny asked confused.

"Summer," Lola said gritting her teeth and Serena looked at her with an eyebrow raised.

"She's at the playground with Henry," Serena said calmly even though she was just waiting for Lola to say something so she could slap her. "Why do you ask?"

"She did this, I know she did," Lola said looking up to the playground where Summer was pushing Henry on the swing and glancing down to where the adults where every few seconds.

"What exactly are you accusing my daughter of?" Serena asked, standing up to her full height and narrowing her eyes down at Lola.

"Summer didn't do anything, she's right up there with Henry," Nate said gesturing to the kids play area and looking like he was done with having this conversation.

"She hates me, she could have paid someone to trip me," she said and Nate sighed and rubbed his temple, Serena tilted her head to the side and thought about how ridiculous that sounded even if she knew what Summer had done. "This isn't the first time, I had to cut my hair because of the bubblegum incident and I did not appreciate the toothpaste underneath my arms when I woke up the other morning."

Serena fully expected to lash out at Lola and protecting her daughters actions but she couldn't help but just burst out laughing, it wasn't only her, Jenny and Vanessa were covering their mouths and biting down on their lips to keep themselves from laughing and Serena saw Blair's mouth twitch.

Lola glared at them and threw her hands up, stomping away as the rest of the group cracked up.

"Nathaniel," Chuck said quietly nudging Nate who was the only one who hadn't seemed to really grasp the hilarity of the situation. Nate nodded at Chuck and ran after Lola.

While the rest of the group laughed about what was happening, Serena was watching Nate talk to Lola. She could see him losing his patience with her and she wondered how much longer that relationship was going to last, Summer was not giving up on her quest to break up her father and his girlfriend, no matter how many half-hearted times Serena told her to stop. As Lola walked away from Nate he looked up and caught her eye, Serena gave him a sympathetic smile and Nate shrugged and smiled back at her, turning and walking away from them.

"You've been staring at dad's back for a really long time," Summer whispered and Serena jerked out of the little trance she was in, turning to find her daughter right next to her.

"I know what you did," Serena whispered back. "Lola knows too."

"I know nothing about nothing," Summer said holding her hands up and giggling. "Where's dad going?"

"Probably to try and make things right with Lola," Serena said and Summer frowned. "Come on devil, you've done enough damage today, you can plan your next attack on Lola tomorrow."

"I guess having her around isn't so bad if I get to mess with her," Summer said grinning.

"Remind me to phone Erik later and tell him to get his butt back here, I can't control you anymore," Serena said exasperatedly throwing up her arms and Summer giggled because she knew her mother was joking.

"Hey mom," Summer said seriously, tugging at her mother's arm to get her attention. "I really think that if you tell dad that you want to be with him, Lola wouldn't matter, and I'm not just saying that because I want us to be this big happy family."

Serena squeezed her wise daughter to her side before the girl got up to chase Henry back to the playground. When she looked up from them she found Chuck watching her and she knew that he heard everything that she and Summer spoke about. He nodded once and smiled, looking back to her mother and Blair before Serena could react.

* * *

**A/N : I love Summer :D shes so fun to write**

**So what do you guys think about this chapter? **

**I am so amazed by the response that this story has been getting and your reviews, you guys make me so happy, so thank you for all those wonderful reviews.**

**I can tell that almost all of you are tired of Lola and I kinda am as well so I put in a little Summer torturing her fun lol **

**BTW does anyone watch Pretty Little Liars? They had the big A reveal and there is so much hate where I thought that it was actually a good back story and ending to this saga, like there are things I'd change but maybe its because I watched Gossip Girl and the horrible Dan reveal that I felt like this was brilliant compared to it, I don't know **

**Anyway please please please review and let me know what you think!**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	19. Chapter 19

Serena smiled to herself as she watched the sun setting from the balcony at her mother's apartment, she missed the way the afternoon rays bounced off the windows and made the busy city seem so calm. Of course she just had to look down at the streets to know that nothing would ever be calm in New York, not really, but for a few moments she let the lazy feeling wash over her.

Things with her mother where so much better than she had expected, there were a lot of tense moments, a lot of things Lily kept pushing under the rug but there were also a few breakthrough conversations and maybe just a little bit of healing, which Serena never realized she needed until it happened. The best thing was that Summer finally had a relationship with her grandmother, Lily looked at Summer the way she looked at Henry, and Summer lit up every single time she realized that Lily wasn't just being grandmotherly for show like she believed before.

Summer was starting school in a few days and that made Serena more nervous than she thought she would ever be. Blair had not only given Summer a crash course in school fashion but she also gave her a run-down of everything she needed to know about Constance Billard, telling her all about the hierarchies in the school. Being a former Queen, Blair knew who Summer needed to befriend to stay on top of things, Serena shook her head and rolled her eyes at Summer to tell her not to take things so seriously but Blair was adamant that her Godchild would take her former place on top on the social ladder.

Serena ran the tip of her finger over the rim of her coffee mug and rolled her head, trying to get all the knots out of her neck and shoulders. Ever since Summer decided she wanted to stay in New York, Serena had to get her life into order. The first thing she did was talk to Chuck about running her business from across the country and she had to admit, her step-brother was a little bit of a genius when it came to business, she always knew he'd take over from Bart, she just didn't know how good he'd be at it.

Once she sorted out all her business problems, she decided that she needed to find a place to stay for her and Summer. Her mother and Rufus had both told her that their place was big enough and there was no rush for them to leave but it was a temporary situation and they had already overstayed the time she had meant to stay there. Since Erik was back in town for another week before heading back to college, he and Blair had basically taken over the house hunting for her, and now that everything was sorted out she was a little bored.

Back in LA, Summer was constantly keeping her on her toes but since they got to New York, she had been keeping Nate, Blair and Lily occupied to the point where Serena kinda felt bad for them having to deal with her hyperactive child, although this was one of those afternoons when she was done with work and there really wasn't much else to do where she missed coming home and having Summer disturb her peace.

"Hey."

Serena was so deep in thought that she almost jumped out of her skin when he spoke, holding her palms to her chest. She realized too late that in doing so she let go of the cup she was holding and it was now falling toward the streets of the Upper East Side.

Nate laughed as he walked over to look over the balcony. "I would not like to be the person that hit," he said and Serena let out a strangled laugh and covered her burning face. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"I thought I was alone," Serena said letting out a deep breath and turning to face him, only realizing how close he was to her then. "Where's Summ?"

"We met up with your mom downstairs, she said there were a few errands for an event she's planning so Summer wanted to go with her and see what goes into it," Nate said with a shrug. "You don't mind?"

"No of course not," Serena said shaking her head and smiling at him. "But why are you here and not doing what you usually do after you drop Summer off?"

"Can't a guy spend some time with his baby mama?" Nate asked and Serena burst out laughing.

"Don't ever say that again," she said and Nate smiled and watched her as she recovered.

"I ... you know it sounded better in my head," he said chuckling and turning to watch the city like she had been doing before. "But I did, want to spend some time with you, that is, of that's ok with you?"

"Oh," Serena said surprised. She leaned her forearms on the balcony rail next to him and mimicking him. "Well this afternoon it seems I have too much time, so you being here is more than ok."

Nate grinned and Serena smiled, watching him watch the city and trying to figure him out.

"What?" he asked after letting her stare in silence for a few moments. He tilted his head slightly and looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

"Nothing, I was just thinking about how much everything has changed, how much you guys have changed," Serena said taking a deep breath, her eyes still on him. "It's a little overwhelming at times."

"I know," he said chuckling. "Every time I look at you I can remember this wild child, who said and did whatever the hell she pleased, and the only people whose opinions or feelings mattered were Erik and Blair."

"And you," Serena said, it was true, back then she was so angry at the world, she just refused to have anyone tell her what she could or couldn't do, but Erik, Blair and Nate were her weaknesses, no matter what state she was in, they meant everything to her.

Nate felt his breath catch in his throat when she spoke, "Of course Georgina's opinion had to have mattered as well," he said clearing his throat and looking at her with a raised eyebrow.

"Georgina was an enabler, I didn't care what she thought, as long as she could get me to where I needed to go," Serena told him and Nate nodded. "What happened to her anyway?"

"After you left, she got a little bored, caused some trouble with Blair," Nate said and Serena winced, knowing how much Blair hated the thought of Georgina. "So Blair went to her parents."

"She did what?" Serena asked, she never met Mr and Mrs Sparks but she knew that Georgina's parents were a special kind of scary if Georgina was afraid of them.

"Yeah," Nate said chuckling. "They put the fear of God in her, _literally_, the last we saw, Georgina was this leader in a religious camp and she was devoted to being a force of good, it was a little scary to be honest."

"Wow," Serena said, her mouth hanging open and her eyes wide, when she left Georgina she was on every drug she knew she could find in Manhattan, she had been sleeping around with married men and she didn't even know what a church was. "Wow."

"We felt the same way," Nate said laughing at her reaction. "Blair kept poking her to see if she was actually there and not a hallucination."

"Wow," Serena said again. "Ok, if I keep thinking about this, I'm just going to keep saying wow."

"Chuck said that you're house hunting," Nate said steering the conversation as far away from Georgina as he could and Serena laughed at his lack of subtlety. "How's that going?"

"Well B and Erik are house hunting, I'm just waiting for them to find something," she said and Nate raised an eyebrow. "I looked at a couple places but Erik absolutely hated them, and since it'll probably be his home till he decides to move away from me, I let him take over."

"Less stress for you," Nate said knowingly and Serena laughed.

"You still know me too well," Serena told him and Nate grinned.

"We haven't changed as much as you want to believe," Nate said. "And also I recently relearned everything about you thanks you our daughter," he said and Serena's heart skipped a beat. "She's so much like you, the things she says and the way she acts sometimes, it's crazy."

"Sometimes a little too much," Serena laughed and covered her face. Nate reached out and pulled her hands away from her face and Serena blushed and looked at him confused. "Soon she'll be imitating you," Serena said clearing her throat.

"I wouldn't mind that," Nate said, letting go of her hands and looked away from her again as she continued to watch him. He was acting strange and she was trying not to look too much into it but the last time they spoke like this was before he found out about Summer and even then he was a little more guarded.

Maybe it was because he was acting like he did when they were 15 or maybe it was because everything her daughter and Blair were telling her about her feelings for Nate and even Chuck's nod were making her over think everything or maybe it was just because she wanted to, that she closed the space between them and kissed him when he turned to face her again. She could feel him stiffen in shock and then almost immediately relax into the kiss and pull her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have done that," she said when they broke apart, she tried to step out of his arms but Nate held her there and Serena took a measured breath to control her breathing as she looked into his blue eyes. "Lola..."

"That is the last thing you should be apologizing for," Nate said smirking at her expression but refusing to release her, he wanted to keep her in his arms as long as he possibly could. "Lola and I broke up."

"When?" Serena asked shocked because it hadn't been that long since she saw him run after her at the park. "And does Summer know?"

"I think Summer would be screaming from the rooftops if she knew," Nate said with a chuckle and Serena smiled and closed her eyes. "I ended it after that incident at Central Park when she asked me to choose between you and Summer, or her."

"Nate I'm sorry," Serena began to say and Nate shook his head quickly, it wasn't a choice.

"She's not you," he said and Serena's heart felt like it was going to beat out of her chest. "She'll never be you."

She barely processed his words when his lips were on hers again and her arms were around his neck.

"Mom! You'll never guess what happened," Summer bellowed from somewhere in the house and Nate and Serena sprang apart, looking at each other guiltily and arranging their expressions to be as neutral as possible before their 12 year old bounded onto the balcony. "We were walking to the caterers office and this mug just came out of nowhere, the lady in front of us screamed so loud ... Woah I'm getting some weird deja vu feelings here," she said as she noticed that both her parents were there not just her mom.

"What are you talking about honey?" Serena asked, swallowing and crossing her arms tightly across her body.

"Last time I walked out onto this balcony with you and dad alone, I found out dad was my dad," she said as if it were obvious and then squinted her eyes at her father. "Why are you still here? Grandma Lily and I were gone for like an hour."

"Enough with the 20 questions, we were just having a heart to heart," Serena said walking toward her daughter and turning her back toward the house and moving her so she'd walk in. She looked over her shoulder to see Nate smiling at her and she rolled her eyes and cocked her head to the door to tell him to follow.

"Another one?" Summer asked sounding disappointed. "I thought you guys were over your problems by now."

"Honey, it's like 13 years of problems we have to work through," Serena said, not ready to tell the girl exactly what happened before she walked in. Nate grunted next to her but Serena shot him a look and he held up his hands in surrender.

"Hey Nate," Erik said getting up to shake his hand and then hug his sister.

"Erik, when did you get back?" Nate asked, he hadn't seen the younger boy around for a while.

"Yesterday," he told Nate flopping down onto a couch and taking his niece with him. "And then I'm back at collage next week."

"Final year?" Nate asked and Erik nodded. "Good luck."

"Thanks man," Erik said letting Summer go so she could stand up.

"I should be going, I'll see you soon Summ," he said holding his arms out so that he could give Summer a hug and then looked to Serena.

"I'll walk you out," she said and Summer knitted her eyebrows together as she watched her parents suspiciously until Erik pulled her hair and she turned around to hit him, but he was already running in the opposite direction.

"Are they always like that?" Nate asked chuckling as he got into the elevator and Serena followed.

"They're like siblings that only get along on special occasions," Serena grumbled rolling her eyes.

Serena was going to say more but Nate pulled her in and kissed her again, only releasing her when the elevator pinged and the doors opened.

"Are you going to tell Summer?" he asked grabbing her hand and walking through the lobby.

"I'll tell her when I know what this is," she said tugging on his hand to stop him. "Not that I'm complaining, but just last week you were in a serious relationship and we were barely talking, now we're making out in secret?"

"Serena, you're it for me," Nate said seriously, cupping her cheek. "Things with Lola and I ended the moment you stepped out of that plane, I want to be with you, forever, but first I want to take you out on a real date, like I should have when we were kids, I want to do this right."

Serena looked up at him and Nate started to get nervous when she didn't respond immediately, but then she broke out into a smile and he mirrored her actions. "I think I'd like that."

"You think?"

"Just get out of here before I change my mind," Serena said shaking her head and Nate laughed leaning in to kiss her one last time before walking out and flagging down a cab.

Serena bit her lip and squealed internally as she watched him go, composing herself as much as she could before going back up to her mother's apartment.

* * *

**A/N : Writing this chapter made me feel so mushy and happy and oh my NS heart, I wish we had them as endgame on the show**

**I always feel like I do things too quickly when I write, like have people forgive each other or get together so I need to guys to let me know if I'm off base of if this feels right**

**All I know is that, we're already 19 chapters in, I think it was about time haha **

**So, what do you guys think, I really hope you like this chapter, please leave a review and let me know, I love hearing your thoughts**

**Oh and guys I'm on time with my update! Aren't you proud? :D**

**Until Next time (^^,)**


	20. Chapter 20

"Hey, you came," Nate said getting up to kiss her cheek and pull out her chair.

"You didn't think I would?" Serena asked biting her lip and smiling as he took a seat in front of her. Tonight was their first date and Serena could think of nothing else the whole day, which made her meetings useless and frustrating for all those trying to get answers from her.

"I wasn't sure how you would get it past Summer," Nate said and Serena shrugged, their daughter still had no idea what was happening with her parents.

"As far as she knows I'm still on a plane back from LA," Serena told him, giggling as the waiter stopped at the table to pour her a glass of wine. "She knows I'll wake her up when I get in to say goodnight if I'm too late."

A strange expression crossed Nate's features but before Serena could comment on it he smiled at her and raised his glass. "To us," he said and Serena laughed and clinked her glass with his. "May we never lose each other again."

"I'll drink to that," Serena said taking a sip of her wine.

They made small talk through their meal, joking around about their childhood and their daughter and how excited Summer got when Nate told her that he and Lola had broken up. "You don't look as comfortable as I would have liked," Nate said after their plates were taken away, Serena raised an eyebrow and poked the very comfortable cushioned seat she was on and Nate laughed. "That's not what I meant and you know it."

"I know, I just ... I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop," Serena said looking up at him through her eyelashes.

"What other shoe?"

"Everything is just working out perfectly and that its scaring me," Serena said taking a shaky breath, things never went her way, at least never this flawlessly. "You and Summer have a relationship like I always dreamed you would and you broke up with Lola and now we're here, on a date, it's just too perfect."

"S, that's a good thing, I'm not going to let anything come in between us again," he said taking her hand in his and squeezing it gently. "Is that too much for a first date?"

"For a normal first date maybe," Serena said laughing. "But not with us and our complicated history."

"Chuck told me that we've been suffering for the past 13 years and that we should just let go of that anger and be happy," Nate told her.

"When did he get so smart?" Serena asked and Nate chuckled.

"So I was thinking," Nate started.

"That's never good," Serena joked and Nate shot her a deadly look.

"You are not funny Miss Van der Woodsen," Nate growled and Serena giggled and took a sip of her wine. "I think we should take Summer somewhere nice and tell her what's been going on."

"This is only the first date what if I don't like you enough for this whole forever thing," Serena said and Nate narrowed his eyes at her.

"You are full of jokes tonight," he said rolling his eyes and Serena grinned at him.

"I'm sorry, it was too tempting not to," Serena said. "You really are serious about this, us."

"That's what I keep telling you," Nate said and Serena smiled shyly.

"If this is a dream I really don't want to wake up," she said in a whisper and Nate leaned across the table to kiss her gently.

Serena giggled as they broke apart, sighing dreamily as she rested her face in her hands. It was a couple of days since they kissed on the balcony and every time Serena thought about kissing him she got really smiley and her daughter was getting very suspicious of her. It baffled and excited her that kissing Nate made her feel like she was a teenager again, every time something happened with them she expected to feel different, or have the feelings from 13 years ago fade away, she never expected them to be stronger.

"I know you want to tell Summer but I think we should let her suffer for a little longer," Serena told him. "She's so confused as it is, she thought as soon as you and Lola broke up we'd get together."

"You'd be that mean to our girl?" Nate asked with a chuckle.

"_Our _girl and I have an understanding, you'll get there once you stop feeling like you should give in to her every whim," Serena said cocking an eyebrow up at him because she knew that there was no way he would deny the child anything, just the other day she was parading around with his credit card, buying half the store before Serena realized what was happening.

"I can't help it, I can't say no to that face," Nate said and Serena laughed. "Don't laugh, you used to make the same face when we were kids."

"I only did that for important things Natie," Serena said blinking innocently at him and Nate rolled his eyes.

"Do you want to get out of here?" he asked, he could see the tiredness in her face, he knew that she had an early flight and it was so late already that he didn't want her to fall asleep at the table.

"What about dessert?"

"Another time," he said and Serena nodded, draining her glass as he flagged down their waiter to bring them the bill. Nate held out his hand and laced their fingers together as they started to walk down the streets of the Upper East Side.

"I think I might have had too much wine," she said with a content smile on her face as she leaned her head on his shoulder.

"Maybe just enough," Nate said, knowing that her guard was completely down right now and he was left to enjoy it. "Tell me more about LA."

"What do you wanna know?" Serena asked and Nate shrugged.

"Tell me about your friends and your dates and if I'm living up to them," he said and Serena turned to press her face against his shoulder for a moment. "Tell me if you miss it."

"Sometimes, we were mostly in the country, so being thrown back into the fast life of New York is a little jarring, I'm surprised Summer is handling it so well, I miss Grams' house the most," Serena said twisting her mouth to the side in thought. "I had a few friends, no-one like Blair though, it was hard to go out and stuff with a baby, I think it was only when Summer started pre-school that I made friends with some of the younger moms but even then they were so much older than I was, so it was weird."

"Judge-y weird?" Nate asked, from the tone of her voice and she nodded.

"They'd never say it to my face but I knew, I used to pick her up in my school uniform sometimes," Serena said shaking her head. "I didn't care much though, with Summer I didn't need anyone else," she said smiling. "As for the dates, I think you did pretty well, topped any other first date I've been on."

"I think I like the sound of that," Nate said and Serena bit her lip.

"What about you?" Serena asked and Nate raised his eyebrows. "How's this compared to all your first dates."

"Oh you know, a little boring," Nate said and Serena's jaw dropped and she hit him hard on his arm when she realized he was joking. "Ow."

"I believed you," she shrieked and Nate laughed.

"How could anyone ever be bored with you?" he asked stopping them and turning her to face him so he could lean down and kiss her. "Best. Date. Ever."

"Charmer," Serena mumbled when they broke apart, wrapping her arms around Nate's middle and just enjoying the feel of him against her as they walked toward her mothers apartment.

"My mother has been talking about getting everyone together for a family dinner soon," Serena mentioned and Nate looked at her curiously. "Maybe you could be my date and we can tell them all then."

"What if you don't like me for the whole 'forever thing'?" Nate teased and Serena laughed out loud making Nate smile.

"Don't tell Chuck," Serena whispered as they came to a stop at the door of the building, their slow walk from the restaurant wasn't long enough.

"He probably knows already," he said and Serena nodded because that man knew everything. They kissed for a few more minutes before Nate reluctantly let her go and Serena used the ride up to her mothers apartment to compose herself. Since it was so late, everyone was already asleep so she snuck into Summer's room and made sure the girl was tucked in nicely.

"You're late," Summer mumbled and Serena giggled as she bent down next to the bed. "And you smell like alcohol."

"I had wine," she said smoothing Summer's hair back. "Go to sleep, I'll talk to you in the morning."

"Love you mommy," she said turning over and falling back into a deep sleep.

"Love you too baby," Serena whispered.

* * *

"How's school?" Serena asked Summer as they walked slowly through Central Park.

"It's been 3 days, it's as good as you'd expect it to be," Summer said frowning which made Serena frown.

"What's wrong?" she asked and Summer sighed.

"All these kids knew each other from the time they were conceived and they have their clicks and I don't fit in," she said chewing on her lip. "Aunt Blair told me exactly what to do but I don't know how, I'm not a queen bee, I'm Summer."

"I know honey," Serena said soothingly, rubbing her back. "But like you said, it's only been 3 days, it took me 3 months to make friends and find a place in my new school after I had you, you'll be just fine."

"I know I was the one who wanted to move to New York but I'm kinda missing home and Lauren and Hannah," Summer said softly. "I even miss my teachers and my school."

"I miss the country house," Serena said and Summer smiled as she remembered it. "And Grams' rose garden, I sometimes miss Mr Wilken's annoying dog," Serena said laughing, she hated their neighbours dog, their houses where so far apart and yet that dog still managed to make itself heard and if Serena had her way she would have strangled it. "We could always move back if you don't want to stay here, we still have the house and the school will take you back in a heartbeat."

"I don't want to go back, everyone's here and it's been so much fun living in New York," Summer said. "I just want to fit in."

"You will, you will make friends with the kids from your school and we will find a place to call our own and really soon, this place will start to feel like home to you," Serena told her.

"It's already home to you again, isn't it," Summer asked and Serena smiled at her thoughtful girl, remembering their conversation from when they first landed in New York all that time ago.

"It's always been my home," Serena said, she grew up in New York, she fell in love in New York, New York had loved her and she loved it.

"I get why you didn't want me to grow up here," Summer said after a few moments and Serena furrowed her eyebrows. "I was listening to the kids talk in school about the things that they do and life is so much more hectic here even for them, I didn't worry about half the things that they worry about when I was growing up."

"Your dad and I never wanted you to have the childhood that we had," Serena said and Summer smiled. "He used to say that his kid's biggest worry would be choosing their favourite TV show."

"What did dad have to worry about? I know you had to take care of Uncle Erik," Summer said and Serena shrugged.

"You met Grandfather, honey," Serena said and Summer cringed slightly, he was scary, they had spent time together after their first meeting where he seemed to like her more but he was still scary. "He's a lot easier to handle now than he was when your dad was growing up, but why don't you ask your dad now?"

Summer looked at her mom confused before following her eyes to where Nate was approaching them. Summer leapt into his arms when he got close enough and buried her head in the crook of his neck, refusing to look up.

"What happened?" he asked worriedly looking at Serena.

"Bad day," Summer mumbled into his shirt and Nate 'ahh''d, adjusting the 12 year old in his arms.

"School," he asked and Serena nodded. "We've all been there, it gets worse."

"Nate," Serena scolded and he laughed and bounced Summer who whimpered slightly.

"And then it'll get better," he said with a laugh as Serena glared at him. "Besides, you're Blair Bass' goddaughter, if anyone gives you any trouble they're dead meat."

"She's Summer's godmother?" Serena asked because they had never actually discussed it.

"Like she said, is there really anyone else that we'd choose?" Nate asked and Serena shrugged after thinking about it for a moment, there really wasn't.

"Let's go to my place," Nate finally said looking around. "We'll get ice-cream from that place your mom and I used to go to, that'll make you feel better, Summ."

"I knew there was a reason I called you," Serena said and Nate laughed, holding Summer tightly with one hand, realizing that she wasn't going to stop clinging to him like a monkey anytime soon, he let the other drop down so he could interlace his fingers with Serena's. Serena smiled and got closer to him, she almost expected Summer to sense that they were holding hands but the little girl kept her face buried in Nate's shirt only answering questions when her parents asked her things directly.

Serena squeezed Nate's hand as they walked, just to make sure that he was really there, that this family moment was actually happening. He took on the role of being Summer's father so perfectly that Serena wondered how she could ever have kept them apart.

* * *

**A/N : OMG another chapter, barely 2 weeks since the last one? What is happening?**

**Lol I can only hope that the quality of these chapters are as good as I think they are, this chapter basically wrote itself and there was so little that I changed after I read over it that I'm a little nervous but I think it fits in , I love Summer and Nate's relationship almost as much as I love Serena and Nate's relationship so I am thrilled to have both of those in this chapter**

**How are you guys liking the story so far? Its coming to a close, I feel like I could have ended the story on this chapter and been really happy with it but I want the family to see NS together and I want to write that in this story and not as a separate one-shot**

**Please please please review and let me know what you think, it has been a year since I posted the first chapter which I find crazy! So thank you guys for sticking with me for this long, and especially the reviewers, guys this is the first story I have written that has reached 200 reviews, I can't even express how happy that makes me**

**I feel like this story has 1 or 2 more chapters left but with my pacing and the way I have written this I might stretch it further lol I think I will let my muse decide that**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	21. Chapter 21

Nate rubbed at his face tiredly as he went to open the door, it had been a long, stressful few weeks, he had one perfect afternoon to break it up, where he got to hang out with Serena and Summer and just enjoy their company without any angst or anger hanging over their heads. Summer of course was a little depressed but they'd managed to cheer her up with stories of their school years and the mischief they'd get up to.

Tonight he'd get to see them again, just the thought of his girls made him smile in his worst moments. "I'm coming," he mumbled as someone knocked on the door again.

"Wow look at you," Serena said when he finally opened the door and she saw him with his suit on and his hair slicked back. "You know it's just the family that's going to be there, you didn't have to dress up."

Nate stood at the door and just stared at her as she touched his hair, Serena knitted her eyebrows together when he still didn't speak and drew her hands together against her chest as she became self conscious.

"Are you ok?" she asked confused about his reaction.

"Yeah, I just ... wow," he said, running his eyes up and down her body appreciatively. "I thought you said this was just a family thing."

"It _is_ just a family thing," she whispered as he pulled her against him and inside the apartment. "And we should leave now."

"Do we have to? I mean we could just stay here," he said kissing her neck suggestively. "Order pizza, have wine ... cuddle?"

"Nate," Serena scolded giggling and hiding her face under her hair so Nate had to push it back to see her face. "We should go, our daughter is waiting and she's very suspicious about us and tonight is the night we tell her that we're together."

"She probably going to kill us when she realizes we've been together for a while," he joked and Serena groaned and dropped her forehead to his shoulder. "I told you we should have told her after the first date."

"I know but I wanted the time to be right before we told her," Serena said moving to lean against the counter when Nate let her go.

"And now's the time?" he asked picking up his coat and his phone.

"Yes, we're sure so we'll be sure when we tell her," Serena said decisively and Nate raised his eyebrow as he led them out. "I didn't want to tell her after the first date and then we realize that we're better off as friends and we have to disappoint her."

"Serena, I get it," he said soothingly as she babbled. "I did this with Henry, it took 6 months before I introduced Lola to him."

"How old would Henry have been when you started dating Lola?" Serena asked getting into the cab Nate just flagged down, she was under the impression that Lola was in their lives from before Henry was born.

"It was only after Henry was maybe a year old when we met Lola so he would have been around t3 when we started dating," Nate clarified and Serena laughed.

"He wouldn't have really noticed if you broke up with her," Serena said, sure Henry might have noticed a slight change but that thought would have passed as soon as someone handed him a new toy.

"We couldn't have known that, he's very mature for his age," Nate said rolling his eyes dramatically. "And from the length of my relationships before Lola, Blair wouldn't take that chance."

"Honey I think Blair just didn't want Lola introduced to Henry at all," Serena said and Nate shrugged because that made sense.

"It didn't make a huge difference anyway, Lola and Henry spent almost no time together and I don't even think he's noticed she's gone," Nate said squinting slightly as he thought about it.

"He's a smart kid, he probably listened to Blair when she told him that Lola won't be around for much longer," Serena mused, Blair couldn't stand to be around Serena when she first came back but she loathed Lola even more so Serena could only imagine how much she tried to keep her son away from her.

"I don't want to talk about Lola anymore," Nate said shaking his head and getting out of the car, holding his hand out to help Serena step out. "I wanted to ask you something."

"I'm not stopping you," Serena said with a nervous laugh at his words even though his tone was relaxed. They greeted Vanya as he opened the door for them and got to the elevators before Nate spoke.

"Do you remember my family's townhouse?" he asked and Serena nodded, of course she did, half her happy childhood memories included running through that house. "It went back onto the market just before you moved back here and I put in an offer."

"And," Serena asked, the excitement bubbling up inside her, but she refused to show it until he confirmed that the house was his again.

"I signed the papers yesterday, I am officially the owner of my childhood home," Nate said and Serena hugged him tightly, knowing how much that townhouse meant to all of them growing up. "After my dad was locked up, another family bought it before I even knew so I've been waiting for it since then."

"But now you got it back," Serena said softly as they stepped into the elevator for the short ride up to her mothers.

"And now I got it back," he said. "Which brings me to the question I wanted to ask in the first place."

"Do you need me to decorate?" Serena asked, because she and Blair redecorated as often as they could when they were younger and she was pretty good at it.

"You can but that's not exactly what I was going to suggest," he said and Serena tilted her head so that she could figure out what he was talking about. "I was talking to Chuck and he said you still hadn't managed to find a place."

"That's my fault, with Erik gone and Summ still getting into her school routine, I've gotten so used to being in this place that it's not my biggest priority," Serena said guiltily.

"Right, well, I thought maybe you two could just move in with me," Nate said watching Serena, not sure how she was going to react.

"Nate," Serena said with a short laugh. "Are you serious?"

"Daddy," Summer's excited voice drifted to them as they stared at each other in the elevator.

"Hey Summ," he said stepping out of the elevator to hug his daughter.

"Did you and mom come here together?" she asked grinning at her mother who was now out of the elevator and giving her a tight smile. "Are you like together together?"

"That's one way to put it," Nate said and Serena nodded when Summer looked to her for confirmation before screaming and hugging them both.

"Jeez kiddo, didn't I tell you that you're only allowed to scream like that if someone is trying to steal you?" Erik asked walking into the room to see what all the commotion was about, since Serena and Summer were now in New York, it was easy for him to be with them every weekend without spending half a day on a plane for each flight.

"Uncle Erik!" she squealed jumping up and down and looking at him. "Guess what guess what guess what?"

"You had the whole bag of candyfloss when I told you not to?" he guessed because sugar was the only thing he could think of to explain her hyperness.

"No, mom and dad are together, like together together," she said flashing him the biggest smile she could before turning to her parents again. "I knew it, how long has this been going on and when and how and ..."

"Hey kid why don't you go tell grandma Lily," Erik said noticing the look on his sisters face and knowing that something else was happening. "Let your parents get comfortable here before bombarding them with questions."

"Oh yeah," Summer said as if she just realized there were more people in the house, Erik laughed and ran his hand over her head as she sped past him calling out for his mother.

"You guys are actually together right?" he asked and Serena nodded stepping next to Nate and hooking her arm around his. "Good, coz I would not want to break that kids heart."

"We wouldn't either," Nate told him, his eyes flashing and Erik nodded, as much as he fought with Summer and troubled her, if anyone had to hurt her even if it was her parents he would kill them. She was his little sister and he'd protect her like it.

"Ok, I'm going to keep her busy in the next room, you guys look like you need to talk," Erik said, watching the tight expression on Serena's face even though Nate looked completely at ease. "Everyone's still coming up so you might want to move away from the doors."

"Thanks E," Serena said and her brother waved his hand at them and walked away.

"So do you want to tell me why you look like I just told you we need to break up?" Nate asked pulling Serena away from the elevator to sit on the couches in the abandoned living room.

"I wasn't expecting that Nate," Serena said. "You can't just drop something like that on me before the elevator doors open to our very excitable daughter."

"I didn't know she was going to be there," Nate said and Serena shot him a look because that really was not the point.

"Isn't this too fast?" Serena asked, anxiety creeping up in her chest. They'd barely been together a few months, of course she'd loved him forever but that was from a distance, she needed to relearn everything about him before they made such a huge jump.

"I'm not saying immediately, there's still some things to do with the house before I can move in," Nate said squeezing her hands. "But every time I look at Summer I feel as if I'm missing things, I know I get to see her after school on most days but I don't get to tuck her in at night and have midnight snacks with her, I don't get to do the things I should be able to do as a dad, she's getting older, there's very little time for me to enjoy this before she gets tired of us."

"Nate," Serena whispered as tears welled up in her eyes, she hadn't thought about it like that.

"Look I love the both of you so much and I want to spend as much time as I possibly can with you to make up for everything that we lost," he said bring his hands up to cup her cheeks. "We don't even have to stay in the same room, there are plenty of rooms in the house, I even have one in mind for Erik."

"Really?" Serena asked choking out a laugh and Nate wiped the tear that fell from her eye away. "You even thought about my brother."

"He's a huge part of your life and of Summer's life and I know that you want him to feel at home with you wherever you live," he said. "I'm not expecting an answer now, just think about it, I think it's a good idea, solves your housing problem and my fatherly problems, it's an idea."

"I'm sorry, I just need sometime," Serena said and Nate shook his head to tell her there was no need to say sorry and wiped the tears that were freely flowing from her eyes. "I need to go sort out my make-up, I know I look scary."

"Yeah you kind of do," Nate said and Serena hit his arm jokingly and got up. "Hey S."

"Yes?" she asked turning to look at him.

"Can Summer still stay with me, on weekends and when you're out of town," he asked, hesitantly and Serena smiled, he was so cute, asking permission for his daughter to stay with him.

"We'll ask her later," Serena said. "But I'm sure she'll jump at the chance."

Serena walk around the corner just as the elevator pinged and Summer's voice echoed to her. "Aunt Blair guess what," and Serena laughed to herself, her girl was crazy.

* * *

The rest of the night went fairly well, Summer could barely keep the smile of her face and everyone knew as soon as they walked through the door exactly what was happening with Serena and Nate. Serena finally managed to get her to calm down enough to eat but that didn't last very long and she was bouncing in her seat before she was done with the first course but she was sitting next to Erik so Serena decided to let her be his problem.

Just before dessert came out Dan and Vanessa announced that they finally set a date for their wedding, after 3 years of being engaged, Rufus was so excited that they were finally doing it.

Blair was surprisingly quiet throughout dinner but she managed to corner Serena and Nate after dinner while everyone else was occupied with discussing wedding plans.

"I can't believe this has been going on for weeks and no-one bothered telling me," she fussed, annoyed that she was the last to know, and even more annoyed that Chuck wasn't the slightest bit fazed by the news.

"Well," Serena started but Blair cut her off.

"I don't care about 'the right time' to tell us, as your best friend I expect to have known the moment you decided this was going to happen," she ranted to Serena before turning to Nate who shot Chuck a 'help' look. "And don't even get me started on you, not only do I never see you anymore but you can't even pick up the phone and tell me what's been happening in your life."

"I speak to Chuck, I just thought he'd tell you," Nate said sheepishly, hiding himself behind Serena.

"Of course he told me, you were supposed to tell me," she growled and Serena looked at Chuck who was thoroughly enjoying himself. "The only person who seems to see you often is Henry, since you pick him up from school on the way to get Summer."

"Blair, darling," Chuck crooned and Blair rolled her eyes and nodded, they'd discussed earlier, she was going to try and control herself.

"I know I know," she said turning to the blonds and taking a deep breath. "I am really happy for you two, but I expect us to double date to make up for you not telling me."

"Of course," Serena said laughing as she hugged Blair. "I really didn't mean to keep this from you."

"You're forgiven," she said, eyeing Nate who grinned and flung an arm around her shoulders and pulled her to him.

"We love you too B," he said laughing at Blair's glare.

* * *

**A/N : I'm so sorry, I tried, real life is hard, exams and assignments and family commitments are really hard to balance with fanfiction**

**But look new chapter yey! Ok so I'm really not sure about this chapter, it has everything I wanted from it but the way its written is troubling me, I just finished it so I didn't go over it to edit so I'm not too sure of it, please let me know if its ok**

**To the guest to sent a review for me to update every couple of days, I know the frustration but I promise I didnt forget about the story I will finish this story, I wont let it hang as an incomplete just bare with me for the next month while I sort my life out. Also guests please use your names or a penname so I know who you are lol **

**Anyway, please review and let me know what you think**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**


	22. Chapter 22

"What is going on with you?" Blair hissed as she came to stand next to Serena. "First you snap at Nate, then you walk away from Lily and Rufus when they asked if you were ok and now you're acting like a teenager trying to piss off her mother, who peed in your cheerios?"

Serena took a sip of her drink and turned to glare at Blair, propping her hand on her hip and raised an eyebrow, daring the brunette to say another word.

"You can't be pregnant," Blair said, raising her eyebrow and matching her expression and posture to Serena's, two could play at that game. "No, that's not possible because you and Nate haven't done the deed yet and this..." Blair said plucking the glass out of Serena's hand and sniffing it. "Is vodka."

Serena's expression soured even more as Blair finished speaking and stood there waiting for an answer. "You're not helping," she muttered clenching her jaw when Blair poured the contents of her glass onto the ground.

"I'm not here to help you S, I'm here to stop you from making Summer's birthday party miserable," she said watching Serena's face soften as she glanced over at the newly 13 year old who was happily showing off her new pony to her friends, of course Anne and Howard would buy her a pony.

It was Summer's birthday and Serena wanted to throw her a huge party, especially now that she had her father and his family in her life. She didn't expect them to take over everything, moving the party to Grandfathers estate and providing accommodation and transport for everyone invited, handling the cleaning and catering staff, the entertainment and inviting almost all of Nate's extended family and of course buying her the most extravagant gifts. Serena just had to be comforted by the fact that she surprised Summer by flying her friends from LA to New York and seeing the pure joy in her girls eyes when she saw them step out of the limo. Take that Anne Archibald.

"They make me so mad," Serena said pressing her hands to her face and rolling her eyes. "I should have just had this in Central Park like I planned."

"And you think that would have made anything better?" Blair asked, letting out a short laugh. "They would have still been there ... ignoring you ... being the perfect grandparents ... looking at you like you were just a surrogate."

"Thank you, I get it," Serena said holding a hand up to stop Blair from continuing. "I was so prepared for them."

"You will never be ready for them," Blair said thinking of the people she thought would one day be her in-laws. "The best you can do is ignore them and focus on Summer, she the only one that matters," Blair paused as she looked around the grounds to find a pair of worried blue eyes watching them before adding, "And Nate, that boy is hopelessly in love with you."

"You know, that was actually helpful," Serena said looking up at Blair.

"I blame Henry, that child made me soft," Blair said smiling as she scanned the grounds for her energetic 5 year old.

"Where is he anyway?" Serena asked, and Blair gestured to the jumping castle that the Van der Bilts set up for Nate's cousins' children who were all at the party to meet Summer for the first time and celebrate with her.

"I'm going to go and let Erik and Jenny know that it's safe to come out of the house," Blair said and Serena rolled her eyes, she really couldn't have been bad enough that her brother was hiding from her, she definitely couldn't have been bad enough that he told Jenny to hide as well. Although since Dan and Vanessa couldn't make it, she didn't think Jenny would stray too far from Erik anyway, Nate's family could be a little intimidating, especially to those who weren't old money.

Serena watched her go and smiled to herself, how did she survive all these years without her friends, her grandmother was right to force her to come back to New York, the crazy old lady always knew what she was doing. Making sure that Summer was still occupied, Serena made her way over to Nate who was watching her wearily.

"I come in peace," she said holding up her hands and rolling her eyes. "You really didn't need to send Blair to sort me out but I'm glad you did."

"Oh I didn't," he said pulling her into a hug and Serena smiled against his chest letting the warmth of being held by Nate sooth her frayed nerves, why didn't she think of just doing this before? "Erik took one look at you and decided Blair should be the one to get through to you, because she's the scariest of all of us."

"I'm sorry," she mumbled and Nate smiled. "It's just your family ... I can't do it."

"You smell like a bar," Nate said and Serena groaned. "Give them a chance, they don't know how to be grandparents."

"Nate, they bought her a pony," Serena said throwing her arms out and sighing. "A pony!"

"You're just jealous because you didn't think about it first," Nate said knowingly and Serena rolled her eyes because yes she should have thought of that first but that wasn't the point.

"It's not that Natie," Serena said pressing her fingers to the bridge of her nose. "It's that they look at me as if I don't exist, I didn't expect open arms but I didn't expect to just be ignored."

"They don't know how to deal either," Nate said soothingly and Serena huffed out a breath, she didn't need soothing right now she needed him to fuel her anger. "Give it some time, we've worked through our problems, they still have to get used to it all."

"Mom," Summers excited voice called. "Come over here."

"I'm going to go see what the Princess wants," she said, looking over at her teenager who was waving her arms at her parents and gesturing for her mom to come to her, only stopping when Serena nodded to say that she knows what Summer wanted. "I'll find you later."

Nate leaned down and kissed her, letting his lips linger on hers until she pushed herself away from him and made her way toward their daughter, turning back and sending him a wink when she saw him checking her out. Nate laughed and shook his head before finding Chuck and walking to him.

The rest of their day went off without a hitch, despite Serena's pleading looks, Summer insisted on a family photo which had Nate's grandfather, both sets of Summer's grandparents, Rufus included, Erik, Serena and Nate surrounding her. As awkward as Serena felt standing that close to Anne and Howard, the smile on Summers face as she showed off her family to her friends was worth it.

"Today was a fun day," Erik said as he settled down next his sister and grinned at her. "Don't you think, S?"

Serena glared at her brother as her mother and Rufus heartily agreed with Erik and discussed the day, while Serena knew he was talking about her mood before Blair straightened her out. "I will set Lauren on you," Serena threatened, Summer's red-headed friend still thought that Erik was the hottest thing to walk the earth, and she wasn't shy about showing it.

"Please don't," Erik said laughing.

"Although you might have competition for her affection," Serena said wiggling her eyebrows as Erik's face turned to confusion. "I overheard her telling Hannah that Summer's father was a 'total DILF'."

Erik burst out laughing, "Does she even know what that means," he asked through his tears and Serena shrugged, Summer's friend was wildly inappropriate but she was a good kid, who loved Summer and who Summer loved back. "I wish Nate luck with that one."

"Why do I need luck?" Nate asked squeezing himself into the sofa next to Erik, putting the younger boy between him and Serena.

"Ahh Nate, there are so many places to sit and you choose this little two seater," Erik complained.

"Yeah but this one has my favourite van der Woodsens on it," Nate said, slinging his arm over the back of the sofa to grasp Serena's.

"Don't let Summer hear you say that," Erik said amusedly.

"She's an Archibald, and she's my favourite of those," Nate told him and Erik raised an eyebrow.

"We had a talk with her last week and she wants to take her fathers surname," Serena said, seeing the questioning look on her brothers face. They were hanging out in Nate's house the week before, debating how they should decorate the living room when Summer decided to spring the news on them, it wasn't that she didn't want to be a van der Woodsen anymore, she loved her mothers surname but it was time to let the world know who her dad was.

"Just abandoning us like that," Erik joked after studying his sisters face to make sure that this was ok with her. "After all that we've been through."

"Stop being so dramatic," Serena said laughing. "Summer isn't even here."

"True, there's no fun in teasing her when she's not here," he mumbled almost to himself.

"Well children, it's time we head to bed," Lily said letting Rufus pull her up, off the couch and stretching her arms. "See you in the morning darlings."

"Good night," the three of them called to Lily and Rufus.

"Now that they're gone and I'm third wheeling, I should go as well," Erik said pushing himself up off the couch and turning to look at Nate and Serena who had fallen together after he got up. "Which direction to my room?" he asked looking around.

"That way," Nate pointed in the direction of the hall that lead to the set of rooms where Summer and her friends were, Erik was going to be close by in case the teenagers needed anything.

"This place needs a map," Erik said scratching his head and walking in the direction Nate pointed.

"You doing ok?" Nate asked letting his hand bury itself in Serena's hair.

"Yeah, Summer's having the best time with her LA friends, her New York friends aren't too bad, Blair stopped me before I drank enough to embarrass us and now, we're finally alone," she smiled, bumping her nose on his, tilting her head up to kiss him.

"My parents trouble you anymore?" Nate asked between kisses.

"I really don't want to talk about your parents right now," Serena said and Nate smirked but kissed her one last time and leaned back obviously waiting for her answer. "Fine, they're manageable."

Nate raised an eyebrow and Serena sighed, he was really going to make her talk about this.

"Your mother and I managed to speak about Summer's dress without a fight happening," she said, it was a shock when Anne approached her and started rambling about Summer, they didn't speak long but it was a pleasant conversation Serena did not expect to have. "And your dad hugged me when he thought your mom wasn't looking, although I have to say your grandfather coming up to me and telling me that I've raised a good kid was the most surprising thing of the day."

"When did he do that?" Nate asked, he watched Serena the entire day, he saw everything she did and everyone she spoke to, how did he miss his grandfather speak to her?

"After Summer's New York friends left," Serena said, she didn't ask any of Summer's New York friends to stay over because she knew how much her girl missed her LA friends and that she wouldn't want to split her attention at all. "He came up behind me, said that, nodded and left before I could form a word."

"Sounds like Grandfather, always so dramatic," Nate said and Serena laughed, this family was going to love her again, she'd make sure of it.

"I think we're going to be ok," Serena whispered, biting her lip and looking at him. "All of us."

"I know we will be," Nate said pulling her legs over his.

"Are the girls ok?" Serena asked, she checked on them a while ago, telling them to go to sleep early so that they wouldn't be tired the next day but she knew they wouldn't so she sent Nate back an hour later to make sure they were asleep.

"They seemed to be having fun, I told them I'd take them riding in the morning if they got up early enough, but I doubt they're going to sleep any time soon," Nate told her and Serena rolled her eyes.

"Teenagers," she mumbled and Nate laughed.

"We have a teenage daughter," he said blowing out a worried breath, every time he thinks of Summer's age he still gets frustrated that he's missed so much of her life, but he's gotten better at stopping those feelings from turning to rage and focusing on the future. "If she is anything like you were, then we have problems."

Serena nodded until what he said sunk in and she frowned and pouted at him, Nate grinned and kissed the pout of her face.

"Where am I sleeping?" she asked as their kisses got hotter and she moved to straddle him.

"With me," Nate panted and Serena raised an eyebrow. "I'm not waiting anymore."

A few days ago at Nate's townhouse they were having a very heated make-out session when Serena stopped them from going any further and told him that she wanted them to wait just a little longer, for a time when their daughter was not in the next room and she was feeling less paranoid.

"Nate," she whispered, her breath catching in her throat when he ground their hips together. "Room, now," she said in an urgent whisper, she knew exactly where this was going and she refused to be in an open lounge area where anyone could walk in and see them.

Nate willingly obliged, standing with her legs wrapped around him and walked them to his room, shutting the door behind them, his lips never leaving hers even as they fell onto the bed.

"Are you sure?" he asked pushing himself up so he could hover above her, she knew that he was all for where this night was going but he didn't want to push that on her if she wasn't ready for it.

Serena smirked at him, unbuttoning his shirt and pulling him down to kiss him. "More than you know," she assured him breathlessly, pushing his shirt off and wrapping herself around him again, they had years to make up for, starting tonight.

* * *

**A/N : I am so sorry for this chapter coming out as late as it did but I lost all my inspiration and it took rewriting the beginning of this chapter 4 times to really be ok with it and then continue with the rest**

**Also I am starting a new job on Monday and that is requiring me to move away from home and work hours that would give me less time to write but I promise I will still get out the next chapter to you as soon as I can**

**So everyone who has been following my stories would know that I suck at smut so I don't write it, I always attempt it but it feels forced and silly so I scrap it lol but I tried to just make the end of this chapter a little sexy, hopefully you guys like that**

**Happy New Year everyone, I hope you had a wonderful festive season and I wish you all the best for the year ahead!**

**I had so much more to write and apologize for but I cannot remember now haha Please please review and let me know what you think about this chapter**

**Until Next Time (^^,)**

**PS - Points to anyone who recognized the One Tree Hill quote/reference :D**


	23. Chapter 23

"Dad, I can't find mom and ... AAHHHHH!" Summer shrieked blocking her eyes and turning around when she spotted her parents making out in bed. "Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew."

"Oh no," Serena groaned squeezing her eyes shut as Summer sprinted from the room.

Getting over his initial shock of being interrupted, Nate burst out laughing, until Serena slapped his chest and made a move to get up to follow their daughter. "I'm sorry," he said grabbing her wrist and pulling her back into bed. "She's not going to want to see you now."

"How do you know?" Serena asked cringing, as she kept a safe distance from Nate and wrapping the covers tighter around her.

"Would you really want to talk to your mom immediately after finding her in _that_ position?" he asked and Serena's face just got redder as she buried it in her hands.

"10 minutes earlier and she would never look at me again," Serena said as she started to laugh. "We've scarred our child for life."

"We weren't doing anything scandalous when she came in," Nate said rolling his eyes. "But if you want to ..."

"No," Serena said putting her finger to his lips and pushing his face away. "We should get up and get dressed and pretend that nothing of interest happened this morning," Serena said easing herself off the bed. "Wipe that smirk of your face Archibald, you should have locked the door."

Serena took 2 steps to the bathroom when she was picked up and thrown over Nate's shoulder.

"Nate!" She screamed, laughing and smacking his back with her hands. "We need to get ready."

"That's what we're doing," he said closing the door and setting her down. "This time I'm sure no-one will walk in," he grinned locking the bathroom door.

"You're so lucky you're better than you were in high school."

* * *

Nate and Serena walked into the dining room later that morning to find some of their guests sitting at the table. Her mother and Rufus left early in the morning and Nate's family had told them yesterday that they would let Summer have her time with her friends and they would be with her when her friends were gone.

"Good morning, what took the two of you so long?" Blair asked wiggling her eyebrows and looking down at their interlinked fingers, like she knew exactly what happened. Blair and Chuck stayed over, purely because Serena begged them not to leave her there without backup.

"I slept in," Serena said reaching forward to grab a strawberry from the middle of the table. "Yesterday was tiring."

"I bet," Chuck said under his breath and turning the page of the newspaper he was reading, Nate laughed as he slapped his best friends shoulder and Serena's cheeks turned bright red.

"So much for pretending," Nate whispered in her ear and Serena sighed, it seemed as if everyone knew what she and Nate were up to.

Serena's eyes found Summer but her girl kept her eyes firmly on the drawing Henry was doing next to her. Conversation flowed around her but Serena kept her eyes on Summer, who refused to look at her until Hannah nudged her and she was forced to acknowledge her mother.

Serena raised an eyebrow and Summer rolled her eyes but eventually nodded to say that she's not going to hold this against them and she'll get over it, just in time for Nate to place a kiss to the top of the girls head and grab Henry from his place, hoisting the giggling boy onto his shoulders.

"So are any of you ready to go riding?" Nate asked, knowing that none of these girls were awake enough to think about getting on a horse, 2 of them weren't even at the breakfast table.

"I am Uncle Nate," Henry said from Nate's shoulders, drowning out the girls groans.

"Of course you are, you slept on time," Nate said and Summer glared at his thinly veiled jab at her and her friends sleeping time. "We'll all go later when you guys are awake."

"Where are the other two?" Serena asked, Hannah and Kelly were sitting at the table but Lauren and the other girl whose name Serena always forgot were nowhere to be seen.

"Lauren's still asleep and Carson was getting into the shower when we left the room," Summer said shrugging and Serena shook her head, Summer always left her friends to their own devices.

"Honey go check if they're ok," Serena told her and Summer grumbled and looked at her mother with a face that said 'do I have to?'

"I'll go check," Hannah said getting up and Serena remembered why she liked Hannah more than any of Summer's other friends.

Just as Hannah got up the other two girls burst into the room, looking bewildered for a moment before realizing that they were in the right room.

"Get lost?" Nate asked and they nodded sheepishly, sitting down and helping themselves to breakfast.

"Nathaniel you really should draw a map," Chuck said, he walked into the wrong rooms more than enough times while staying at Nate's Grandfathers.

"They'll get used to it," Nate said focusing on not dropping Henry as Blair took the boy from him to get him dressed for the day.

"I can't believe you guys are leaving tomorrow," Summer said sadly, she missed her friends so much, they'd known each other since they were babies and not seeing them often was getting to Summer just a little bit.

"It's an early flight tomorrow girls," Serena reminded them, it was a long flight and they all had school on Monday. Erik was going to be the responsible adult, making sure they all got on their flights ok while Serena and Nate stayed behind with Summer so she could spend the afternoon alone with Nate's parents. "So make tonight an early night."

There was a chorus of 'ok's and grunts as the sleepy girls acknowledged her warning and Serena knew that whatever she said was going to go straight over their heads and she was going to have to drag the sleepy girls from their beds.

"Is Erik still asleep?" Chuck asked and Serena shrugged, her brother was the laziest person, adding the fact that he was up till late to keep an eye on the girls, they probably weren't going to see him that day.

The girls started giggling and all three adults groaned. "What did you guys do?" Serena asked pulling Nate's arm around her waist as he came to stand next to her.

"Nothing bad," Lauren said giving Serena her most innocent smile.

"It really wasn't anything bad," Hannah confirmed and Serena sighed, not believing them because her daughter still hadn't stopped giggling.

"Ok," Serena said reluctantly, looking down at Chuck who shook his head and muttered something about teenage girls.

"Walk?" Nate asked in a whisper and Serena nodded, tilting her head to bump her nose with his and then lead him out the door.

"Your parents are ridiculously cute," Serena heard Lauren say to Summer as they left and she couldn't agree more, she and Nate were the cutest.

* * *

Nate and Serena took a leisurely stroll through the grounds, acting like total teenagers in love, kissing in the shadows of the trees and giggling when someone from the staff happened to come across them. It felt good for both of them forget their responsibilities for a while and retake what they lost as teenagers.

With Summer and her friends comfortably in Chuck, Blair and Erik's care, all Serena needed to focus on was Nate, and she enjoyed it. It took them a few hours to decide that they couldn't just leave their responsibility to their friends and return to the house.

"Where is everyone?" Serena asked when she saw Erik sitting on the couch, looking sourly out the door.

"They're in the next room," he grumbled and Serena raised an eyebrow at her very irritable brother. Nate looked over at her and tilted his head to the door to let her know he was going to check in on what was happening with the girls.

"Ok, tell me why you look like that," Serena said sitting next to her brother once Nate had left.

"Like what," he asked, still not looking at her.

"Like a 5 year old that just had his favourite toy taken away," Serena said rolling her eyes.

"Go ask your daughter what they did to me," Erik said narrowing his eyes when he looked at her. "Never again am I babysitting those girls."

"Erik," Serena began in a questioning voice when Summer burst through the door and into the room.

"Hi mom," she said smiling widely. "Dad said to let you know he's taking us horse-riding, bye mom."

Summer was out the room and down the hall before Serena could blink, even Erik turned to see what was happening with her.

"She's excited," Serena stated.

"She's evil," Erik muttered.

"Ok seriously, what happened?" Serena asked exasperated. "Usually Summer is the one angry with you not the other way around, what did she do?"

"She and her friends just had a little fun," Chuck said from the doorway with a chuckle and Erik's frown got deeper. "Here," Chuck said handing over his phone.

"Oh," Serena said slapping her hand to her mouth to cover her smile as she looked at the phone in her hand. "It's not that bad honey."

Erik said nothing, he just stared at his sister like she had lost her mind.

"You make a very attractive clown," Chuck smirked and Erik glared at his siblings until they couldn't hold in their laughs.

Summer and her friends had waited until Erik was fast asleep before busting out the make-up set Summer received for her birthday. As far as Serena could tell they were trying to contour his face, his cheeks were so pink Serena thought they might have just drawn and smudged lipstick on his skin. His lips were a mixture of red and black and both his eyes had different colours on them, with roughly drawn and some of the most dramatic wings Serena had ever seen. But they didn't stop there, Erik had lipstick drawings down both his arms and on his chest where his sleep shirt wasn't covering.

"Oh E, it's all gone now," Serena said reaching out to touch his clean face as he tried to avoid her touch.

"I don't know how Blair did it," Chuck said shaking his head.

"A scrubbing brush," Erik huffed and both Serena and Chuck had to press their lips together to stop themselves from laughing.

"Where is Blair?" Serena asked noticing her friend's absence.

"She decided that she couldn't let Nate be in charge of all those kids by himself," Chuck said and Serena rolled her eyes. It was weird at first to see Nate and Blair be so platonic considering where they were when she left but when she looks at them now it's like they're siblings.

"Well, at least I know those kids will be taken care of," Serena said sighing with relief and Erik rolled his eyes.

"I hope they fall of their horses," he grumbled and Serena punched his arm.

"Erik van der Woodsen, that is enough from you," Serena scolded.

"You might want to reconsider sending him with them to the airport tomorrow," Chuck mentioned and then asked Erik something about his degree and school, distracting him from his annoyance and let Serena check out of the conversation and think about other things.

She would actually like to have left Grandfathers estate when Summer's friends did, but Anne Archibald insisted on keeping her granddaughter and son for one night without any other family or friends around and Nate had managed to convince her to stay there with them... It's too bad she could convince Chuck and Blair to stay one more night for the sake of her sanity.

Even though his family looked as though they were accepting her back into their lives, Serena wasn't sure what alone time with them would bring. Then again, she had Nate and Summer with her and they would keep her sane, they always did, her little family.

"Why don't you and Blair take the devils," Erik grumbled looking pointedly at Chuck who shrugged.

"We are heading in the opposite direction, and you, Mr. van der Woodsen are flying back to collage," he said with a smirk.

"Plus you volunteered," Serena offered and Erik almost growled. "You'll get over it," she said pulling him to her and hugging him tight.

* * *

Summer promised to massage Erik's head anytime he wanted it for the rest of his life and gave him her best puppy dog eyes and he forgave her in a heartbeat, Serena and Chuck stood there shaking their heads and wondering how to toughen Erik up when it came to Summer, he complained about her so much but all she had to do was look at him sadly and he would give her anything she wanted. Come to think of it, Nate was exactly the same, Serena sighed, between the two of them Summer would literally be able to get away with anything.

"What are you thinking?" Nate asked as Serena collapsed on the bed next to him and snuggled close to him.

"I'm thinking that I'm so happy she only has one of these a year," Serena mumbled tiredly and Nate chuckled, running his fingers through her hair gently. "And I'm so happy that Blair decided to stay over tonight."

"We could have survived without her," Nate said rolling his eyes and Serena picked her head up to give him a look. "You could have handled those girls by yourself."

"You are delusional," Serena laughed, kissing his chest, in all of Summer's other sleepovers with her friends she had her Grams and those girls were terrified of defying the old lady, the same way they were terrified of defying Blair. "But I love you for thinking that."

"Are you ok?" Nate asked after a quiet moment, and Serena made a noise, tilting her head to rest her chin on his chest.

"I'm fine, just thinking," she said biting on her lip and Nate bobbed his head to gesture to her to continue. "The townhouse is basically done right?"

"It's just the guest bedroom's that need work now," he said after thinking about it for a moment. "I've been living there for the past 3 weeks, I'd hope it was done," he chuckled.

"Ok, cause I was thinking that maybe Summer and I can move in there ... permanently," Serena said biting her lip as she waited for his answer, it had been a while since he asked her to move in the first time, and every time she came over to help him decorate he and Summer would look at her like it would be perfect but there was something stopping her, something that was missing when she thought about it now. "Say something," she whispered, pushing herself of his chest, when he didn't speak.

"Are you serious?" he asked a smile threatening to break out on his face.

"As serious as can be," she said shrugging and waiting for it to sink in. "Ahh," Serena squealed when Nate grabbed her and flipped them over, kissing her.

"You have no idea how happy this makes me," he said brushing their noses together.

"I know, Natie, I know."

* * *

**A/N : So this story is basically at it's end, its about time NS move in together right lol I am so sorry I haven't updated in so many months, but I have begun my new job and its a little daunting and exciting and there's so much to learn that I feel like I'm in school again with all the studying lol and then there's my assignments that I have to complete to hopefully, finally be done with my degree  
**

**Anyway the point is, I apologize for the long waits between chapters, I have written out 2 more chapters to bring this story to 25 chapters and it's end but I am a little worried about how you guys are going to react to those chapters. It sort of sets up for a sequel if I decide to write one so hopefully I get the inspiration because I am horrible with sequels **

**I do have a question, would you like to see a sequel to this story or a series of one-shots like i attempted with Misguided ghosts? I realize that wasn't the story to write a one shot series on and that this story has alot more to tell from before they came back to New York to what their future brings but I will ask again after I've posted the final chapter**

**So since i'm done, i will be editing in my free time and hopefully i'll have the chapters out to you by next week :D my cousin is getting married this weekend so maybe not both chapters but definitely one lol **

**Please please review and let me know what you think**

**Until next time (^^,)**


	24. Chapter 24

"You know what would make this room perfect?" Summer said as she sat on her parents bed in their room watching them unpack her mother's things, it had been a week since Summer's 13th birthday weekend when Serena had let Nate know that she wanted herself and Summer to permanently move in with him.

"You helping me find place for all this," Serena deadpanned.

"No," she said dragging out the 'o' and holding her hands out, squinting on eye as if she were measuring something on the wall.

"I don't see it," Nate said coming to stand next to the bed so he could see what she was seeing.

"That's because it's not there yet daddy," she said smiling sweetly at him.

"And what would 'it' be?" Nate asked as Serena abandoned the box she was unpacking and sat on the bed on Summer's other side, waiting for an answer.

"A giant picture of me," she said tilting her head and grinning as her parents shared a look over her head.

"Why?" Serena asked slowly and Summer frowned.

"Because you love me that much and you'd want to see me every morning when you wake up and every night when you go to sleep," she informed them and Nate and Serena looked at the empty wall wearily.

"We do love you, Summ," Nate said nodding.

"Just not enough for a giant picture," Serena mumbled and Summer gasped and crossed her arms.

"It was just a suggestion," she pouted as Nate wrapped his arms around her and Serena started tickling her tummy relentlessly. "Ok, ok," she squealed with tears running down her face from laughing so much, Nate let her go and Serena stopped tickling her and all three of them lay on the bed giggling with each other. "I'll settle for a framed picture on each of your bedside tables."

"Hey," Serena exclaimed rolling over to grab Summer again but finding her already off the bed.

"Hannah is going to facetime me now from a party they're at," she called as she bounced out of the room. "I can't miss that."

"That child," Serena said affectionately shaking her head and looking over at Nate who was leaning back on his arms watching their daughter disappear from their room.

"Summer really misses LA," Nate said softly thinking about how close Summer and her friends were.

"She misses her friends, those girls have been friends since they were in diapers," Serena said smiling as she thought of her chubby blond baby girl getting startled when a fiery red head marched up to her and pulled a toy out of Summer's hands, before Serena or Laurens mother could react, Hannah had already toddled over and distracted both of them, they had been inseparable ever since.

"Maybe we should move to LA," Nate said sighing and Serena raised her eyebrows.

"We?" she asked, she didn't doubt that he would pack everything up and leave with them but his entire life was in New York and honestly, so was hers. "Summer wants to stay here, you can't pack up my mom and your parents, Erik, Chuck and Blair and bring them to LA with you, because those are the people she really wants to be around every day."

"What about her friends?" Nate asked, his 3 best friends were his family when he was Summer's age, he wanted her to have that closeness with her friends forever.

"They'll be fine, they will keep in touch, we can fly them out here as often as they want or we can visit," Serena told him, leaning up to kiss him. "They. Will. Be. Fine."

"S," he started but Serena shook her head and jumped of the bed, holding her hands out to pull him up as well.

"Summer couldn't care less about being in LA, not when her grandparents and godparents are right here in New York," Serena said placing her hands on his cheeks and shaking his head, Summer was in love with New York, thanks in no small part to the amount of family there that absolutely adored her, as much as Serena didn't want to think about Nate's family and their coldness toward her, she knew that they would do anything for her daughter. "None of those thoughts, especially not when I'm almost done unpacking my clothes."

"The shoes are still in its boxes," Nate mentioned with a grin and Serena glared.

"Those will be unpacked before you know it," she said waking into her closet to start hanging her dresses.

"I know that I will be looking at those unpacked boxes for months," he said coming up behind her and resting his chin on her shoulder. "Because you will buy new shoes every time you meet Blair for 'lunch'."

"I'm still not repacking my clothes to move back to LA," Serena said, patting the hands resting on her hips and continuing.

"Think of all the privacy we'd have," he said thinking about how people loved bursting into his house when he lived in his apartment, he knew Blair and Chuck and even his parents wouldn't stop now that he has his daughter and girlfriend living with him.

"We have privacy right now," she told him amusedly, at this point she knew she wasn't serious about moving anymore but she never knew that he put this much thought into moving.

She was about to say something else when Blair's voice filtered into their room and Nate gave her a pointed look and unwrapped himself from around her to go and see exactly where Blair was in their house.

"You're still unpacking?" she asked bursting into their room before Nate could make it to the door. "Chuck's got Henry in the lounge," she said dismissing Nate and talking a seat in the couch in the closet.

"It's always nice to see you B," he said rolling his eyes and sharing a look with Serena before leaving.

"How did you get in?" Serena asked, she was pretty certain she locked the door.

"I had a key made," Blair said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders.

"When?" Serena asked, she can't remember giving Blair a key to make a copy unless Nate or Summer had.

"You underestimate me," Blair said knowing what Serena was thinking, and Serena narrowed her eyes at Blair, thinking back to high school when she made an impression of the math teachers cupboard key when the old lady was distracted so she could make a key and let Serena complete her paper.

"I thought you would have given all those little tricks up after high school," Serena told her amused.

"Oh S, you need these tricks more in the working world," she said and Serena rolled her eyes and nodded.

"What are you guys doing here anyway?" Serena asked, closing her cupboards with a sigh, she was never going to fully unpack her things. "I thought we were meeting later?"

"We are," Blair said looking at her best friend a little confused. "We came to see if you know anything about the emergency meeting your mother called for this afternoon."

"What emergency meeting?" Serena asked, furrowing her brows and started digging around for her phone.

"The emergency meeting that Erik is flying here for," Blair told her, following her back into the main room. "Serena what are you doing?"

"I'm finding my phone," she said finally locating it under a pile of her coats. "What do you mean Erik is flying to New York, he only went back last week," she said, Erik saw them at least once a month but with his exams coming up later that month, he wasn't going to fly to New York unless there was an emergency.

"S, I don't think anything's wrong," Blair soothed, seeing the panic build up in Serena. "Lily sounded calm, she just said she needed to speak to all her children about something that she recently found out."

"Oh god," Serena said not liking the sound of that, she had 14 missed calls from her mother and 4 messages asking to call and then just letting her know that she should meet at Lily and Rufus' house later that day. "Do you think she's sick?"

"No, no, it's not that," Blair said reaching out to steady Serena who was going into full panic mode.

"How do you know?"

"Because Chuck already checked all that," Blair assured her and Serena took a breath and sat down, nodding to herself, letting herself be calmed by the fact that Chuck would have checked every detail to find out if her mother was ill. "He couldn't find any reason for this emergency meeting, which is why we came over to see if you knew something."

"No, I know nothing," Serena said letting out a breath and falling back onto the bed. "She's probably throwing some kind of crazy event and needed our opinions, she has done that before."

"And she never cared about pulling any one of us out of school for it," Blair said sitting next to Serena and remembering Lily's third wedding dress dilemma, where she and Serena were both pulled out of class because of an emergency, just to find out that they were being taken to the store to help Lily feel better about the dress she was buying.

"I guess my mom has always been a little bit dramatic," Serena said laughing and Blair nodded.

"Where's Summer?" Blair asked, Serena's little doppelganger would have come out to greet her as soon as she heard her favourite aunts voice.

"She's talking to Hannah and Lauren," Serena said sitting up. "Don't expect her anytime soon."

"Is it weird sleeping in Anne and Howard Archibald's old room," Blair asked, making a face as she looked around the massive master bedroom.

"I didn't find it weird until you mentioned that," Serena squeaked and Blair laughed, she was not good for Serena's emotions today.

"Come on, let's go find the boys, before I say anything else," Bair said with a little smirk.

* * *

Summer sat between her Uncle Erik and her dad watching her mother pace in front of their couch at her grandmothers apartment. Lily sat opposite them watching her as well, they were waiting for Blair, Chuck and Henry to start their meeting.

"Finally," Serena exclaimed as the elevator pinged and they walked through the door. "What took you so long?"

Chuck and Blair exchanged a look, that didn't go unnoticed by Serena, who opened her eyes wider as if asking what they were hiding. Blair cleared her throat and put Henry down, who ran straight to Nate, climbing up onto Nate's lap and showing Summer his new toy.

"Well darlings, I'm glad you made it," Lily interrupted before Serena could say anything. "Why don't you all sit down so we can talk?"

Chuck mumbled something to Lily, who nodded tensely and moved to stand next to Rufus, who smiled encouragingly. Serena remained standing, only taking a step back so she was next to Nate and he could take her hand and rub circles on the back of it, in the hopes of calming her. Henry, sensing the mood of the room, got off Nate and went to sit between his parents, holding onto Chucks arm.

"I called you here today because I recently found out something that could change your lives," Lily said and Nate squeezed Serena's hand because he could tell how frustrated she was getting, waiting for her mother to get to the point.

"You're not dying are you?" Erik asked and everyone turned to look at him, even Henry, who wasn't paying any attention to Erik. "She said life changing emergency, what else could it be?"

"No Darling, I'm perfectly healthy," Lily said with a chuckle and Erik nodded and slid down in his seat. "But ... I um ... I found your father."

"You, what?" Serena asked, feeling light headed, she felt Nate stand up behind her and support her weight as her body leaned back onto him of its own accord.

"Where?" Erik asked, raising his eyebrows, he knew Serena looked for that man everywhere, he didn't have any desire to find the man who abandoned him when he was basically a newborn but his sister loved their father and she spent a good portion of her time trying to track him down.

"You knew," Serena said looking at Chuck and Blair before Lily could answer. "A little warning would have been nice, like this afternoon when you came to ask me what I knew."

"We didn't know when we saw you S," Blair explained, rubbing Henry's back.

"We only found out just before you did," Chuck told her.

"How?" Erik asked and Serena looked back at her brother as if just realising he was still in the room and then looking up at her mother who smiled sadly.

The elevator pinged and the doors opened as Lily started to talk. "Serena, you remember that Carol was at your grandmother's funeral and you thought it was odd," Lily asked and Serena nodded, her eyes at the open elevator that a man was exiting to enter the apartment with his back to her. "Well I did some digging, turns out she married your father once our divorce went through."

"Don't make it sound like I ruined your marriage Lillian," Carol said, walking in after the man and Serena thought she was going to faint, because standing right there after 21 years was her father.

"I apologize, I don't know how else to explain the woman who was sleeping with my husband," she said with a fake smile and Summer gasped and looked around, waiting for someone to find this entire situation as shocking as she did, but they all just looked as if they were expecting it, except for Henry who was hiding underneath his father's coat.

"Serena," William van der Woodsen smiled, taking a step toward her and she took a step back, half behind Nate who acted as a shield between them, William frowned but turned his attention to Erik, who acknowledged him with raised eyebrows. "My boy."

"Erik," he said, fully aware that his father probably knew his name but he didn't want to be called anything else by this man.

"Erik," William repeated with a tight smile, taking in the other occupants of the room. "I don't think I know the rest of you."

"I'm sure you remember Serena's friends from when she was a child," Lily said pointing to the other three adults in the room. "And that right there is our granddaughter."

William stared at Summer who stared right back at him, she knew that this man abandoned her mother but she never thought they'd ever meet him. "Erik's?" he asked, noting how close Summer and Erik were sitting.

"Serena's," Erik said with a bitter laugh. "How old do you think I am?"

"I'm sorry, she just looks like you," he said and Erik almost growled because that man was still looking at his niece.

"She looks like Nate," Serena said speaking for the first time since her father walked into the room. The elevator pinged again and Serena clenched her fists. "What other surprises could you possibly have?"

"That would be our daughter," Carol said stepping up to touch her husband's arm possessively, looking at Serena with a little smile, that Serena could not help but shiver uncomfortably at, Summer made a face, that's the same thing Lola did to her father when she was marking her territory. "You might know her."

"Lola," Serena deadpanned as the other blond came into the room, she knew from the moment she met the girl that there was something familiar about her, she just never expected Lola to end up being her half-sister. "I can't do this."

Serena almost sprinted for the doors, with Nate shared a look with Chuck and then left as well, close on Serena's heels. Summer watched them go and then groaned and threw her head back against the sofa. "Oh crap."

"What?" Erik whispered as the others recovered from Serena and Nate's departure.

"I'm never going to get rid of her, am I?"

* * *

**A/N : Ok so that is the end of chapter 24! one more chapter left in this story and we're done which makes me both really sad and really excited to start working on other stories, I wanted to put everything into this story to make it amazing and so far I think I have achieved that**

**I know that this is a terrible time to bring in William van der Woodsen but I made references to Lola looking familiar to them in a few places and i didnt want to wait for a sequel that I wasnt sure i would write to bring that back up, if a sequel does happen I'm bringing in William and Carol and their story as a beginning to it **

**Alot of you guys have reviewed and said that you would like a sequel over a oneshot series so I am going to try my hardest to do that for you :D I am so glad that all of you are still here at the end of our PMABS journey **

**Please review and I'll talk to you guys again in the final chapter **

**Until next time (^^,)**


	25. Chapter 25

"Are you sure Summer doesn't want to come back to the house?" Nate asked.

"I'm pretty sure, she's having some girl time with Blair right now, but we'll be over a little later," Erik said sighing and Nate could hear the weight in his voice, he'd met his father for the first time, he didn't really know how to deal with it.

"I'll get Rose to set up the guest room next to Summer's before she leaves," Nate said flagging down the woman as she walked passed and pointing to the room he needed to be set up.

"Thanks Nate," Erik said feeling a little better that he didn't have to go back to his mother's house. "How's she doing?"

"She's locked herself in the room, but she'll be fine," Nate told him, he chased Serena all the way down to the lobby where she let him take over and get them a cab to go home, as soon as they reached she locked herself in their room and he was left to make sure Summer and Erik were taken care of while he waited. "She'll want to talk to you later."

"I know, that's what I'm afraid off," Erik mumbled and Nate chuckled.

"What happened after we left?" Nate asked wearily, he wasn't sure that he wanted to know but he knew Serena would want details.

"William looked like we hurt him," Erik said and Nate could practically hear him rolling his eyes. "It was awkward, Chuck just got up after Serena left, said bye to my mom and ushered us out to the car where Arthur was waiting."

"That sounds ... really uncomfortable," Nate said.

"You have no idea, my mom said they left after that without saying much," Erik told him. "I don't get why they just decided to show up now after all these years."

"Sorry Erik, I have no answers for you, I'm going to go see if I can talk to Serena again," Nate said rubbing his temple. "I'll see you two later, Summer has her key."

"Thanks bro," Erik said. "Oh Chuck said to let you know that you definitely have a type," he said chuckling before cutting the call.

Nate rolled his eyes and stared at his phone for a moment, walking to the sofa in front of his fireplace and collapsed heavily only it, it had been only a year since Serena and Summer walked into his life and in some ways it felt as if it had been years since he found them walking around central park.

"Hi," Serena croaked, walking toward him, she was wrapped up in a big blanket and her eyes were puffy and red. Nate opened his arms and she practically ran into them, covering them both with the blanket and burying her face into his neck. "I'm sorry."

"I know babe," he soothed as she began crying again. He did know, he knew that Erik was a few months old and Serena was 7 when their father left them one day, he knew that the man left divorce papers on the coffee table for Lily to sign and no other goodbye. He knew that Serena took her father's leaving really badly and over the next 8 years that she was in New York she tried multiple things to find him and get him back home, he knew that none of that worked and each time she'd lose a little more of her faith in people, he knew that he hated William van der Woodsen for that. "Summer and Erik are with Chuck and Blair."

"Oh God, I'm the worst mother in the world," she said into his shirt and Nate shook his head.

"Chuck and Blair were right there S," he assured her. "You could never be a bad mother even if you tried."

"But I left my child and my brother with that man," she said picking her head up and wiping her cheeks furiously, starting to panic.

"Hey, look at me," he said taking her face in his hands gently and waiting for her eyes to meet his. "They are fine, Chuck got them out of there immediately after we left, ok?"

Serena nodded wearily and Nate dropped his forehead to rest on hers closing his eyes. "Can we go to sleep and pretend that this day never happened?" Serena asked in a soft voice and Nate laughed lifting his head to press a kiss to her forehead before leaning back against the cushions and taking Serena with him.

"I'll be right here when you wake up," he whispered when she gripped his shirt.

"I love you," she mumbled and Nate smiled, he knew she was the strongest person in his world and he knew that she'd get through this.

* * *

"I always thought you would follow him around like a puppy, when you saw him again," Erik said later that evening when he and Serena finally got down to talking.

"So did I, I didn't expect to want to rip his head off," Serena said pressing her palms against the hot mug in her hands. "I think maybe it's because I have Summer now and I know what it's like to be a parent, and every time I watch Nate with her I know how a father should be."

"Well, you did good under the circumstances," Erik said nodding and Serena raised an eyebrow and laughed.

"E, I ran out as fast as I could as soon as I saw Lola," she said shaking her head at herself. "I barely even thought about my child who was ..."

"Completely fine because her uncle was right next to her," Erik told her exasperated, Serena could not get over the fact that she left Summer and ran off, even though the teenager was surrounded by her grandmother and aunt and uncles and was perfectly comfortable with them.

"I can't believe he's gone again," she mumbled.

"Hopefully he'll wait another 21 years before trying to make contact again," Erik said and Serena looked at him with watery eyes. "Come on S, after everything, do you really want to see him again?"

"It would have been nice if he waited or tried again, he could have stuck around for one more day," Serena complained, her father and aunt had already left town, it was barely 3 hours since the meeting, to say Serena was pissed would be an understatement.

"Why do you think he was even here?" Erik asked, that was still troubling him, his mother was happy with Rufus, his sister hadn't attempted to contact the old man since Summer was maybe 7 years old, what reason could he possibly have for wanting to see them again.

"I think it was Carol," Serena said, scratching her chin. "Maybe Lola told her I ruined her perfect life with Nate so they decided to come mess my life up."

"How did Nate not know that Lola was a van der Woodsen?" Erik asked following Serena's eyes out to the trampoline in the backyard that Summer and Nate were currently laying on looking up at the night sky and giggling about something.

"Penelope van der Woodsen came to New York as Lola Williams, to study acting," Serena said, tearing her eyes away from the happy scene outside to look at her brother. "van der Woodsen wasn't screen worthy."

"Ha," Erik snorted. "That girl was delusional, at least now we know why we both thought she looked so familiar."

"That reminds me of something Summer told me, about Lola trying to talk to her because she met her father for the first time when she was a child," Serena said, it would have made sense, her dad left them just after Erik was born, around the last time they saw Carol, Lola would have been about 4 or 5 at that time if Serena's math was correct.

"So he left mom and us for Carol and her daughter?" Erik asked, scratching his head. "What a lovely father we have."

"How are you so relaxed about this?" Serena asked commenting on Erik's blasé tone of voice and demeanour.

"He's a stranger to me," Erik said shrugging. "We saw mom a couple times a year but you were my mom and dad," he said grinning and Serena rolled her eyes but pulled her little brother to her and hugged him.

"You'll always be my first baby," she said only half teasing as Erik buried his face into her shoulder, comfortable to stay there for a while, even though Serena had always made sure he was loved, it had been years since he felt this kind of comfort and he held onto it for as long as he could.

"What's going on here?" Summer's voice broke through their moment and Serena and Erik separated and looked up at her.

"Everything ok?" Nate asked pulling his chair closer to Serena's as he sat next to her, across from them Summer and Erik started needling each other.

"It will be," she said leaning over to kiss him quickly. "Break it up you two."

"But mom," they both whined and Serena laughed as she pulled Nate's arms around her shoulders, her family, this was her fully dysfunctional perfect family and she wasn't going to let Lola and her dad ruin this for her.

* * *

Serena cupped her cheeks and propped her elbows on the table in front of her, staring at the steam rising from her coffee cup.

"It's not going to cool down faster if you stare at it like that," Blair commented and Serena stuck her tongue out. "What's going on with you?"

"So tired," Serena said yawning, she had flown to LA to check on her offices there and her flight back got delayed, meaning that she only landed early that morning, barely getting enough sleep before she had to get up to get to Henry's birthday party.

"You could go home and sleep for a while," Blair said when Serena yawned again and the blond shook her head and slapped her cheeks a few times to wake herself up.

"And miss my favourite nephews birthday? Like I did last year?" she said with a laugh and Blair shrugged, they were not on speaking terms back then, she had nothing to apologise for. "Besides, if I were gone then you would have to mingle with those moms."

"Urg," Blair said sipping on her wine and staring Henry's friends parents who were sitting on the other side of the rented out park, chatting among themselves. "I'd rather go kick a ball with Nate."

Serena smiled and looked over at the mass of 6 year old boys chasing a soccer ball with her Natie right in the middle of it all. Chuck was sitting on the sidelines with Summer, they were making sure nothing was going wrong. Serena shook her head, her daughter was taking after her step brother was too much for her liking.

"How is Erik?" Blair asked smiling tightly and holding up a hand to one of the moms who called her, motioning to Serena to say that they were having a private conversation that couldn't be postponed.

"Maybe I should leave," Serena teased and Blair shot her a scathing look. "He's doing fine, excited to finally be graduating next month."

"Psychology," Blair mused. "Who would have thought our little Erik would become a psychologist?"

"Have you seen how crazy our family life has been? I think this is the perfect profession, he already has so much experience dealing with all this dysfunction," Serena said and Blair laughed and then clasped her hand over her mouth.

"This is supposed to be serious," she whispered and Serena pressed her lips together and nodded very seriously. "How is your dysfunctional family? Lily hasn't mentioned hearing from _them_."

"None of us have heard anything," Serena said running the tip of her finger over the rim of her cup as she looked down into it. "I tried finding him but it's like the 3 of them just dropped off the face of the planet ... again."

"Do you and Nate want more kids?" Blair asked suddenly ending the conversation about William and Serena's eyes widened as she almost spit out her coffee.

Forcing herself to swallow, she replied. "I can barely keep up with my teenage daughter, flying around the country and making sure I have time for Nate, what makes you think I have time for a baby?" she asked with an awkward laugh staring at Blair who shrugged. "Besides, Nate looks completely comfortable with just Summer and I, what makes you think he'll want another child."

"Because Summer is the best thing that happened to him and look at how good he is with all those kids," Blair said and Serena looked over to see a group of little boys looking at her boyfriend like he was their hero. "He missed out on these exciting years with his own child, I'm sure he's dying for a chance to do it all."

"Maybe," Serena said, watching Nate run around the ground. "Why the sudden interest anyway?"

"I'd just like company the next time," Blair said with a smile winking at Henry when he waved at her.

"You're pregnant?" Serena asked with wide eyes, staring at her best friend and grabbing her wine out of her hands.

"Not yet," Blair laughed, taking her wine back. "Chuck and I spoke about having more than one child when we got married and Henry asked for a brother for his birthday, so we had a conversation or two and thought maybe its time."

"Oh, I could cry," Serena said with tears in her eyes. "I'm going to be here for everything this time."

"We're doing this together, I'm going through that again unless you're suffering with me," Blair said and Serena covered her face as she laughed.

"Oh B," she said shaking her head fondly. "I don't know, I think Summer would be jealous if there was another baby, knowing that she didn't get both her parents together like her sibling would."

"That child is the most accepting and excitable girl I have ever met," Blair said and Serena smiled. "She would be over the moon if you had another baby."

One of the mothers called Blair again and she groaned and got up to see what exactly they wanted form her. Serena bit her lip as she looked at her daughter, explaining something animatedly to Chuck and wondered if Blair was right, maybe Summer would be ok with it, but Serena felt like she would have too much guilt over having another baby with Nate and giving it the perfect childhood while she deprived her daughter of a childhood with her father.

* * *

It was a few nights later when she and Nate were alone at their house that Nate asked her what was wrong and she thought she should tell him. Summer was at Lily's, having a sleepover with Jenny who had moved in with her father and Lily, while her apartment floors were being redone.

"Nothing's wrong," Serena said smiling and as Nate took a seat next to her and looked at her like he didn't believe her.

"Really?" Nate asked raising his eyebrows. "Because ever since Henry's party, you've been very quiet and I know it's not just because you're tired."

"Blair was talking about having another baby," Serena said with a sigh, knowing that she'd rather tell him what's on her mind instead of letting him come to his own conclusions.

"Is she pregnant?" Nate asked happily and Serena shook her head no, causing Nate to look at her confused. "Ok so they're thinking about it?"

"Yes," Serena confirmed reaching over run her fingers through his hair and rest at the base of his neck. "But ... she wants me to be pregnant as well, so we can be fat together and have babies that will grow up to be best friends like we planned when we were kids."

"Oh," Nate said nodding and Serena tried to read his face. "Is that something you'd want? To have another baby?"

"Is that something you'd want?" Serena countered nervously laughing and letting out a deep breath. "I would love to be able to give you what you missed with Summer, but I don't want to take you away from her so soon after she found you."

"Oh," Nate said again taking it all in. "You know, having another baby isn't going to take me away from Summer and you know that she would love it," Nate said and Serena frowned a little, everyone suddenly knew her daughter better than she did.

"That is yet to be determined," Serena said a little irritably. "But we'll talk to her first."

"We have time," Nate said and Serena smiled, they didn't have as much time as she liked but he was right, there was nothing that needed to be rushed just yet. "We're not ready just yet."

"I need time to come to terms with having another baby Archibald," Serena said and Nate chuckled.

"You know," Nate said with a mischievous grin that Serena narrowed her eyes at. "Whether we have another baby or not, you're still the only van der Woodsen in this house."

Serena sighed dramatically and shrugged, Summer's paperwork finally went through and she was now officially Summer Charlotte Archibald. "I have Erik when he's here."

"Yeah but when he's not here you're probably so lonely," Nate said in such a silly voice that she had to laugh, squealing as he got up and scooped her into his arms, carrying her to the bedroom. "So, I propose we change that."

Serena raised an eyebrow at his words and he tipped his head to tell her to look in front of them and she gasped. Their room was lit up with the glow of candles lit all around it and rose petals on the floor and bed. "Yes."

"I didn't ask anything yet," Nate whispered as he gently dropped her feet to the floor and kissed the side of her neck.

"Unless this is a really evil joke, you don't have to," Serena said spotting the open velvet box on the bed with the van der Bilt ring that she assumed Anne gave him after Summer's birthday, sticking out of it. "Definitely yes."

Nate didn't get to say anymore because Serena's hands were on his face and her lips were over his. This was their story getting a happy ending, it was everything she dreamed of and more. Now she couldn't wait for what the future had in store.

* * *

**A/N : And that my darlings, concludes Paint me a Blue Sky :D  
It has been an absolute pleasure writing this story and reading your reviews and comments, when I started this story in 2014 I had no idea how amazing the response would be and here we are 1 and a half years later finally at the end **

**It has been such an amazing journey and I hope you guys love the ending as much as I do, my Nate and Serena from this world make me so so happy and Summer has become one of my favorite characters to write! I am not ready to let her go just yet so that sequel that you guys asked for might just be coming soon :) I asked in a previous chapter if you would like a one shot series or sequel and most of you guys said sequel so I am going to try my hardest to deliver, keep an eye out for that**

**There is so much to say but I don't know where to begin haha Gossip Girl ended so long ago but I think theres still quite a bit that I can write, especially for NS, my goal on this site was always to get more NS stories than DS lol and while there are still less NS stories I think I've written enough to close that gap :D weird goal I know but I just wanted my NS to have something over DS**

**If there are any stories that you guys would like me to write please please review or PM me and let me know so I can write them for you, I am a little busy with this new job so I might not post very soon but I will write and post in my free time, I would also like to start writing properly for other fandoms, like Haleb from PLL, I dont know if you guys would read that but when I finally work up the courage to post in those fandoms please check it out, I have written little stories before but GG has been my main fandom**

**I think that's it, please review and let me know what you think of PMABS and how it ended and what you would like to see in the sequel and I will chat to you soon **

**Until next time (^^,)**


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